2015 January

Friday, January 23, 2015

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The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsSince 2002. Anonymous Letters to the Editor with pictures. Published Monday through Friday by Noon.

eye-witness23 [Conspiracy Theory] Some of you will believe any crackpot writer. I had a friend in the Navy stationed at the Navy Annex on a rise above and west of the Pentagon. He was outside smoking a cigarette when the plane went right over his head into the Pentagon.
Hard disk failure. A geek’s must-read! Link
bicyclist lycra
[‘Refuses to use bike path“] It seems like the Lance Armstrong Lycra bicycle riders are more concerned about working on their cardio than getting run over by a person driving and texting or drinking on US 1. Oh well, it is better to look good than to feel good. And those outfits are so pretty.
9/11] They have 4 planes missing, how else can that happen unless United and American were part of the conspiracy? So under the conspiracy that United or American didn’t slam into the WTC or Pentagon, which airline employee conspirator is going to take the hit with FAA for filing a false Statement (18 USC 1001) and subsequent lies. There is a paper trail signature for every required step with a human being (witness) getting the necessary paperwork.
The King is dead
, Long live the King! King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia died of old age at 90 and will be replaced by his kid brother who is only 80. Link
[More bar wisdom] Until you’ve tried to start a conga line at a funeral, don’t tell me about your drinking problem.
[Joke Friday] Pat and Mike were the best of friends, They hung around together, they worked together. They lived together, they drank together. Pat got sick and was dying, he knew he was dying. He said to his lifelong friend Mike “Mike I’m dying will you do me one favor? “Sure” Mike says, “anything”. Pat says “I have this bottle of Jameson’s here, our favorite whiskey, will you pour it on my grave when I’m gone?” “Sure” Mike says.
Pat passes away and Mike brings the bottle of whiskey to the funeral. He waits at the grave till all the mourners are gone. He takes out the bottle and looks at the grave, he looks at the bottle and then down at the grave again and says “Pat, do you mind if I pass this through my kidneys first?”
[Softie] I don’t understand all the complaining about the football being under inflated at the Patriots game.  Weren’t both teams using the same ball?
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touch screen23
Never try to clean your touch screen while it is on or else you might wipe everything off your hard drive. I did!
Free Florida Keys Health Fair. Link
[Big Kahuna Contest] The Good Health Clinic would like to announce the kick of the 4th Annual Big Kahuna Contest!  The Big Kahuna Contest is a competitive fundraising event in which nominated community members use their resources and creativity to raise money in support of The Good Health Clinic.The 2015 Big Kahuna nominees are: Roger Young of Islamorada Brick Company, Jay Frins of ASAP Construction, Dirk Smits, Esq., partner with the Law offices of Vernis and Bowling, and Rob Stober, Esq. partner with the law offices of Hershoff, Lupino, and Yagel. You can support these Kahunas by purchasing Sponsorships from them, buying tickets to the Beach Luau event, attending their individual hosted events, or giving cash donations in their name.  The Last Big Kahuna winner, Vicki Walker of Centennial Bank, raised over $16,000!The Big Kahuna Contest will conclude with the award ceremony during the 4th Annual Beach Luau hosted by the Good Health Clinic.  The Luau will be held on February 28th at the Island Grill North in Key Largo MM 97. The Luau will feature a feast, bar, silent auction, and great entertainment, including a live volcano!  This event is open to the public and tickets are $75 per person, with VIP tables of 10 available for $1000.  Tickets may be purchased at Island Grill South, either FreeWheeler Realty locations or online by visiting the Good Health Clinic Facebook page. Events
TireCodeNumbersWhoever gets these 2 free Goodyear tires with 75% tread left should check the date code on the tires. All tires have an expiration date. You can find it on the tire in a oblong circle with four numbers. The first two are the week of the year the tires were manufactured, and the last two are the year. In my experience free is usually not free, but good luck.
[Unions] Key West city workers’ union got a 2% pay increase for them.  How much did your union get for you?
preacher bibleAny interpretation of Apocalypse or the end of times Biblical prophecy inevitably has an axe to grind for its own brand of faith. A series of presentations on “Islam & Christianity in Bible Prophecy” by an SDA (Seventh Day Adventists) preacher from Keene, TX received some pushback in Key West, FL, even before he was fully heard. This much was to be expected, as folks are suspicious of the true intentions behind such religious diatribe. What is the real aim of these merchants of dreams: attempt to gain converts, donations to the religious cause, exposing eschatology of mainstream religions or just self-aggrandizing with the aid of an old, worn out prophecy line? I hoped this pastor would also have had the guts to delve into subjects such as usury and blasphemy in mainline religions and to put it in a historical context. Unfortunately, he chose the easy way out and stuck to the prophecy line.
The many uses for coconut oil. Link
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tire wheel[“Free tires“] I’m trying to contact the person who was generously giving away the two used tires yesterday. Their phone immediately goes to a message stating that they cannot accept messages. If the tires are still available, please call me  (305) 872-3407
Conspiracy theories are just science for dummies. Read the appropriately titled, How Not To Suck. The nut jobs won’t read it. But it wasn’t meant for them. Normal people deserve to see reasoned answers so they don’t start questioning their own common sense. That’s where the crazy starts.  Link
hareens 12.2.14
[Unions] Anyone see a correlation between the decline in union membership, from 40% of workers a while back down to10% today, and the so called wage stagnation in this country?
