2016 December

Tuesday, December 27, 2016

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsSince 2002. Published Tuesdays and Fridays
Letters to the Editor with pictures

[Hospital Scandal] Martha Huggins has done an exceptional job of investigating and reporting on the monkey business going on with our privately run “public” Lower Keys Hospital District’s contractually required Primary Care Clinic. It is funded with $500,000 dollars of our money, but good luck finding the clinic or accounting for the money. This is a very worthwhile read in The Blue Paper (our only investigative journalism news source). Scroll down to also read the previous article of December 16 that provides background information. Like FKAA, the Hospital District Board also has its members appointed by the Governor. The FKAA Board referendum a few years ago, showed that the clear majority of voters agree that Governor appointments are not a good thing. But our vote was ignored by using creative political maneuvering. How is that representation? Link
My fellow motorists.  When we are approaching one another on a small street, and your side is blocked by pedestrians, bicycles, delivery trucks, boat trailers, whatever, it is not up to me to drive into the mangroves on my side so you can use it (the clear side). You need to stop, wait until all oncoming traffic has passed, then use your side. Remember it’s your side that happens to be blocked, not mine, Thank you.


He gave us taste buds, then filled the world with incredible flavors like chocolate and cinnamon and all the other spices. He gave us eyes to perceive color and then filled the world with a rainbow of shades. He gave us sensitive ears and then filled the world with rhythms and music. Your capacity for enjoyment is evidence of God’s love for you. He could have made the world tasteless, colorless, and silent. The Bible says that God “richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment.” He didn’t have to do it, but he did, because He loves us. We got a great deal. Have a very Merry & Blessed Christmas.   ~Coconuts Bar & Liquor Store, downtown Big Pine Key. <@)}}}><

Dietary restrictions ruining Christmas dinner? Well, that just about sums it up. Video
[FTR on Short-Term Rentals] On Friday a poster seemed to be complaining that Monroe spent a ton of money: “stop(ing) locals renting their homes in order to avoid competition with the hotel industry.”  As a long time homeowner on BPK in a ‘hood with plenty of SOB’s who rent short term, I can assure you that “helping the hotels” is not on my radar.  The nasty fact is that short term renters are a huge pain in the ass to all of us. Of course, some are nice folks, but the overwhelming majority are loud, intrusive, messy, and abusers of our ecosystem.  They contribute damn near nothing to our community.  They bring in their own food, the bring in their boats filled with gas and how many small chest freezers have you seen in the back of p/u trucks and boats?  Do you suppose that they use them just to keep the beer that they brought in from the mainland cool?  Basically, the only people who profit from short term renters are out of town profiteers.

Personally, I think that the penalties and the enforcement of the short term rentals ordinances are far, far too lenient.



Long exposure of a volcanic plume shows lightning from intense static charges created inside the ash.

[“County spend big bucks protecting hotels”] If the County would read the Citizens Voice once in a while they’d see that the average person wants Uber and AirBnB not hotels. The County will do almost anything for big business and almost nothing for the average Joe.


Further information about that Century Plant. Although you can certainly make alcohol out of it as you can with almost anything that will ferment, but to make tequila you must have to do it in Tequila, Jalisco, Mexico. Cactus juice fermented anyplace else is usually called pulque. If it’s further distilled, then it’s mescal–with or without the worm. It’s some legal thing and by the way, it was the Spaniards who created tequila not the native N. Americans as some believe.

