2014 December

Tuesday, December 23, 2014

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The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsSince 2002. Anonymous Letters to the Editor with pictures. Published Monday through Friday by Noon.

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feliz navidad bells
I would like to wish all my friends in the Keys a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. May all the warm breezes keep you on a straight path to a better 2015. May you all be blessed with a great year and your fishing be the best ever. See you all when the lobsters are plentiful and the fish are bountiful.
[Coke Whore] A Big Pine Key woman, Mary Woodrum, 55, accused of threatening to kill a man and behead his baby with a butcher knife for allegedly stealing her cocaine was arrested Friday night, according to the Monroe County Sheriff’s Office.
fanci-open xmas-eve2014
Last week I saw a bobcat in the woods on BPK. Has anyone else out there ever seen one here?
Havanese Puppies
. 2 Females 8 weeks old on Xmas. Real beauties. Hypoallergenic no shedding and no dander. smart, easy to train. Great companions. Dogs come with AKC registration, health certificate, puppy shots. Asking $1,400 each e-mail at or Phone Orva at Classified Ads > Pets
[“N. Korea”] You know Kim Gung Ho has already viewed a bootleg DVD of “The Interview”. Imagine watching a movie about someone trying to assassinate you!
I am really tired of folks trashing the Post Office. Yesterday, Sunday, my door bell rang, it was my mail carrier with a package for me. She said we are delivering on Sunday for Christmas. It’s easy to complain, just try their job. I bet you won’t last a week. Merry Christmas to all!
pizza slice delivery
[Help Wanted] Popa Jims Pizza on Big Pine (MM30.3) is looking for a line cook to work full or part time. Experience is preferred. Reliable transportation needed. Minimum age of 18. Inquire at the shop. No calls please.   Classified Ads > Help Wanted
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The “Miami Cubans” lost everything they worked for, built up and owned in Cuba when Fidel confiscated all of it for “the people”.  Just think about how you would feel if something like that happened to you.”

Reply: Yeah, we know what it’s like! We went through it in 1929 when 90% of every American lost their homes and bank accounts and jobs. Then again in 2008, when the bubble burst and again, we lost our home investments and our jobs. The only difference is that we didn’t abandon our country as exiles to a foreign land. We stuck through the grit of it all, and are still doing so today.

Why didn’t the Miami Cubans do the same? Why haven’t any of the Miami Cubans attempted to oust Castro right after the Soviet Union abandoned Cuba? Cuba’s military might is obsolete. If every Cuban were to pick up a rock and launch that rock at the military police, they would beat the government enforcers. If the Miami Cubans would’ve stayed in Cuba and had the courage to fight against Castro, the U.S. CIA would have done everything possible to help them. Yet the Miami Cubans boast that if it weren’t for them, Miami would be a hick town. Well in all honesty, if it weren’t for the Miami Cubans exploiting their own countrymen during the Batista regime, Castro would’ve never felt he had to correct any wrong doing. Castro was supported by the majority of the Cubans. So why boast of how they made Miami what it is today, (which in reality is an outright lie, because Miami is what it is today due to N.Y. banks, the mafia and the Colombian Cartels), and yet do nothing to capture their country?

The act of becoming an exile from your own land simply demonstrates that all the Miami Cubans fled Cuba out of fear because they were guilty of wrong doing to their own countrymen, and feared the karma that was coming to them. Just like during WWII when Cuba was playing nice to both sides the U.S. and the Nazis. This is one of the reasons why the U.S. refuses to send American boys and girls to liberate Cuba. Because the old Cubans never showed any loyalty to the U.S. We fought for them once in1898, and yet the loyalty was never shown to the U.S. So spare us the Democracy crap!

