2013 April

Sunday April 14, 2013

The Coconut Telegraph

Like Letters To The Editor With Pictures

Classified Ads     Bulletin Board     Business Directory      Contact Us      More …    

an back keyboard



(Hi ho, Deer Readers the Coconut Telegraph is back. Let the games begin!)

[Political Correctness] I think the Good Friday picture shown on the Big Pine with the banner across the crucifix was the most sacrilegious thing I have ever seen. It was a personal affront to those of us who have Christian views and beliefs. 
Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email. 

an fast food2


Why are fast food joints so bright? When fast food restaurants use softer, more relaxed lighting patrons eat 175 fewer calories

Lots new in the Balfour Beatty tax case. The most outrageous is that the Florida Senate passed its version of their loophole bill which will exempt Balfour from paying property taxes on their privately owned housing. The Florifa House takes it up this week despite, or probably , because the Property Appraiser’s court case looks so strong. Also , a smoking gun turned up from Santa Rosa County where Balfour sort of paid taxes on its housing units there. Of course we got nothing here in Monroe. The School Board passed a resolution opposing the tax exemption and Congressman Garcia has taken a strong stand against it in Washington. It’s all at I think they do the best investigative reporting in Monroe County.



My masked friend sent me this photo of the tarpon he caught in the Everglades, but someone took a big bite out of it before he could release it.

Fur flying in Florida as cat lovers push law to protect strays. Just wait until a pack of wild cats attach some kids or a baby left unguarded, then we will see who is protecting those wild life menaces.Killer dogs are next! Link

an knight bbq



Raymond Chandler defined it best. He described the film noir hero as a knight in dirty armor. 

Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email. 

I don’t know who titled this link – but KLWTD is not a co-op, the employee in this discussion is not  a valuable employee.   Actually quite the opposite.  There are just oodles of complaints about him – rude,  verbally abusive,  hostile  – coming in from many KLWTD  customers.  

At a recent public board meeting,  this employee snickered derisively while a KLWTD customer was at the podium speaking.  To the speakers credit – she stopped speaking,  turned to him (the employee) and said to him – “What,  you think that’s funny?”  To which the employee just squirmed in his seat.

This employee submitted a resume with the employment application claiming to have run businesses over time periods which SunBiz has the businesses as inactive.  A few other things on his resume also can not be verified as accurate.

This employee allegedly just got a $20, 000+ salary increase (as yet not able to confirm that because KLWTD has not yet responded to requests for public info) .  If true,  then that employee can afford his own undergraduate degree.

KLWTD customers are going without their meds,  making other serious financial cutbacks,  while this employee takes music appreciation and nutrition.

This employee – at a recent KLWTD public board meeting – said to a KLWTD customer who was speaking a the podium about an upcoming homeowners meeting and this KLWTD employee attending that HO meeting – the employee said “no,  no way are we going to go,  we will only get beat up” .  That should give you a clear picture about what type of person this employee is.  And one more thing – this is the same employee who when he could not get another employee to do something his way – slammed his fist into the wall of that person’s office.

This employee was hired as an IT person,  but had no (and may not yet have) the educational certificates to justify being able to do the job.  And because the general manager does not like to deal with admin parts of her job,  or else has some sort of needy thing going on,  lets this employee be her assistant.  And her personnel skills are also dismal,  as proven by her inability to discipline this employee when he insults the KLWTD customers.

And stay tuned,  because some former employees have a lot more to tell about this employee,  and are just waiting until their lawyer gets their cases together.

As an aside,  KLWTD education program needs to be revised to only to only post graduate and professional development 


Thank God you’re back. Just think about the gossip I have to catch up on–it will take weeks. Hope you are refreshed, renewed and ready to keep us all informed.

Could someone post who knows if the wind insurance is going to be allowed to go up 137% or did the state representatives nip that in the bud. Does anyone else seem to think Monroe county is being targeted just because of the median income of the average homeowner?

And FEMA going broke and having to raise up all the flood insurance rates! Well if they would stop paying out to people who do not take out the insurance they might be able to pay us what they owe to those who actually have the forethought to take out the insurance. All this giveaway stuff is going to break the best of us.

