The un-social media since 2002 with 60,000 followers.
Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage pick-up days,
Tuesdays and Fridays.
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| [Passwords] A good way to “remember” your password. Here is my name written in long pushes on my phone: )[<>@÷×[od I could use the name of my company. I could add upper and lower case letters if needed. And a number, maybe my age, or maybe just a zero. You have to be consistent with the additions or you’ll get them mixed up. Then any time I need my password I won’t have to look it up. Hey, wait! I can’t use this password because you know my password now! |
Have you ever had your socks knocked off? (I’ve had mine gently and politely removed, but not actually knocked off.) |
| [1692 Glaucoma Cure] She needed to beat together the pigeon dung with the yolks six eggs for Mr. Park’s glaucoma and the distilled plague water. |
 [Electric Corvette] The new electrified E-Ray is the quickest Corvette ever. The car’s smart software knows exactly how to employ the Vette’s new electric motor. Here’s how it all works. Link |
| I installed the Temu shopping app on my phone and now I get a new notice every few minutes on whatever app I am using! I quickly uninstalled it. |
Stop killing the planet with plastic water bottles. |
| [Voicemail Etiquette] Why do so many people have voicemail on their cell phone and don’t return your call? You leave the requested message. Eventually they notice that you called and they return your call. You ask them, “So, do you want to go?” They respond, “Huh? Go where? What?” “Duh! I left a long message. “Oh, I saw you called so I called you back, didn’t listen to message. |
[If Toenails Could Talk] Why are my toenails that color? Link |
| [Friday Joke] When NASA was preparing for the Apollo project, some of the training of the astronauts took place on a Navajo reservation. One day, a Navajo elder and his son were herding sheep and came across the space crew. The old man, who spoke only Navajo, asked a question that his son translated. “What are these guys in the big suits doing?” A member of the crew said they were practicing for their trip to the moon. The old man got all excited and asked if he could send a message to the moon with the astronauts. Recognizing a promotional opportunity, the NASA folks found a tape recorder. After the old man recorded his message, they asked his son to translate it. He refused. The NASA PR people brought the tape to the reservation, where the rest of the tribe listened and laughed, but refused to translate the elder’s message. Finally, the NASA crew called in an official government translator. His translation of the old man’s message was: “Watch out for these guys; they have come to steal your land.” |
 [Big Pine Book Club] For October 21st (third Saturday of the month) we will discuss Remarkably Bright Creatures by Shelby Van Pelt.After Tova Sullivan’s husband died, she began working the night shift at the Sowell Bay Aquarium, mopping floors and tidying up. Keeping busy has always helped her cope, which she’s been doing since her eighteen-year-old son, Erik, mysteriously vanished on a boat in Puget Sound over thirty years ago. Tova becomes acquainted with curmudgeonly Marcellus, a giant Pacific octopus living at the aquarium. Marcellus knows more than anyone can imagine but wouldn’t dream of lifting one of his eight arms for his human captors—until he forms a remarkable friendship with Tova. Ever the detective, Marcellus deduces what happened the night Tova’s son disappeared. And now Marcellus must use every trick his old invertebrate body can muster to unearth the truth for her before it’s too late. Full Menu > Ongoing Events > Book Club |
| [Huge Plot Hole In Reality] Every person carries around a device with access to the totality of human knowledge and yet people are constantly wrong about everything. |
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| Bullying is one of the most concerning things your child can experience. With the advancement of technology and almost everything done online, cyberbullying has become parents and their children’s worst nightmares. The worst part of it all isn’t the act of bullying but the long-term effect it will cause—imagine a child questioning their self-worth, crying out of self-pity, and believing that there’s something wrong with them. Link |
[Naked Men And Women Unite!] KW mayor Johnston wants to do away with Fantasy Fest. Old KW is going to be a thing of the past. |
| [Friday Joke] Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter. 10 men and 1 woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one had to leave because otherwise they were all going to fall. They weren’t able to choose that person until the woman gave a very touching speech. She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because, as a woman she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids or for men in general, and was used to always making sacrifices with little in return. As soon as she finished her speech all the men started clapping. |
 [Gaza Support] Tens of thousands support Palestinians. No Western news channel reported this mass rally. Is it because American Jews control the media? Thousands of Iraqis pour onto Tahrir Square in Baghdad in support of Palestinians amid Israeli air strikes on Gaza in reprisal for a surprise Hamas attack. Video |
| [“Bigot alert”] I’m always amazed at how much hate and misunderstanding there is. All you need is love – The Beatles |
 Worker: I will be late for work today. There is a Cat on my car roof. Have to take the bus.Boss: You can’t just come in late because you don’t want to bother a damn cat. Just get rid of it. Worker: I’m afraid I won’t be able to. Boss: What ls more Important? Your job or a damn animal? |
| [Isaksen Insurance] You can now manage your insurance online. You can View policies, Print ID cards, Request Certificates, Request changes, Update your information, Share policy documents. Manage your account. |
 Voting by mail is a convenient and secure way to ensure your participation in our democracy. By signing up for vote-by-mail, you can cast your ballot from the comfort of your home, eliminating the need to wait in long lines at polling stations. It’s a safe option, especially during uncertain times, as it allows you to vote without leaving your house. Vote-by-mail requests must now be renewed every two years. Click here to sign up for vote-by-mail. |
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Coral researchers see ‘mass mortality’ amid Florida Keys reef bleaching crisis. Link |
| [“Bigot alert”] Very sad post. Thanks though for alerting us that bigots are still alive and “not” well (sick), in the Keys. |
 I bought the best flashlight ever for $12 on Amazon. It doesn’t have a bulb to break or burn out. It has a computer chip instead of a bulb. It is the brightest light I have ever had at 2000 Lumen. I can use it as a bright flood light or zoom and identify cars ¼ mile away down my road. It’s aluminum and rechargeable. No more batteries. The only thing I don’t like is the multi-function switch. It takes 4 pushes of the button to turn it off. I hate multi-function switches. This is more powerful than my too-big 3 D-cell tactical flashlight. I just bought another one! Video |
| Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country. ~Hermann Goering, German military commander and Hitler’s designated successor. Postcards from a police state – 22 years of blow back from the USA Patriot Act. Link |
 [Idea Juice] I was drinking with my buddy Roger down at the VFW last night and he’s thinking of starting a business and has narrowed it down to one of these two:~A store that sells scented candles specifically for the bathroom called John Wicks. ~A vibrator maintenance repair service called Inspect Her Gadget. They both sounded pretty good after 6 or 7 beers. This morning, not so much. |
| The current Coconut Telegraph was published on 10/20/23 at 8:42 am. |