Last night’s post about 1st responders is incorrect. First responders are emergency medical personnel.
joe cocker23
Joe Cocker died
yesterday.  At, probably his last appearance in L.A.’s Whiskey A GoGo, he had a panic attack and couldn’t sing and it was said he crawled off the stage weeping and in terror. Party on, Joe! Video
Opening Cuba is the right thing to do. Stop trying to impose our will on others. Why do we trade with China if communism is so terrible? Vietnam? It’s none of our business what other nations do within their own countries.
apple vs windows[“Computer troubles”] Ed, truly, think about migrating to the Apple platform. The price is mollified by the reliability. I made the change four years ago after
all previous years on a MS platform. It is bit of a reeducation, but what else can I say. Hearing about your problems, pains me! All software upgrades have been done totally seamlessly at no cost. Not one crash. Not one hack. No malware. Think about how much you have paid for virus protection. No need with the Apple platform. In the past 4 years I saved perhaps $400 by not having to renew my anti virus Kaspersky. I have no allegiance to any of these products. It just is, what it is. Good luck and Merry Christmas. (Ed: None of my problems have ever been Microsoft related. There is no better operating system than Windows 7. I’ve never spent a dime on anti virus protection. The limitations of Apple OS are too many for me as is the extra cost and limited models of the machines. I like free software and all of it is available to Windows users. That’s not so for iOS. I haven’t had a crash, hack or malware since Windows 7 came out and all software upgrades are seamless [except for Adobe products]. The myths Apple fans spread about Windows are silly.  Thank you for your sympathy, but all my problems are Dell hardware related. My next computer will be a workstation running Windows 10 probably. There is nothing wrong with iOS it’s just that almost everyone uses Windows and it’s real easy to get advice and help, not so with iOS. iOS is an excellent operating system but I don’t like limits concerning computer stuff and customizing the way they work.)
‘Twas the weekend before Christmas
And all on the roads
The morons were driving
I wish they’d explode
cicret bracelet23
[Wearable Electronics] The Cicret Bracelet: Like a tablet, but on your skin. An amazing piece of future technology.  Another Israeli invention. Video
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1957 chevy pink
I’m so glad I lived in this era of automobiles. We’ll never to see anything like it again. Link
[“USA forces attacking ISIS at night”] It’s a video game, folks, not real combat, not even close.
RIP Joe Cocker. I never really could understand what he was singing. Video
[Chili today, hot tamale] Hands down, the absolute, finest chili cuisine is to be had and cherished is in “The Land of Enchantment!” Sofa king good I can’t breathe!
Postal System (this is not the BPK Post office). Not only do they close on the busiest days of the year, the tumbler (hopper where you can mail packages rather than stand in line) is jammed more frequently than not. I force it open and see packages jammed in the drop cart. Go to the window and tell them and they say “I can’t free the tumbler -there’s no one up here allowed to do it” Hello Union, good bye service. If UPS was competitive in price I would never go to USPS — ever
joe cocker22Joe Cocker died today.  His was a unique voice in the soundtrack of my youth. I recall one Sunday afternoon in August 1969. This is what I saw and these are the words I heard (at least I think so). Rest in peace brother.  Video
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Veterans United. Support the troops! Link
[“Postal System Sucks”] I went to pick up a package at 4:30pm and the post office was closed! What kind of business closes at 4:30? Especially during the Christmas rush? They open after everyone is at work (8:30) and close before everyone gets off work. If you want to mail something you have to rush to the PO during your lunch time, stand in line, not eat lunch, and be late for work. No wonder they suck. If you complain all you get are excuses not reasons.