[Fake Milk] Vermont’s sole congressman says if it’s from soybeans, almond or rice, it should not be labeled as milk.
nira-tocco 700x175
[Lincoln Much Hated] The situation was so hostile to the union in Washington that when the time arrived for President-elect Lincoln to go to the capital of the Nation to be sworn into office, it was deemed unsafe for him to travel, not only as a President-elect, but as any private citizen should be allowed to do. Instead of going in a special car, receiving the good wishes of his constituents at all the stations along the road, he was obliged to stop on the way and to be smuggled into the capital. He disappeared from public view on the biggest day of his life.
mayan pyramid[“Aztec Cannibals”] “The post about cannibalism is very far off base.” No, it isn’t at all. Those facts are taken from History of the Conquest of Mexico by W. Prescott and The Memoirs of Bernal Diaz del Castillo that was written 17th century by and actual conquistador. Castillo wrote extensively from his first person accounts of the human sacrifices and the slaves at the base of the pyramids who were tasked with dismembering the bodies and distributing the meat. Castillo also writes of a long journey of conquest into what is now Central America where the Indians carried dead babies for food because they were easier to carry than carrying adults. Yuk!
George Michael (before he was dead) watching backstage rehearsal of Annie Lennox and David Bowie with Queen- Under pressure. Bowie and Michael are gone. 2016 was not a good year for many reasons. Peace, Love. Video




When you eat too much for the holidays.

[FTR’s  Zika Files] Friends, very recently Never Again Foundation LLC paid for a Facebook ad that touted a developmental vaccine that appears to have great promise as a prophylactic for Chikungunya. That is great news. But we must take the time to actually read Never Again’s supporting documents. If you do take the time you will learn some astonishing and incredibly ironic facts.

The first is that the developmental vaccine is genetically engineered. Yep, it is a GMO. Never Again has never-againbeen a vitriolic opponent of any use of genetic engineering. Period! Can it be that the leaders of Never Again Foundation LLC simply don’t know that in the hell they are talking about?
Second: The developmental vaccine is only in the experimental phase, it has only been used on mice. It is not yet ready for prime time. So far there has been no indication as to when, or even if, it will be approved or available for human use.
Third: The developmental vaccine targets only Chikungunya, but no other tropic disease that is spread by the Aedes aegypti mosquito. That includes Zika (since 12/1 there are more than 50 new reported cases of Zika in Florida. It continues to ravage other nations).
Finally: Any potential tool that combats tropic disease must be examined and if effective, and welcomed.

So far, the reality is that the only immediately available safe, efficacious, ecologically safe, and economic means of combating Zika and a host of other tropic disease is vector control. Vector control by the use of genetically modified Aedes aegypti mosquitoes. The Florida Keys Mosquito Control Authority should move full speed ahead to begin killing Aedes aegypti using GM mosquitoes as soon as humanly possible.

Things you didn’t know your phone could do. Hidden gyroscope? Instant audiobooks? Your new or old phone has some hidden uses. Video
jester-bounce[Sloan’s Christmas Vacation] Sloan leaves for Birmingham screws up every hobos dream free rent spending money and a car to drive. His benefactor say not to spend her money on that crazy drunk that shoots and waves guns and he takes her to Outback gives her a 100 bucks, brags about being a kept man. Then he is surprised when his benefactor is pissed and tosses him out of her apt? And the worst part is he was in his home town and even his own family would not take him in for Christmas, no less. He claims to be working for the people of Key West. Well news flash, Court Jester, your services are neither needed nor wanted here. The university of Alabama sure does not teach you much if you cannot find a homeless shelter in your own hometown. One can only hope KWPD gets as tired of his crap as the rest of us and locks him away till he expires. His expiration date is long overdue! Maybe his wife, as he lies and says Kari is, will have enough of him ruining what’s left of her life and take care of him. She does have practice beating boyfriends after all.
[Little Joke] A cop responds to a call about a woman who shot her husband because he walked across her freshly washed floor.  The dispatcher asked if he had taken her into custody and he responded, “No, the floor’s not dry yet.”
[Sewers] One of my neighbors did his own sewer connection. One of the most expensive parts of the job can be the filling of the old septic tank. Delivered fill can be expensive and a 1,000 gallon tank takes about 5 cubic yards to fill, which can cost hundreds. To save money, he poked a hole in the bottom like Dept. of Health insists upon (why?), then created his own private unlined landfill where he could toss in all the garbage that would otherwise take a special trip to the transfer station, possibly on a special day or with additional charges. You know: stuff like rotten tires that may still be rusted rims, old paint cans, batteries, dead smoke detectors with the Americium 241 radioactive sensor, dead electronics, etc. along with things like the leftover bag of concrete that went hard, logs from the palm tree that died, old furniture and other stuff that Waste Management drives past on trash day.
Now he has a large rectangular concrete injection well to below the tidal groundwater with no concrete top anymore so that every rainfall will leach through his private dump collecting contaminants in a manner similar to a drip coffee maker. The fresh water solution will collect on the top of the salty water below, but tidal action will squirt seawater through the bottom hole into the leachate on a rising tide, and then drain it on a falling tide. I would much rather that he had his old septic tank- with no hole in the bottom and a covered top. I know a prominent Keys plumbing contractor that filled septic tanks with toxic asphalt millings that they could get free for the hauling. Technically, that meets the DOH requirement for clean granular material- and DOH is not watching anyway. We really need to be preserving our septic systems for emergency backup to the questionable Cudjoe regional sewer system instead of creating toxic leachate injection wells all over our islands.


