2013 December

Friday, December 20, 2013

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[Must-Have Gifts] This is the first Christmas I remember where there wasn’t one must have item like the Snuggie. Every year had one starting with the Fleming Bottle and Jug Cutter and the Popeil Veg–Matic of the 70s.

[“Does the new $100 bill really have a radio transmitter”] No. See Snopes. Link
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love dog

[Loves Post Office] I’ve had nothing but good service from all the US Post Offices I’ve frequented in the Keys. Maybe because I understand what a tough job they have, especially around the holidays and try to cheer them up. If I sense it’s not going to work, then I minimize contact and just try to get what I need done with and get out. 

[Vote For Me II] Ladies and Gentlemen, I would like to run for county commission because I feel that you and I are not being heard. We have been taken advantage of for to many years. The sewer issue is way over due and yet I do not feel it is being done right. Decisions for our county need to be made after researching, not passing the responsibility to others to solve. I do not feel that Monroe county is much more different then other areas. I believe that we should be looking at results from areas that have already tackled the problems and then making it bend to fix our needs. To much money is wasted on studies and to little is done. I am not for grinder pumps, and I am concerned about the incinerating of waste on Ramrod Key. I hear your complaints and concerns and I want to help. I am a working class single mom that has to punch a time clock everyday so I can relate to your concerns. When people come to my office or call me, they want something, need something, don’t understand something; by the time they leave they feel that they have been heard, they understand the issue and they leave satisfied. That is the type of service I want to provide for the citizens of this county. (continued below in Long Winded Tomes) 
[Witness Wanted] Thanksgiving Day tragedy sees increasing doubts about what really happened to Charles Eimers. Looking for witnesses. Link



Fishing was tough yesterday, lots of lady fish. Merry and blessed Christmas to all.

[“Adjustable head hammer”] I’ve never seen one on hundreds of construction sites, none of the carpenters I’ve met ever had one. It appears to have no purpose to drive new nails with plenty of room because the angle and placement of the nail can be matched to the fixed head hammer and swing angle. It might have purpose to drive a new nail in a tight spot, but then a screw is much better suited in those locations or use a nail punch. For pulling nails in tight locations, a steep angle nail puller is the carpenters choice as it can be driven into the material to get under the head and pinch the shank. Since a carpenter needs a nail punch and puller anyway, the adjustable head hammer certainly doesn’t make much sense.

santa waving w giftsThe Big Pine Flea Market is open every Saturday and Sunday 8am till 2pm.

Last week I posted stocking stuffer ideas. Thank you to all of you who came in and bought them all. The number of locals who told me they read my post amazed me. I would like to say that I am sorry to all the people who came in late Sunday when I was sold out of so many things they wanted. I have completely restocked with any last minute gifts you might want. Flashlights and lanterns seemed to be the best inexpensive gift this year. I have 10 kinds now, including bike lights.

Mom gifts: Tropical dresses, hats, jewelry, wind chimes, nail polish, natural homemade soaps and salts,

stained glass, Bali wooden sculpures, crafted bamboo photo albums,

Dad gifts: Fishing hats, dry-fast fishing shirts, watches, lanterns, fishing poles, tackle, giant shark jaws,

grill tools, polarized sunglasses and much more.

Kid gifts: Water ball yoyos, fishing poles, tee shirts, bike lights, alligator heads, hair clips and lots of


Friends gifts: Flashlights, Conch Republic hats and flags, magnets, sea shells, wind chimes, coffee cups,

People you don’t like:  Black rocks, whoopie cushions, marbles … so just be creative. 

The money you spend with us locals stays in our community. After the market you will see us shopping at Winn Dixie, Walgreens and CVS. On fishing days we are next to you at the bait store.

Merry Christmas everyone and have lots of fun with your Families.



It’s cold outside, better put a hat on!

[More bar wisdom] I pretend to like people everyday. It’s called being an adult. That’s why we’re allowed to buy alcohol.
[“Eggnog is alcoholic pancake batter”] No, it’s actually an alcoholic omelette. 
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If Bill Gates is so smart and rich how come he still has a little boy haircut that looks like his mother cut? 