[Black Smoke] Does anyone know what was on fire at around 5:15 pm on Saturday east of Little Palm Island. Black smoke was billowing from either Big Munson, Hopkins or Cook Islands. It was hard to tell from the highway.
elf jack in the box
[Wrapping odd shaped gifts]
 It takes a lot of tape, but it’s much simpler than getting the right sized box and then wrapping that huge thing. Video
Joe Cocker is dead just in time for xmas. I remember him as being a spastic playing the air guitar and singing mush words. He was a great.
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garbage can teeth
Please remember to thank your garbage man this holiday season. These people have the most difficult job smelling everyone’s garbage. I wonder how many tons a day these people physically pick up?
[“Sammy Sam”] What is his phone number? I would love to dump Comcast and get Direct TV. I also don’t want to deal with an installer from Miami that talks like they have a mouth full of peanut butter.
hareens 12.2.14
[Editor’s computer troubles”] NOW will you buy a Mac? Some of mine are ten years old and running fine. (Ed: So is my other Windows PC.)
[“Santa’s dead”] When you stop believing in Santa you get underwear!
[Free Movie] On Tuesday, January 6, Sanctuary Friends Foundation of the Florida Keys ‘Friends in Focus’ will be featuring the free showing of the film GetVegucated. The movie follows the path of three cheese- and meat-loving residents of New York for six weeks as they explore vegetarian and vegan options of living. The showing is held at Marathon Power Squadron Building, 52nd St. Gulf on Loggerhead Lane. Doors open at 6:30p. Free popcorn; drinks are available for a small donation. Events
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scrooge bah humbug[“Making 2014 the year bullshit died”] It will never happen as long as there are greedy politicos and uncaring merchants. Follow the money and it will always lead to some bank in Switzerland. Blacks create their own holes to live in as did the Native Americans, the browns and yellows by over-breeding and not giving a damn about their situations. Like Africa is really the modern marvel of industrial development as is Detroit and LA. Do not give me that old BS line ‘We do not have the ability to get rich and famous’. Oprah is the second richest black woman on this rock. How much does she support blacks? Brown dope dealers are in the same boat destroying their own culture with poison. Redneck white trash breed mutants and are no different than any black or brown. The Red Man has all but died of terminal welfare, alcoholism and mob rule. No, do not give me the crying jags of ‘Help me, help me’. I will not pity losers or bums ever again. It is time to clean out the garbage and use what is left of this planet for food and clean air.
I would love to see a telephone number for Sammie Sam of DirectTV. I’ve just about had it with Comcast. Please post his number should you have it. Business Directory > Utilities > Fl Keys Satellite
[FTR Guy] I was just wondering if the Deer Ed ever thought to do to the FTR guy what The Dish Network did to FOX News. (Ed: I wouldn’t dream of it. FTR is one of our valued advertisers and a source of inspiration to many.)
The second amendment does not allow Americans to murder each other. Your rant against FTR and the Cuban situation was going well until that weird perception of our 2nd amendment rights reared its ugly agenda driven head.
A tree trimmer has died in North Las Vegas, according to the North Las Vegas Fire Department. NVLFD says they received a call about a tree trimmer stuck in a tree. Upon arrival, they discovered the tree trimmer was dead. It appears that he was suffocated when some palms that he cut fell on him.
I started to write a reply to FTR’s Monday post, but saw the futility of trying to argue with and old man who’s still fighting the cold war. I will say that I sure would like to go to Cuba and will as soon as it’s easy enough.
The Republicans vehemently opposed the auto company bailouts mostly because they saw the demise of those car companies as a chance to finally kill off the auto worker unions that those righties have always hated so much.
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Wow, the right really has their tighty whities in a bunch over possible normalization with Cuba. I can see where having communication with people 90 miles away can be dangerous.

