2018 August

Tuesday, August 28, 2018

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsLetters to the editor with pictures since 0202. Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage days, Tuesdays and Fridays.​​​

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[Hurricane Heroes] I’ll second that! Winn-Dixie and U.S. 1 Radio were indeed the two corporate entities who stepped up to the plate during, and immediately after, the storm.  As for Winn-Dixie, I’d add that they were giving out free food and water days before any of the government agencies.

[“R.I.P. Stump”] Fair winds and following seas, Stump. I remember you before you met your wife. You were quite the party animal as I was. Lana was the best thing that happened to Stump. From the day he met her and pulled himself away from the bar, he was the happiest I ever saw him. Although I’m going to miss him, I can take comfort in that.
[Home Dedication] Almost a year ago, Hurricane Irma struck the Lower Florida Keys damaging thousands of homes. With the generous support of donors and volunteers, Habitat for Humanity of Key West and Lower Florida Keys has been able to assist several area homeowners with repairs through the “Habitat Hammers Back” initiative. Elly Claire’s house is one of those homes, and we are celebrating the completion of the repair work with a dedication ceremony. Please join us on Thursday, September 6th, at 11:00 am at 30035 Angelfish Rd., Big Pine Key. For more information, contact Susan at 305-294-9006 or
[NFL Players Kneeling] Mr. Kendall, You are correct that we all see what we want to see. You are wrong, in that you don’t see the racism in that email. It is there and obvious. The essence of America is freedom and free speech is at the top of the list because if people don’t speak out when they see something wrong, like the epidemic of police shooting unarmed black people, we are not communicating on the important issues in our society. If we don’t communicate, nothing will ever change.

The players who take a knee are NOT disrespecting our country or those who have given their lives for our freedom. Rather, they are exercising one of the rights that those friends gave their lives to defend. I see their kneeling as a position of prayer, for important change in our country, which is highly respectful of our country and its founding principles. If we really want to respect those who have sacrificed for this country and the principles it stands for, many of whom by the way, were people of color, we should all be working together to change the behavior of our police, who are supposedly sworn to protect all of us.

As for “bad decisions”, it is true that some NFL players have a sorry record of public misbehavior, but that isn’t true of all of them. It is equally true that many of our sports figures, including NFL players, are great leaders in public service and philanthropy, and are role models for good behavior. Suggesting that all NFL players are bad actors is unfair to all those who are not. And there is no crime in making millions of dollars. Football is a business and the most highly paid are not the players, who play at great personal risk of injury, but the owners.

That’s what I see. Count me in with the players who take the knee.  ~Michael F. Chenoweth, Lieutenant Colonel, US Army, Retired, Key Largo

[Vote] WHEN YOU GO TO VOTE TODAY, I hope you will consider the participation records of all the Utility Board Candidates because for the past 10+ years when the time came to show up and do the work on our County’s local utility and conservation policies, I was the only one there!

During the past 10 years I spent the first 6½ years, and 250± meetings, working as an unpaid private citizen: Including, 3 years and 50+ meeting to update our County’s new 2030 Comprehensive Plan.
-Clarifications on the legislative authority of electric utilities.
-Expansion of our County’s central wastewater collection system.
-Water quality and canal restoration – and attention to the FKRAD.
-Species and environmental protection advocacy.

I then spent another 3¾ years (and 50± meetings) as your County Planning Commissioner helping to write our County’s new 2030 Land Development Code and managing and advancing our local utility and conservation policies.

I’ve also spent more than 6 years on the Keys Energy Advisory board, and I’m the only candidate who’s worked with Keys Energy on a new/major electrical extension project.

I’m the only candidate who has worked with numerous biologists, FWC, USFWS, our County (most all departments, incl. our County biologist), our BOCC, the PSC (Public Service Commission), and the State DEO, towards advancing our local utility and conservation issues.

So, when I say I will work towards better conservation and lowering customer costs at both the Utility Board level and the consumer level, and that I will bring new and expanded home energy and conservation programs to our community, you can believe it’s true because for more than 10 years now, I’ve been the one successfully fighting for our community and the conservation of our Keys.

I hope as you go to vote today, you will consider my local knowledge, experience, and proven record of commitment to our community.

Thank you,  ~Beth

Beth Ramsay-Vickrey for KW Utility Board Seat D, ,





[Straws] Hey California, What happens if an illegal alien uses a plastic straw in a sanctuary city? They’d better hide them well!