The US Post Office is losing money because they haven’t innovated with the times, it’s what happens when government socializes an industry. However think about the value, it only costs a few cents to deliver an envelope to any address in the United States, no matter how far flung it is in the boonies.

And yes one can return a box to sender, provided it hasn’t been opened. Allowing open packages to be ‘return to sender’ would allow people to ship twice for one payment and since the US Post Office is funded by taxpayers, that is ripping all of us off. Hang in there postal workers! 

nira tocco realtor 9.12
[Free Apps Spying] The flashlight app referenced here yesterday was free but asked for permission to follow you. This is true with most free apps. You are given the app for free in exchange for your privacy which they sell. As someone at Google said– whoever has the most data wins. 
I’m also no fan of the post office, and do ship FedEx mostly for packages because it’s usually cheaper. Down here on Summerland Key, the post office folks and the letter carriers are very nice and caring. Sounds like they may be the exception or some of these posters are ornery and that’s why they get treated rudely.
happy holidays snowman longI would like to give a holiday shout out to Dr. Grider and his helpful staff. He has been our family Dr. going on 20 years and has helped us to wellness many times. His caring attitude and positive outlook are only a part of what makes him an outstanding Doctor. Happy holidays Dr. Grider to you and your staff!
[Grinder Pumps] Oscar Wilde wrote,  “It is only with the best of intentions that the worst work is done.”
isaksen-flood-roof 4.23.13
I see where FTR is insulting people again (see: Emanuel brothers from his last pontification). I thought FTR condemned that sort of cheap shot. 


Your local Radio Shack next to Winn Dixie now sells Consumer Cellular phones. It has been rated as the #1 cell-phone service. They offer AARP discounts, nationwide service and rates that start at $10/month. No contracts and phones start as low as $34.99. Stop in the store and check them out. (Ed: I’ve used Consumer Cellular for three years without one problem and they are cheap.) 

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[“Why sewer the Keys”] Because the effluent from septic tanks is leaching to the ocean through our porous lime rock (marl and oolite).
Carol Burnett Show outtakes – Mr. Tudball needs a secretary. Video 



My dear old departed grandma loved matchmaking. This picture shows her bringing love to the lonely men in the Florida Keys. The one on the right is the cuter one, but the left one has a better personality. 

[Citizen Of The Day Says] Loves being a mom to Zyleia and also loves the ocean.
[Missing Money] In 2007 the state Legislature appropriated $200,000,000 in wastewater and stormwater funding for the Keys. With that and the 1 cent tax there should be more than enough money to install gravity sewers that are supposed to cost $200,000,000. It appears there is more than enough money to put in a proper sewer system instead of the discount system now going in. 

dump20If you are a resident of the Florida Keys please go to this site and sign the petition. FKAA AND BOCC are planning on installing a long term money eating, environmentally catastrophic sewage system in order to squander a few more dollars to spend on nothing that has to do with our infrastructure.

If you already have your sewer installed don’t think this doesn’t concern you. If this stuff is installed, next hurricane the Keys and surrounding waters will take a major environmental hit. We all will pay for it.

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[“Free Flashlight App Tracking You”] It’s not just that one, about 75% of apps are spying. It’s worst on Android and iOS is no angel either. Both are bad that they care less about you than their revenue streams. Link 


[“SpellCheck”] I have Internet Explorer and if I misspell a word a red line shows up. However, I just noticed that on writing this email to you it corrected a misspelled word, but it also just underlined another misspell in red, so I still have to go to the dictionary. (Don’t take off for punctuation). (Ed: If you right click on the underlined word it will give you spelling options and save you a trip to the dictionary. As a matter of fact ditch the dictionary and in Google type ‘define’ [without the quotes] and then the misspelled word, and as you type AutoSuggestion will offer suggestions right below it, just click one that looks good and Google will give you the definition — if it’s the right one you’re in! It’s a lot faster than looking up something you don’t know how to spell in a paper dictionary.) 
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[“How do I get SpellCheck on my pc”] The first through 12th grades! 

[“New $100 bill radio transmitter”] No transmitter as it has no power, but it does have a new 3D strip imbedded that may (or may not) respond weakly to a RFID signal (powered by the RF signal itself) with a simple single code, perhaps the bill’s serial number which then can be compared to a database to see how much money one is carrying. This would make little sense to employ, as RFID signals are relatively easy to block with RFID blocking wallets, metal, water, etc. and worn bills would be less effective.