But then we didn’t normalize relations with Vietnam that killed 1,000s of our countries best and we didn’t normalize relations with the Germans that carried out the worst atrocities on humans in the history of the world and of course we didn’t normalize relations with the Japanese that snuck in and attacked and killed America troops at Pearl Harbor. We don’t have relations with Saudi Arabia that treats their women like fodder. The Cubans have…………..well they………..ummmm then they. Why is having open relations with the people living 90 miles away so terrible I cant remember?

Oh wait maybe we did normalize relations with the murderers of American troops. My bad. I guess killing Americans is fine with the righties but don’t put anyone in jail I mean theres hardly anyone in our jails.

That embargo is really doing a great job in turning them into a Democracy.

from the right
YESTERDAY A CRITIC WROTE (IN PART): “FTR wrote “no record of any American being tortured for political reasons.” Has he already forgotten that Americans kidnap our enemies in what we like to call “Rendition” or the horrors of Abu Graib prison or waterboarding or freezing our political enemies.”

FTR’S RESPONSE: The balance of the posting was stock footage, if you’re interested, read yesterday’s CT.  But he/she did make one very interesting and revealing comment: “My main interest in opening Cuba is so I can vacation there, that’s it. I don’t care if they’re communist or Republicans I still want to go visit!”

That cynical comment provides proof of my statement of last Thursday: “Many who support it (Obama’s recognition of Cuba) have selfish motives. But those in favor are unable to tell us what real benefit the US will reap for recognizing Cuba. The people of Cuba will continue to suffer a repressive government and the leaders of the Communist party will get even wealthier. And nearly all of the tourism money going into Cuba will be the property of the Cuban government.”

The critic simply doesn’t give a damn about the political and economic repression that the Cuban people suffer. He/she simply doesn’t give a damn about the estimated 8,410 Cubans currently imprisoned for political reasons.

The critic claimed that America holds political prisoners. That simply is not true, we have imprisoned many of America’s political foes, but only those who have committed treason, terrorism, or some other criminal act. Even though Obama has attempted to imprison journalists who are critical of him and his, he has failed because of our system of checks and balances.

The critic suggested that the US routinely engages in torture. That is not true.  The Abu Ghraib prison imprisoned terrorists in Iraq. The brutality of the treatment of those prisoners by a handful of US military persons was an anomaly and those who mistreated prisoners were severely punished.

Did we engage in harsh interrogation tactics? Yes, it worked, and it saved lives. Water boarding was used on only on 3 high profile detainees. Other harsh techniques were used, but only one person was harmed during the entire period that the measures were used. That person died, it is unknown whether the interrogation techniques caused the death or if was from some other cause. Other than that, not a single detainee suffered injury. The enhanced techniques were identical to the ones used in training of certain segments of our military. The techniques were not torture.

The critic seems to be a member of the Disparage America club. He/she seems convinced that America is holding Americans as political prisoners. I challenge him/her to name one.

Obama’s pending diplomatic recognition of Cuba will not initiate trade, only Congress can do that. But it will give the Brothers Castro new prestige in the world. Now, their nation is foundering, it has lost the support of the Russians and Venezuela, its primary patrons.

When Obama was a Senator, he stressed that the U.S. should hold Cuba to a number of stringent conditions before even beginning to normalize relations. The first of those conditions was freedom for Cuba’s political prisoners. Obama laid out his proposal in a May 23, 2008 speech in Miami. Noting the “unanswered cries of the political prisoners heard from the jails of Havana,” Obama said his policy toward Cuba “will be guided by one word: Libertad.”  For non Piners, that means “Liberty.” It’s no surprise that Obama lied.

get out of jailObama has turned his back on all of those political prisoners. And he has granted a “Keep out of Jail” card to a slew of cop-killers, murderous bombers and violent armed robbers who fled to Cuba to avoid American justice.  Once again Obama has abandoned his word, and he has abandoned the Cuban people.

Yep, the critic is ready to toss the Cuban people under the bus so that he can scratch his/her itch to “vacation” in Cuba.

dino-god23PART 2) John McCain, Hillary Clinton, and Barack Obama all die and go to heaven. God looks down from his throne and asks McCain, “Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?” McCain takes a breath and then replies, “Well, I think so because I was a great leader and tried to follow the words in your great book.” God looks down and then says, “You can sit to my left side.” So, McCain takes his seat and then God asks the same question to Hillary, “Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?” Hillary thinks for a second and then replies, “I think so because I have been fighting for the rights of so many people for so long.” God again looks down and this time says, “You can sit to my right side.” Finally God turns to Barack Obama and asks, “Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?” Obama smiled and replied, “I think you’re in my seat.”