[Phishing] I am in need of a trusted account where i can transfer the total sum of £15,800,000.00 GBP (Fifteen Million Eight Hundred Thousand Great British Pounds Sterling) the money belongs to our late customer who passed on several years ago and has no record of either a next of kin or another signatory to the account that could possibly claim the Money…bla,bla,bla send me your bank account number.
[“Have a house on land with no neighbors, but within a couple of miles of a supermarket and the ocean”] How close do you want to be to the water? Look north of Tampa/St. Pete. There’s plenty of homes on 2, 5 and 10-acre tracts – not a lot of traffic so you can haul ass. Publix is everywhere except Big Pine Key; and it’s not all New York owned vacation rentals there either.





For all you conspiracy theorists, I dare you to take a drink, I triple dog dare you!

[Bums] The KW Homeless shelter has moved three times that I can remember. If a small city like ours doesn’t know what to do with such a small homeless population what are the big cities to do? This is a problem with no solution because you are dealing with irrational losers.


[It’s Time to Choose] There are four candidates to choose from for Utility Board Seat D.  Three are associated with Keys Energy – two are Advisory Board members and one is a former employee.  Walt is an independent utility expert with no ties to the utility, its management or existing board.  He will bring his education, knowledge and experience along with a fresh outlook to the many problems that need to be addressed.  He is the only candidate that will challenge management and the existing board members with new ideas and pragmatic solutions that will lead to lower rates, secure financial planning, and a well-managed company.

Vote Walt Drabinski Keys Utility Board Seat D.  Thank You!

[No Name Key] Has anyone heard anything about the land grab taking place on No Name Key now that they have electricity? Two fellows by the name of Burkhardt and Guy? Looks like they’ve spent upwards of $2,000,000 buying 5 or 6 parcels since December 2017 in the Dolphin Estates subdivision. The island is under attack again.
[NFL Role Models] I guess we all choose what we want to see. I don’t see racism, I see spoiled NFL players who have been blessed and make millions of dollars and have made bad decisions regardless of color. This includes their kneeling that disrespects our country and my friends who have given their lives for our freedom.
[#1 issue in America–Straws] Quite obviously you haven’t been paying attention to the mainstream media over the past several months. Those evil plastic straws that are strangling our country must be stopped. America is doomed because of this sinister plot using evil straws. They must be eliminated. It’s the #1 issue on the ballots this November. Let’s take a stand. Say no to plastic straws.


It would be nice to have an authentic Mexican restaurant down this way. Key west has none worth speaking of that have a non wine-based margarita. I’d like to sit and watch soccer, have a real margarita, have queso dip, and a halfway decent order of tacos de carne asada.

[NFL players] There are a lot of good police officers out there (I would say the majority) who put there lives on the line for yours, mine and the NFL players’ safety. There are always a few bad apples, but the majority should not pay the price for other NFL players.  I think it is a bad decision to take a knee during the National Anthem. If these players wanted to make a difference with police reform and maintaining a positive image with patriotic Americans they should have done something else. Taking a knee is very bad publicity and derails their whole agenda by shifting the topic form what they are protesting to patriotism.
[Divided We Fall] I am really getting tired of the war between the Left and the Right and how the media is propagandizing the public. Freedom of the press does not mean to lie and twist truths. I see who owns the medias and if I had that magic button… yeah, right!





[Stay Home] The lottery gives you a 1 in 302,575,350 you won’t go to work tomorrow. Alcohol gives you 1 in 5.

[Movies] Watching an 80s sifi film, I wondered why the crew were wearing silly helmets that appeared to serve no particular purpose than as a fashion statement. This particular movie had the spaceship going to Saturn’s 9th moon–a very long time to be wearing something so uncomfortable and really useless.
[“Vitamin D scandal”] Friday’s link to the NY Times’ article about the vitamin D scandal seemed an awful lot like a ‘gotcha’ article. It was mostly about how unimportant it was to take vitamin D supplements and only mentioned its benefits in one brief sentence, admitting D was necessary for bone health. Article



[Cormorant and Chick] With the mangroves not recovering as fast as other growey things in the Lower Keys after Irma, bird-watching takes on a whole new dimension. With the leaves gone you can see all kinds of birds’ nests and chicks all over the place.

