2023 April

Friday, April 14, 2023

The un-social media since 2002 with 60,000 followers.
Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage pick-up days,
Tuesdays and Fridays.

Submit a post  Contact Us
[Obese] Tiredness and needing to urinate more are two of the most common signs of diabetes. Around nine in 10 cases of diabetes are type 2 diabetes, which is often linked to being overweight or inactive and can be cured if you get off your ass, change your diet and exercise
[Live and Let Live] I never cared if you were “gay” or whatever acronym you chose to call yourself, until you started wanting special privileges.
I never cared what color your skin was, until you started blaming me for your problems.
I never cared about your political affiliation, until you started to condemn me for mine.

While watching Swamp People on TV I wondered if Troy or Little Willy ever fall in the water while catching gators.

[?] What happened to Key West’s The Blue Paper? Link
There was an explosion and fire in Dimmitt, Texas and 18,000 cows were killed. So jump on your pony pardner and come on down, hop on the bus, Gus for some great BBQ at the planets biggest BBQ. Texas does everything big!
[Transgender] Are certain reptiles like lizards and frogs able to impregnate themselves if there’s no opposite sex around?
I’m curious. If we arm every teacher and put former military members in every school, who’s responsible if they miss their target and shoot someone else? I had an expert rifle ranking in the military and when tested I had to get 75 hits for that qualification out of 100. That means 25 missed the targets. Will the person that shoots an unarmed person be charged with murder? Who will be liable for medical bills, the person or the school?
California Drought: Tulare Lake is reborn due to record wet winter. Tulare Lake, which used to be the largest freshwater lake west of the Mississippi River, is filling for the first time since 1997. Video
[Booster Shot] I was laid up all day yesterday, the day after getting the Covid booster shot. It felt like all my strength was sapped and my head filled with paper towels. All I could do was nap. My arm is still sore from the jab.
[Gay Beer] New York Post: Beer colossus Anheuser-Busch saw its value plummet more than $5 billion since the company announced its branding partnership with controversial transgender social media influencer Dylan Mulvaney. Since March 31, shares of Bud Light’s parent company have fallen by nearly 4%. Budweiser sales & delivery personnel should find new employment.
Oh look, It’s a man in a dress telling stories to children. Why is that little girl sitting on that man’s lap?
Some mornings I wake up Grumpy but most mornings I just let her sleep.

Farewell to the ‘mother of the miniskirt. Dame Mary Quant dies at 93. Link

You know, I seriously think lots of people are hoping for WW3 just to break the monotony of their daily boring lives. Especially young people who don’t know much of the world nor pain. Viewing lots of web site feedback and commercial comments, I see dreamers living like movie actors, playing the parts they have been indoctrinated with, and not knowing how they have been brainwashed. This is the same playbook that was used in WW1 and WW2 and all other money making profiteer wars throughout history. We are being had again.

Deadliest dairy barn fire in TX killed 18,000 cows Monday. Farm explosion kills 18,000 cows. Did their farts explode? Link

[Exercise] Back in the day, people didn’t exercise because telephone cords were only 6-8 ft long unless you bought an extra-long one. Nowadays, thanks to the invention of the battery powered cell phone, people can talk, look at baby pictures, etc, and walk to Starbucks for latte and barrel sized pastries.
If Edward Snowden is now a Russian citizen, will he be drafted to fight against the Ukrainians?
[“Prayer solves gun violence”] Duh! As if no one has prayed to end gun violence. Get your head out of your bible and confiscate the guns. Praying to mythical gods hasn’t worked, confiscation will.

Nobody is above suspicion.

[Computer Progress] Remember just a few years ago you’d have to wait a half minute for a picture to load?

“F**k” and the less popular “shit” are the two most popular expressions of exasperation. They are the go-to grunts most people make worldwide.

[Crooks] Dozens of checks stolen from the mail. Florida Keys sheriff suspects it’s an inside job. Link
Why do all humans scream the same scream when speeding down a roller coaster? Is it involuntary?
[Friday Joke] I used to run a dating service for chickens, but I was struggling to make hens meet.

[Inflation] Helmann’s Real mayonnaise is now $9.59 a quart. Ten dollars for a jar a mayo!

Interactive map. Select countries you visited. Link

[Captain Doom and Gloom] All this talk about baby boxes is bs. Just go and get sterilized and be done with it! If you’re that stupid to get knocked up, you should be fixed.
[“Duck and cover drills”] I remember them in grade school, hunkering under our desks. Even at that young age I figured the desks must be made out of something magical to stop an atom bomb
[Movies] Every movie now has at least one drone shot.

“Something has to be done about this Left-Wing Commie web site!”

[Friday Joke] The true story or fake news. The day after his election victory, President-elect Donald Trump met with President Obama in the Oval Office of the White House. After drinking several glasses of beer, he asked Obama if he could use his personal bathroom. He was astonished to see that the President had a solid gold urinal. That afternoon, Trump told Melania, about the urinal. “Just think,” he said,” when I move in, I’ll get to have a gold urinal!”
Later, when Melania had lunch with Michelle Obama, she told Michelle how impressed Donny had been with his discovery of a gold urinal in the President’s private bathroom.
That evening, Barack and Michelle were getting ready for bed. Michelle turned to Barack and said, “Guess who peed in your saxophone?”
The current Coconut Telegraph was published on 4/14/23 at 8:30 am.