virus23[Virus] FKAA’s email system got a virus that aautomaticallysends to addresses it finds. If you have had email contact with FKAA, watch out! Do not open an FKAA message that claims to be a fax. If it got through FKAA’s security screening, it is probably all over the place, so you may get it from another company or individual. The fax is supposedly contained in an attachment, but it contains a virus. The one I received had a subject line “You have received a new fax”
Paper is not dead! Ha. Video
flea market23The Big Pine Flea Market is this weekend. All the venders are there. Go early and see all your friends.
Massive Times Square billboard to show video of WTC 7 destruction during 9/11 anniversary. Link
[Phishing] Hello,
I really don’t want to disturb you about this but I had no one else to turn to. I’m in ukraine to see my cousin who lives here. she’s critically ill and needs family support. She is diagnosed with (Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia) – a type of Blood Cancer in 2005 and she had been undergoing treatment since. The chemotherapy treatment was going fine until last week when the doctor noticed that the disease has relapsed and the only way she can survive is by undergoing a BMT (Bone Marrow Transplantation). My sister whose marrow matched she has agreed to be the donor and she will be undergoing the transplant soon at the Salvator Mundi International Hospital here in Kharkov . The estimate for the transplant is $8,000 USD. I have already spent approx. $5,200 USD towards her treatment. Since the amount is huge, I request you to lend out a helping hand and support me with a loan of $2,800 USD. Since I don’t know your financial status at the moment, any kind of help whatsoever will be deeply appreciated. Your help and support will give her a chance to live a normal life once again. There is nothing called a small help when the heart giving it is big. Any amount will be accepted with gratitude and paid back after the surgery. Please let me know how much you can loan me so that i can provide you with the details to get the money to me and, I will pay back as soon as I return.
Thanks for your help
downrigger23[Fishing Downriggers For Sale] One Riveria downrigger with 30″ pole, manual, with cable, no depth counter. Used but in good condition, pickup in Big Pine. Asking $30 or best offer. 614-886-0904..Two Mac-Jac downriggers with 40″ pole, manual, cable and has depth counter. Used but in good condition. Pickup in Big Pine. Asking $40 each or best offer. 614-886-0904     1.23.15. Classified Ads > Boats
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moslim praying[Islam] Down the street from me in the Florida Keys lived a Muslim family from Bangladesh. I invited the head of the household in one day to talk about events of the day. Hanging on the wall by the table where we sat in my living room was a tapestry I kept since 1959 and that depicted the Kasbah area where I lived as a kid for a couple of years in Tunis. When he saw the minarets, he really opened up to lambaste President Bush for killing Muslims in Iraq. I listened politely until I escorted him to the driveway where I gave him my somber assessment. Islam is not a religion as much as it is a cult that is at war with everybody else. He knew he was found and left with the tail between his legs.
He certainly was not about to confirm what was the center of gravity of Islam as a whole, though I suspect every good Muslim fully knows. It is about Al Quds, also known as Jerusalem. The golden dome mosque that now sits atop the Solomon temple is a vivid reminder of Islam’s supremacy and irredentism aims. The pretext that the city is holy to Islam by virtue of conquest is tantamount to saying “Possession is 9/10ths of the law.” Islam’s war stance has to vanquish all others before their Allah will cede them their paradise on earth.
What if conspiracies are made up by corporations to sell more tin foil?
[Joke Friday] I picked-up a gal and we decided to go to my place. I suggested that we stop for a pizza, and after we finish that, we hit the sack, and have sex for the rest of the night. I could tell she was uncomfortable, so I said, “What, you don’t like pizza?”
fish-chips23TGIF from Springer’s Bar and Grill. The weekend is around the corner and coming fast. What better place to kick things off then here with us. Today we have 2 great specials for you, Beer Batter Fish and Chips, golden crunchy outside, light and flakey inside or mahi mahi with a pineapple avocado salsa. The sweet and slightly spicy flavor is sure to be a palate pleaser. Come and enjoy with us.
Happy Hour 2-6 daily with great drink specials and happy hour menu.
There’s always something special at Springer’s!
Wal-Mart and K-Mart are nothing but garage and yard sales indoors!
garbage man emptying to truck
Why is a garbage truck beeping in a residential area at 5:30 AM today (Fri)?
The next meeting of our Big Pine Computer Club is coming up this Saturday, January 24, 10 am at the senior center.  Hope to see you there! Events
[Sewers] To the person who wants to learn about our new sewers should type- sewers -in the search box way at the top of the CT or simply read the CT every day! You’ll learn more than you need.
[Cocktail] I think I’ll give this a try.
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] Isn’t this the road we are being lead down? Are we really blind to what’s happening around us? No one seems to care about what’s happening. No one speaks up.
[Conspiracy] Chicken or the egg? Either those 4 passenger planes were destroyed or they weren’t. None of the other conspiracy guys even bring this up. What happened to the 4 passenger jets worth close to a billion dollars and what happened to the passengers on a route that is public knowledge and routings that were used daily. Recall the Airlines took billions in losses after 9/11. You think all those shareholders just took it in the shorts?How did those aircraft get moved to get lost? So there is no record of tail number X, flight X, filing flight plans to go from A to B, flight crews, fuel, maintenance, and of course no one knows anything!I worked with billion dollar companies and nothing gets done without their legal department reviewing the contract. So some lawyer is telling the CEO to quietly dispose of 4 jets? get sued for billions and the government will reimburse them like nothing happened?