[George Michael Dead] After he got caught “whacking it” in a public restroom, I saw a picture of him wearing a long stupid earring. I immediately removed the earring I had been wearing for ten years and didn’t put it back in for two years. It took me that long to get over the fact that the symbol of the brotherhood of the sea was perverted by that (talented) pervert.

[2d Amendment] 61 people exercised their Second Amendment rights over the Christmas weekend by shooting 61 people just in Chicago alone!
[Sloan’s Christmas Vacation] I told the Birmingham, AL police, yesterday that 2 of their fellow officers had come and told me I did not have to leave, there was a procedure to follow. I was packed up and ready to go yesterday. Today I will take me about 15 minutes to pack. The cops did not seem thrilled that I did  did not walk out right away. They all came in to the apartment and some of them followed me around as I started packing. Did I have an weapons? A pocket knife. Any other weapons? No, have not had a weapon in 30 years (an Itaha pump shotgun and a .22 rifle and a .38 police special, I did not say). I said, I wondered why it took 6 of them to do this? Never know, a couple of them said. Security, a couple more said. I called a cab.



George Lee Crosby

Impressive sinkhole action videos in this 13 minute film, especially the one where the person has a 2 foot hole open beneath their feet as they walk along the sidewalk and they drop into the Earth like god-at-his-computer-far-sidethrough a trap door! God pushed the “smite button”? (Gary Larson’s Far Side comic attached, from Google images) In another, a driver appears to slowly turn his car to steer into the expanding sinkhole. May have been a lemon car, but you would expect him to jump out first. Suicidal but his life insurance only covered accidental death?

Good introduction to sun-earth electrical theory, but I think some of the “facts” were incorrect:
1. A lower charge between core and surface would not pull Earth’s crust towards the core. It would reduce the pull. That would correlate with the expanding earth theory, which does not correlate with sea level rise theories nor with GPS surveying or other geodysy dependent upon an accepted assumed elipsoid reduction.
2. If the earth’s rotation speed has changed, how come a quartz clock still correlates with the ephemeris sunrise-sunset times? Nope, the science fails. Video