[DUI Arrest] A Florida man told cops he didn’t drink while driving, only at stop signs. Sounds like a local.
I agree that priests should never be left alone with children. Unless the Catholic Church allows priests to marry this will go on forever. The Church can’t fire the Bishops if they confess because that is what the Church is all about –confession and forgiveness. Until then (maybe another 2000 years) never leave a priest be alone with a child.





[“Algae”] The red tide and algae bloom in Florida is awful, but we have our own algae bloom in our small pond.

My wife had a box of clothes she said she was going to donate.  I said, “Why bother, just throw them in the trash.”  She said, “There are poor, starving people who could use them.”  I said, “Anyone who will fit into those clothes is not starving.”  That’s when the fight started.
[Role Models] NFL Team Arrests Since 2000. Minnesota Vikings 42, Cincinnati Bengals 40, Denver Broncos 36, Tennessee Titans 33, Miami Dolphins 28, Kansas City Chiefs 28, Jacksonville Jaguars 27, Tampa Bay Buccaneers 27, Cleveland Browns 26, San Diego Chargers 25, Indianapolis Colts 24, Chicago Bears 23, Seattle Seahawks 20, New Orleans Saints 20, Washington Redskins 18, Oakland Raiders 18, Baltimore Ravens 18, Carolina Panthers 18, Green Bay Packers 17, Pittsburgh Steelers 17, Atlanta Falcons 16, San Francisco 49ers 16, Detroit Lions 15, New England Patriots 15, Buffalo Bills 14, Dallas Cowboys 13, New York Giants 13, Arizona Cardinals 12, New York Jets 11, Philadelphia Eagles 10, Houston Texans 9, St  Louis Rams 8

Total arrests: 656


[Vote] I’m Debbie Halama who is running for County Commissioner. Join me tonight at Milagro Restaurant on Big Pine Key for pizza and snow cones from 7-9.

The AARP activities calendar is online. Full Menu > Ongoing Events
[Whale of a Tale] Michael Fishbach is founder of Great Whale Conservancy and spends his life trying to stop their numbers from dwindling – there are maybe 25,000 left in the world which puts them in the endangered category. Michael tells Outlook how he was able to save a humpback whale called Valentina. Audio
Illegal immigrants sent $56 billion in cash to their home countries last year alone. That’s after their kids enjoyed free education, free lunches, and free medical care paid for by you!
[Priests] Church rape cover-up. Chilean police have charged a prominent Catholic priest with molesting seven children—the first cleric to be arrested after a raid on church files last month. Qscar Mufioz Toledo, 56, admitted to clergy in January that he had abused a child, and the Vatican was investigating his case but had not referred it to Chilean authorities. In May, all of Chile’s bishops collectively offered their resignation to Pope Francis because of the longstanding cover-up of priestly abuse of children; he accepted five of the  resignations. Archbishop of Santiago Ricardo Ezzati, who has also been accused of hiding abuse, said the church would cooperate with the investigation, and added that he felt “great pain” for the rapist, his family, and the victims.





This is a little blue heron chick.

Is English tea different than the tea we drink here? Tea just doesn’t have the jolt of coffee. Is English tea reinforced with extra caffeine?
No more gated communities in the Keys. Stop changing the way of life here.



Baby feces may be source of beneficial probiotics. Scientists at Wake Forest School of Medicine have developed a probiotic “cocktail” derived from gut bacteria strains found in infant feces that may help increase the body’s ability to produce short-chain fatty acids. Why is that important? Link

[Vote] today is August 28, Primary Election. When I am elected to Utility Board Seat A, I will have more to speak about in my first year then in 14 years with nothing more than Hurricane Irma to speak of as accomplishments. I am pro renewable green energy. I will do what I can to bring compensation of the Board in alignment with our City Commissioners’.
I am so happy to have met so many people from the new Seat D. Remember four years ago it would never happen ‘an act of God’ we were told. Well look what happened. I thank you for your vote and will be proud to represent you on our Utility Board, Seat A. This message is approved by Jim Marquardt for Utility Board, Seat A
[Metric System] Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight. There would be mass confusion




The real smoking gun.

“Are they here yet, mommy?”
“Who dear?”
“The holiday season rent-a-cops.”
“No, dear. They are just our local cops in drag, making their quotas as usual.”
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