Further, publicly traded companies answer to the SEC, all public info.

Further, any part on that jet has tracking numbers in the form of serial numbers. So every mechanical part could never be re-used. None. That’s how it works but United and American would have to take a billion dollar write-off (loss) to explain those jets. All public info to the SEC, FAA, shareholders, insurance companies. Again chicken or the egg?

I got hacked on my yahoo email address. The whole BS story about me being in the Ukraine and my sister having leukemia scam. I’m done with yahoo. I get more crap mail from them then all other spammers combined.
happy valentines day[Sweetheart Dinner Dance] February 14th at 6pm.Prime Rib, Twice Baked Potato, Caesar SaladWonderful Homemade Cheese cake. $20. Entertainment. Funds will help our Sunshine Grandparents at Moosehaven. Members and qualified guestTickets go on sale 1/31/15 in the social quarters, see Donna A. Sargent for any questions call 305-745-5175. Big Pine Moose Lodge Wilder Rd, Big Pine Key. Events
Conspiracy believers love to ask questions, the fact is that that’s all they do. I will not bother to explain Occam’s razor to you if you believe the conspiracy theories. Disproving a negative is simply a waste of time. Link
Get divorced in Detroit for under thirty bucks!
If we got rid of the White, Red, Black, Brown, and Yellow Trash this would be a nice planet!
The politics of victimization. Lou Holtz nails it! Link
meant for iguana terrifies vacationing family. Couple barricades themselves, kids, in hotel thinking they were targets. Another member of the IKC facing charges for almost killing a visiting family. Link
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yellow fireworks
Crazy fireworks launch.
What looks like a launch disaster, but wait… Awesome! Video
The person with the septic tank that just discovered there is a Chernobyl central sewer system being built should contact Dump the Pumps and arrange to chat with someone, or attend one of their informal meetings to get the contact Dump the Pumps and arrange to chat with someone, or attend one of their informal meetings to get the facts instead of FKAA’s deceitful marketing hype.
How do you like your fish?  Enjoy it while it lasts.  Here is some more “bad science” to ponder. Link
[Police Premise Check] You may want to keep this for future use and print out copies. This is the Premise Check request for the Sheriff’s Office so they can patrol your property if you are away. They do check things and do drive by inspections.  This may be a different form than your local police use, but you get the idea.
[Sewers] The Circuit Court hearing for an emergency injunction against FKAA sewer construction without legal permits was heard, and the ruling has been promised by next Friday. DEP had two lawyers and FKAA had two lawyers for a total of four on that side of the room. Dump the Pumps, Inc. had one lawyer, Robert Hartsell. If the sewer system is so great; and the arguments against it so weak; and the actions of FKAA and DEP so above reproach, how come it takes 4 lawyers to defend them? As somebody recently commented, CRWS really stands for the Chernobyl Regional Wastewater System. Dump the Pumps is an all volunteer group of your friends and neighbors, but they have big legal bills to pay and the bills continue to roll in. If you have not thrown another contribution into this righteous cause recently, please do so.
[Oh Oh Department] One of the things you don’t want to see out your planes window.
[Bums] Someday. I hope to be able to afford a new iPhone like the girl front of me with the food stamps.
Due to weather, tomorrow the Way Big Yard Sale scheduled has been postponed until next Saturday. Thanks to all who came last year. That was about a third of what I have to get rid of and you’ll like what you see next week.
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[Conspiracy] Don’t forget the Sandy Hook conspiracy! Wake up Sheeple!
Here is another tip. Don’t go to places where they chop heads off and you won’t get your head chopped off. Stay in Chicago and dodge bullets. You hear dat?
 [ “I wonder how any rational thinking person could be a Liberal”] It’s easy, you just have to think and care about others.
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It makes me wonder , how all the democrats plan to defeat the multiplying terrorists ( note I left out Islamic ), when the moan and cry about Fox news and/or FTR being mean and nasty. I do not believe “nasty comments” on a “blog” will have much effect. However I could be wrong, they may be able to talk them to death.
from the right
FTR is away getting a new Right wing. He’ll return as soon as he’s well. Get well soon FTR!