Anyway, tight lines to all, and pray the wind gives up a little to make it nicer to fish. Grouper season is right around the corner. YIPPEE!



If you missed the Northernmost Big Pine event of the year you surely missed out. All of Port Pine Height’s elite society were there to enjoy Gary and Ursala’s tender roasted chicken. Gary has been roasting chicken for years on this contraption and if you didn’t think it could be better than last year’s you’d be mistaken.

I can tell when most tourists and snowbirds are gone. The MCSO arrest pages of pics get shorter.

What has happened to Linda’s Bait Shack?  We have been trying to buy their chum and it is always closed.  No sign on the door.  Phone mail box is full.  Does anyone know where else we can buy Black Pearl Chum? 

you and me14

Here is the jingle song I promised I would send you. The artist is Bridget leigh, my daughter, the writer is Cory Young, your own local Marathon City Marina resident. Please see what you think of it and use it for your web site if you like. I will let Cory know if you decide it is something you can use to promote the Keys. YOU AND ME MP3 4_13

Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email.  
The Iron Lady, Margaret Thatcher is dead. Rust in Peace!

launch14[First Shuttle Launch] A new era in space flight began on April 12, 1981, when Space Shuttle Columbia, or STS-1, soared into orbit from NASA’s Kennedy Space Center in Florida.

Astronaut John Young, a veteran of four previous space flights including a walk on the moon in 1972, commanded the mission. Navy test pilot Bob Crippen piloted the mission and would go on to command three future shuttle missions. The shuttle was humankind’s first re-usable spacecraft. The orbiter would launch like a rocket and land like a plane. The two solid rocket boosters that helped push them into space would also be re-used, after being recovered in the ocean. Only the massive external fuel tank would burn up as it fell back to Earth. It was all known as the Space Transportation System. Link

Best International Stage Magicians – “The Twins”. The most amazing stage magic ever – sawing a woman in half using clear see-through boxes. Link




Ivory seizures abound the world.

Derer Ed, During your layoff did you reflect on your tenure here and come to any conclusions about what you have unleashed?


Green Acres tribute to the electrifiers of NNK. Link 

Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email.  




Day by day this weekend, the waxing crescent Moon marches up past stars and bright Jupiter. (The Moon is shown positioned for the middle of North America. For Europe, move each Moon symbol a quarter of the way toward the one for the previous date.) 

automatic ct

[Getting Old] I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist in town. I noticed his DDS diploma hanging on the wall, which bore his full name. Suddenly I remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 30-odd years ago. Could he be the same guy that I had a secret crush on way back then? Upon seeing him, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate. After he examined my teeth, I couldn’t resist so I asked him if he had attended Morgan High School.  

“Yes, yes, I did,” he gleamed with pride.  

“When did you graduate?” I asked.  

He answered, “In 1975. Why do you ask?'”

“You were in my class!” I exclaimed.  He looked at me closely. Then, that mean, ugly, old, bald, wrinkled, fat, gray-haired, rude idiot asked, “Oh, What did you teach?” 

leagb2[Canals] How can the county even consider spending Five Million dollars for restoration of canals in Monroe county?  The majority of the residents on the canal I live on do not care what happens to their canal until it is no longer usable.  Most of the people with leaf blowers use these pieces of equipment to blow whatever is on their lots into the canal.  If the debris is to heavy for the leaf blower to get it into the canal just give it a kick or pick it up and throw it in.  This needs to be fixed first.

Animal factory. Factory or torture? Those poor critters. Link


Bathroom finder. The most important link i ever sent out! Link



Chuck will sort this out! Every other week N. Korea threatens to blow up the world.

Crazy man Maud Frigget, I mean Johnathan Winters is dead too. 


Bill Maher trashes the libertarians and Paul Ryan. Link

an head explode2



Well who didn’t see this coming? 14 days without an outlet to vent on was just too much for FTR guy.

Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email. 


right only grey

an beggar monkeyWhile our Deer Ed was vacationing in a swanky resort sitting around the pool slurping cool adult beverage, and leering at his nubile fellow pool plungers, big things were happening. On Friday, the 5th Team Obama’s Bureau of Labor Statistics released the employment numbers for March.  It wasn’t pretty. It was scary!

Some folks might crow that the unemployment rate declined to 7.6%. That rate is absolutely horrifying especially when you look just a little further.

In March we only added about 88k jobs. That’s about half of what was predicted.  And it’s only about a third of the number of new jobs added in February. It only gets worse from there. First we must realize that we need about 250k new jobs created each month to even begin to bring us out of this malaise. Second, the 88k increase was the lowest number of new jobs created since June of ’12.

The 88k new jobs does not even keep up with population growth. There were far fewer persons with jobs in March than there were in Jan or Feb, we are going backwards. The abysmal fact is that in March are about 2.7 million fewer Americans with jobs than there were in January 2007.

The rate declined only because of the massive number of people who have quit looking for work.  That number exploded to nearly 90 million. It’s astounding but 663k more persons just quit looking for work in March. March was a bad news record breaker. More people quit the labor force last month than in any single month in our history. By the end of March the total number of persons who have quit the labor force was at a record high.  Maybe, just maybe that is part of the reason that food stamps, disability claims, and welfare is through the roof.

Some people who are of the liberal persuasion have tried to blame the horrid jobs number for February on sequestration.  They really shouldn’t because that’s just not true, and the whole thing was Obama’s idea in the first place. Sequestration did not become effective until March 1. The effects of it have not had enough time to impact the economy. In fact the unemployment rate for federal workers is about half of the rate of other workers. The public is not spending on retail items. Business owners are not hiring, they are cutting work force. For the first time since June ’12, the retail sector is actually shedding jobs. The loss last month was huge, there were 20k jobs lost.  Employers are shedding jobs for two reasons. First sales are down because retail customers are reacting to the recent tax increase and they are reacting to the increased costs of health care caused by Obamacare. Second employers are insulating themselves from the added costs of Obama care. Many employers are shifting employees from full time to part time. Many employers are reducing their work force so as to be under the 50 employee Obamacare threshold.

In February purchases of newly built homes fell 4.6 per cent to a 411,000 annualized pace, following a 431,000 rate in the prior month that was lower than previously estimated. New homes are the economic driver, not re-sales.

Consumers are already spending less in MacDonald’s and Walmart this year. That’s hardly a bullish signal.

And yet, the stock market soars. Why? The fabulous market recovery is a product of the Fed printing money and artificially low interest rates. The real economy is flat on its back, and consumers have little confidence that it will soon improve. Deer Friends that is not my opinion or judgment.  The Conference Board Consumer Confidence Index®, which had improved in February, declined in March. The Index now stands at 59.7 (1985=100), down from 68.0 in February. The Present Situation Index decreased to 57.9 from 61.4. The Expectations Index declined to 60.9 from 72.4 last month.

an money toiletPart 2) Certainly we all remember the great sucking sound of money going down the drain that was Team Obama’s “stimulus” program. We were told that the stimulus program would create thousands of jobs thus ending the economic mess that we still endure. After spending about a trillion tax dollars unemployment still runs rampant.  It’s tragic, but our current situation has become the new norm. Does anyone remember when the unemployment rate was under 5%? We still are paying the bill for Obama’s folly. We saw long tons of money wasted on so called green enterprises. Many, if not most, went bankrupt and created few if any new jobs.

Not too many people have heard of one very interesting and stimulating program funded by stimulus money. The details of a stimulus grant awarded to Indiana University to study condom use have now been released on a government website. The study, titled “Barriers to Correct Condom Use,” is now completed, according to the website, and the university received $423,500 of stimulus funds to perform the study. Think about that, somewhere in Team Obama, someone felt that studying rubbers would add jobs. We were assured that the stimulus dollars were spent to create jobs.  This silliness created not a single job. But the condom project did disprove that old saying “If you build it they will come”.