2023 December

Tuesday, December 26, 2023

The un-social media since 2002 with 60,000 followers.
Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage pick-up days,
Tuesdays and Fridays.

Submit a post  Contact Us
Dear Santa…
I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. Iv ben a gud boy all yeer.
Yer Frend,
BiLLyDear Billy,
Nice spelling. You’re on your way to a career in lawn care. How about I
send you a frigging book so you can learn to read and write? I’m giving
your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell!

Dear Santa,
I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I ask for is peace and
joy in the world for everybody!

Dear Sarah,
Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn’t they?

Dear Santa,
I don’t know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I’d like for my mommy
and daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do.

Dear Teddy,
Look, your dad’s banging the babysitter like a screen door in a hurricane.
Do you think he’s gonna give that up to come back to your frigid, fat mom,
who rides his ass constantly? It’s time to give up that dream. Let me get
you some nice Legos instead. Maybe you can build yourself a family with

Dear Santa,
I want a new bike, a Playstation, a train, some G.I. Joes, a dog, a drum
kit, a pony and a tuba.

Dear Francis,
Who names their kid “Francis” nowadays? I bet you’re gay.

[Fake Photos] Since Google’s introduction of its Pixel 8 phones earlier this month, it has been interesting and a little amusing to me to read the reactions to its image manipulation tools. It feels like we have been asking the same questions every year — questions like what is a photograph, anyway?, and has technology gone too far? — since Google went all-in on computational photography with its original Pixels in 2016. In fact, these are things which people have been asking about photography since its early development. Arguments about Google’s complicity in fakery seem to be missing some historical context. Which means, unfortunately, a thousand-word summary. Link

[Christmas Dinner] I was reading a book I got for Christmas while the turkey was cooking. After a few hours I went to the kitchen to see if it was done. Oh no! The turkey was on top of the stove—I forgot to put it in the oven. We didn’t eat until 9pm and everyone was cranky.
[Performing Productivity at Google] It’s become apparent that they aren’t as productive as we’ve been told to think. Ex-Meta employee Madelyn Machado recently posted a TikTok video claiming that she was getting paid $190,000 a year to do nothing. Another Meta employee, also on TikTok, posted that “Meta was hiring people so that other companies couldn’t have us, and then they were just kind of like hoarding us like Pokémon cards.” Over at Google, a company known to have pioneered the modern tech workplace, one designer complained of spending 40 percent of their time on “the inefficien[cy] overhead of simply working at Google.” Some report spending all day on tasks as simple as changing the color of a website button. Working the bare minimum while waiting for stock to vest is so common that Googlers call it “resting and vesting.” Link


[Stale Pie] Man has eaten a frozen mince pie made by his late mom every Christmas for last 21 years. Link

[The places you can’t visit in 2024] This year was all about making up for lost time. Following the pandemic, visitors flooded Europe’s biggest cities and America’s national parks as a form of “revenge travel,” going to – or returning to – some of the destinations that had been inaccessible during the Covid-19 pandemic. However, the world has changed a lot since the pandemic’s onset. Many businesses closed as people transitioned to working remotely and not every tourist attraction survived the period unscathed. Link
Electronic soil boosts crop growth by over 50%. In an era where food security is becoming increasingly challenging, a fascinating study from Linköping University offers a beacon of hope. This research introduces an innovative approach to soilless cultivation, or hydroponics, by integrating an electrically conductive cultivation substrate, aptly named “electronic soil” or eSoil. Link
[Skewering Facts] One of the first questions anyone asks about past societies is, ‘how many people were there?’ It is one of those basic bits of information and generally speaking those of us who teach these societies are usually prepared with an estimate to answer the question. But what we often don’t talk about is how we come to those estimates or how reliable they are and that can lead to an excessive amount of confidence in estimates that are often deeply uncertain – especially when those estimates get used by other disciplines and scholars who seem unaware or uncaring as to how thin their evidentiary support is. Link

Boxing Day shoppers expected to spend £3.7bn, a big drop on last year. Some big retailers stay shut as Black Friday overshadows traditional sales and people watch their budgets. Link
[Captain Doom and Gloom] NCIS got it right when Gibbs head smacks his agents for screwing up something. This should be done to today’s kids and wives too! Maybe it would bring manhood back to castrated American men.


[Can I Pet The Dog] This cracks me up every time it comes around. Video

Gas in Florida just went up 16 cents a gallon. What’s next for prices at the pump? Link


Merry Christmas Ed, thanks for the C.T. you provide all year.

How to use your phone as a hotspot without blowing through all your data. Computers can be real data hogs, but these tips can help slow their potentially costly consumption. Link
The hidden Christmas reference on a Rolling Stones album: Their Satanic Majesties Request. it’s (allegedly) Bill Wyman saying: “We wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas, and a happy new year!” in a voice that’s slowed down so as to come out unintelligible. Due to the yuletide message, the ending soon became known as ‘Cosmic Christmas’, which was the original title for the album. Link


A great site for recipes that taste good. Link

Before we work on artificial intelligence why don’t we do something about natural stupidity?
Submit a post  Contact Us
The current Coconut Telegraph was published on 12/26/23 at 7:35 am.