hawaiian mary baby globeThis Christmas season mend a quarrel. Seek out a forgotten friend. Dismiss suspicion and replace it with trust. Write a letter. Give a soft answer. Encourage youth. Manifest your loyalty in word and deed. Keep a promise. Forgo a grudge. Forgive an enemy. Apologize. Try to understand. Examine your demands on others. Think first of someone else. Be kind. Be gentle. Laugh a little more. Express your gratitude. Welcome a stranger. Gladden the heart of a child. Take pleasure in the beauty and wonder of the earth. Speak your love, and then speak it again.
Often we get so busy doing Christmas, there wasn’t time to experience Christmas. A Blessed and very Merry Christmas everyone.  ~Coconuts Bar & Liquor Store.
I second the positive submission on Fisherman’s Hospital. My friend went for an emergency some months back and quite simply Dr. Z and RN Stephanie saved her life by a diagnosis of a blood clot in her neck due to a recent surgical procedure on the mainland. Thanks to them and their whole ER team
statues_in_parisThe Statue of Liberty is, indeed, advertising for a product that we no longer need.  There is indeed room for immigration into this country, however in these days with terrorists and economic refugees we desperately need to make sure that all immigrants are willing and able to come in through the front door.  They need to be willing to be vetted, be able to be productive members of society, and most importantly must be willing to assimilate into the melting pot that is this country.

As for false advertising, I believe that the billboard is simply out of date.  Remember that it is over 100 years old and was given to us by France, we did not write the plea ourselves.

I am a product of vastly varying immigrant cultures.  My Grandparents on my father’s side came in through Ellis Island at the turn of the last century from the middle east.  They learned the language, brought a skill and assimilated into the culture.  My mother did the same, coming from Denmark 55 years ago.  Both of my parents were from vastly different cultures, but both sides came together seamlessly.

[“Fuel Perks”] A poster asked if anyone else was having problems using their Winn-Dixie points at the Shell station. I was unable to use my points the last time I got gas on Ramrod. I thought this was just a fluke, but apparently not.


[“Name that duck”] The poster that says the pictured birds are Gallinule Ducks is wrong. They are American Coot’s, and they are not ducks. They are in the Rail and Crane family.  The more you know!

[“Does building a wall on our border make the lady from France a liar”] I’ve only seen photos and read accounts, but the folks that came in through Ellis Island appear to have stood in line and registered in some fashion. A wall on the southern border with doors, staffed points of entry, will be an attempt to keep those coming across honest, and that’s important to our security.

I’m sure there was human smuggling thru New York back in those days of European migration, just as there is along our borders today. My question is, why stir the pot?



Christmas tip: put your Christmas trash in your neighbors yard so they get robbed instead of you.

[Caviar Poop] We found a tiny pile of poo in my yard that looked like large dark caviar. Anyone know what animal has droppings like this?

[Fuel Pump Maintenance] Do you know what happens when you run your fuel tank ¼ full or to the empty line?  Your fuel pump will wear out due to the fact that the fuel pump, which is located in the fuel tank, needs to be cooled by the fuel in the tank to not wear out and get warm.  Do you have any idea how much it cost to have your fuel pump assembly replaced?  It is not cheap by any means.  So might I suggest you find a better way to keep your fuel tank at a minimum of ½ to ¾ full.

When will we realize that we are doing the terrorists bidding? Releasing news like:houses of worship will be targeted by terrorists during the holidays, is just downright stupid. Do yourself and all your coworkers a favor if you’re ever receive a bomb threat, tell the scumbags to go f**k themselves and hang up (and let them blow you up)
The Statue of Liberty doesn’t state, give me your folks with loads of moral turpitude, like fraud, larceny, and intent to harm persons or things. crimes involving dishonesty and theft. She doesn’t say give me the ones that will commit assault with the intent to rob or kill, spousal abuse, and aggravated driving. I almost positive she doesn’t say give me your Islamist extremists who want to cut your head off. If you care to look at what we are fighting check out the link. List of designated terrorist groups



The horrible truth about making eggnog.

[Lousy commercials] Am I the only one who sees a business’s advertising is so obnoxious that I will not deal with them? This is the case with many businesses in Marathon. Now we have some business trying to get us to go to a website to buy coupons! Make your own commercials and lose customers. That’s a great plan, man.
If anything shows religion is a mental illness and tools used by schemers and sick want-to-be dictators. What more do people need to smack them into reality? I think most religious nuts are really self destructive suicidal maniacs. They will pray in front of a tank or crocodile.
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