The un-social media since 2002 with 60,000 followers.
Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage pick-up days,
Tuesdays and Fridays.
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 [Only in America] I In response to a conservative backlash to Bud Light’s use of a trans woman in an online marketing campaign, the beer company is introducing a military-themed bottle decorated with camouflage. With sales of Bud Light down 24 percent, Anheuser-Busch will feature the word “America” instead of “Budweiser” on the special-edition aluminum bottle, which is imprinted with lyrics from “The Star-Spangled Banner.” |
| [“Peasant shacks for the useless”] Jesus was born in a barn. He was a King. |
 [“Movies”] Another quirky thing for movies would be to have the hero’s junker car have the broken windshield wipers always on instead of the usual hard start or backfiring or door not opening properly. |
| [Social Media Tragedy] Because of social media’s lies, 319,000 people died from Covid. These victims of social media’s anti vaccine campaign and hysteria caused people to fear the vaccines causing their deaths. They all could have lived if they believed the CDC, Anthony Fauci and all major medical institutions. Instead, they believed fake news, a corrupt President, quack “doctors” and died. Link |
[Big Ass] I used to date a chick this big when I was in high school. At least she ate like this one. Her name was Tinasaurass |
| [“Saint Pedophile”] It’s no wonder the Catholic Church didn’t report serial sexual abusers but moved them from parish to parish for fresh meat. Wake up believers, you have perverts investigating other perverts. Young virginal men cloistered together will invariable be attracted to other young men or boys. The Catholic church has an endless supply of young boys. Why is that? As a young man, I wouldn’t want to be stuck in a closet with a priest. The Church could stop the problem if they really wanted to by allowing priests to marry. Their god never said that woman can’t be part of the Church, or that priests can’t marry. That’s a rule made by men; don’t you wonder why? |
[Baby Shower Gift] No matter how well it’s wrapped or how heartfelt the purchase was, it was brought to my attention yesterday that a home paternity test is not an appropriate baby shower gift. I know that now |
| [Safe America] 59% of Americans believe a mass shooting in their community is very or somewhat likely. |
 [ls Censorship Growing] Yes. A record 2,571 different titles were banned or censored by school districts in 2022. Most of the targeted books were by or about racial minorities or LGBTQ people. Broad, vaguely defined prohibitions on teaching “critical race theory” and other allegedly divisive topics. A textbook publisher even had to completely remove a purely factual passage on George Floyd’s murder and the subsequent Black Lives Matter protests. In at least a half-dozen states, teachers and school librarians now face potential prison time for violating the bans.In Missouri, a new law banning books containing “explicit sexual material” led school districts to junk art history textbooks and nonfiction accounts of the Holocaust. In Texas, which had more book bannings than any other state last year, a bill currently under consideration would ban textbooks that portray U.S. history in anything but a “positive” light. In Florida, new laws pushed by Gov. Ron DeSantis have tied educators in knots and emptied some school library shelves. In Bradenton and Jacksonville, administrators ordered the removal or concealment of tens of thousands of books in their schools. One textbook publisher even eliminated any mention of race in telling the story of Rosa Parks refusing to change her seat on a public bus. “Tip lines” now exist for reporting teachers who discuss “inappropriate” topics. One teacher said. “It feels very much like 1984 or the McCarthy era.” |
[Chemicals in Waters] $1.2 billion settlement still does not clean up the waters. Link |
| [Safe Schools] Last year there were 273 people killed or wounded on school grounds. |
 [Methane] We shouldn’t demonize cows for burping and farting; we should be thanking them. Link |
| [27 not 26] No, I don’t believe we have all heard of rock stars dying at age 26. This is because 27 is the infamous age at which many have died-that we have all heard of–minus you. |
If your electric vehicle gets struck by lightning, is that like getting a free tank of gas? |
| [“Billion dollar system”] The main reason I sold and moved. I had the top-of-the-line State mandated and approved aerobic system which cost appx $15,000. Then see these fools who obviously did not know what they were doing, after seeing what happened in Marathon, told us we had to pay thousands of dollars to shut it down and allow FKAA to takeover some of property – plus the fact that we would be charged for the same volume of water in as having to go back to treatment facility (the big s-hole on Cudjoe) when a large amount of the water coming in didn’t go back down the drain. Total thievery! All of this shoved upon us for the “sake of keeping our waters free of septic leaks.” Also, the pipes made of rubber were already leaking all along the route to the treatment facilities before most of area was hooked up. What a crock of you know what. So glad I got out of there. The Keys used to be such a beautiful, peaceful, low-key place. All ruined by realtors and developers – who are mostly in both forms of business or combined with the all-powerful tourist Industry. A total shame such a beautiful place is now destroyed by greed. |
 [Why You Should Sleep Naked] Love it or hate it, sleeping naked is different. Not only is it less laundry to wash, but taking off those pajamas can do wonders for your health. While you may feel self-conscious at first, the openness of resting in the nude can actually boost your confidence and help you look your best self. There’s no right or wrong way to get ready for bed—it’s all a matter of preference. And while nakedness won’t miraculously cure all your sleep problems, experts say there are some modest benefits to going au naturel. Link |
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 [Sleight of Hand] The Marathon City commission used over $1,000,000 of the infrastructure sales tax money voted by the people for a complete and fully funded sewer system and gave it to the State of Florida to partially repair the state owned 7-mile bridge, which just so happens to be Marathons #1 tourist attraction. And we don’t trust the Government. Do you wonder why? |
 [Corn Snake] On Wednesday I removed the cushions from the easy chair on the porch and there was a corn snake! AaaaaH! I got my welding gauntlet gloves and kitchen tongs and tonged it and threw it over the porch. I should have taken a picture, but I was in a state of panic and my wife was screaming and jumping around (me too). The snake was about the diameter of a fat pencil and 2 feet long. |
 Remember linoleum? When growing up every apartment I rented had it and I would just buy another piece and lay it over the old, crappy piece. Sometimes there were 3 layers of it on the kitchen floor of the crappy places I could afford. I don’t know if they even sell it anymore. Link |
| The best cure for tinnitus (ringing in ears) is to answer the phone! |
[Gag Me With a Spoon Department] Blue whales have 7 gallons of sperm. |
| To spend 1 trillion dollars in 30 years, you would need 10 spend approximately $91,224,200.91 per day. |
I take home Covid test, and read the box “Manufacture Sunnyvale Ca, made in China” |
| [Milking The Herd] If you’re wondering why the religious fools spend so much time trying to convince us morons that taxing the rich is bad for America, here’s why. Pastors Net Worth Kenneth Copeland: -$300 million Joel Osteen: -$100 million Benny Hinn: -560 million Steven Furtick: -$55 million Andy Stanley: -$50 million Bill Hybels: -$45 million Rick Warren: -$25 million Bishop T.D. Jokes: -S20 million John MacArthur: -$14 million Franklin Graham: —$‘l0 million Jock Graham: -S10 mlliion John Hogee: -S5 million Bishop Noel Jones: $5 million Paula White: -S5 million Joyce Meyer: $55 million Matt Chandler: -$5 million Mark Driscoll: -$3 million Tm Keller: -$3 million Shane Claiborne: -$1.5 million |
| [Censorship] The Davis School District near Salt Lake City has banned the Bible from elementary and middle school classrooms after a parent complained some verses were too vulgar or violent for children. The district says it has a pending complaint about The Book of Mormon. |
Why don’t birds fart? |
| I am starting to think that I will never be old enough to know better. |
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| The current Coconut Telegraph was published on 6/5/23 at 7:22 am. |