Looking at the new money with all it’s new security features, it’s obvious physical currency is nearing it’s end and some sort of mark of the beast (666) on the head or forehead type system using RFIDs implanted under the skin (fine as a grain of sand) is the next phase. Right now they are getting people used to being spied on 24/7 via their cell phones, tablets, computers, smart TV’s, GPS devices, license plate readers, facial reading cameras and hosts of other devices first. Link

colors20Apple hasn’t come out with one new innovation since Steve Jobs left. Their latest ‘innovation’ was to change colors on the iPhones. Whoopie. When a company’s’ best shot at innovation is to change colors, it makes you wonder if they’ll go the way of Panasonic, Sony and Pioneer electronics. Steve must be rolling in his grave.

[“Eggnog is basically alcoholic pancake batter”] I’m going to try some! Wonder if I’ll get a buzz from it?

dolphins7On the first day of Christmas, Mother Nature sent to me
A Peacock in a Pine Tree
On the second day of Christmas, Mother Nature sent to me
2 Gators at the Blue Hole
and a Peacock in a Pine Tree
On the third day of Christmas, Mother Nature sent to me
3 elusive Marsh Rabbits
2 Gators at the Blue Hole
and a Peacock in a Pine Tree
On the fourth day of Christmas, Mother Nature sent to me
4 Swallowtail Butterflies
3 elusive Marsh Rabbits
2 Gators at the Blue Hole
and a Peacock in a Pine Tree
On the fifth day of Christmas, Mother Nature sent to me
5 Silver Rice Rats
4 Swallowtail Butterflies
3 elusive Marsh Rabbits
2 Gators at the Blue Hole
and a Peacock in a Pine Tree
On the sixth day of Christmas, Mother Nature sent to me
6 Osprey and Harriets
5 Silver Rice Rats
4 Swallowtail Butterflies
3 elusive Marsh Rabbits
2 Gators at the Blue Hole
and a Peacock in a Pine Tree
On the seventh day of Christmas, Mother Nature sent to me
7 Dolphins diving
6 Osprey and Harriets
5 Silver Rice Rats
4 Swallowtail Butterflies
3 elusive Marsh Rabbits
2 Gators at the Blue Hole

and a Peacock in a Pine Tree 

[Recall Who or What?] The number of signatures required to force a recall election is a percentage of the population based on the previous census. I wish I knew how to legally word the petition, but perhaps someone knows how and will prepare it. We would be quite eager to take it around to gather signatures.
duck walkIt concerns me that a man who spends a lot of time around ducks considers himself an expert on bestiality.
Deer Ed, I was wondering if you are able to insert a spell check program into the section that we type our comments into? It seems like it would save you a ton of time and keep us from looking so foolish. (Ed: Good idea. I’ll ask my teacher next Thurs if it can be done.) 
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Of course this whole central sewer project is about a few insiders making a fortune on our backs. If it was about clean water and saving millions now and in years to come, they would simply supplied a free take your choice of an incineration or composting toilet for every bathroom in your house and be done with it. No pipe lines no central treatment. Just keep the working septic systems for your grey water and completely eliminate the bodily waste from the equation. 

Funniest Auto Correct fails of 2012. Link
[FKAA Trying to Kill Residents] To the residents living down SR4A on Little Torch, the boil water order has been extended until Saturday. Supposedly it has been in effect since Monday or Tuesday but the automated notification system never reached us. FKAA didn’t bother to put a sign at the entrance to SR4A to let the residents know their water could be contaminated. I wonder how many others were never told. I guess they are just so hell bent on putting in the system that the health and safety of the customers really doesn’t matter. Say no the pump! 



Fanci Seafood would like to thank all of you for your patronage with homemade Christmas cookies, a tradition that we would like all of you to taste and enjoy! We also have Gift Certificate available. 

[“How do I get SpellCheck on my pc”] The easiest way is to write your post in an email then copy and paste it to ‘Your Comment’ box. (Ed: It’s even easier if you just send that email to and avoid the comment box step)
How can it be the Political Zone if theres only 1 pay for posting customer? Maybe change the title to “1/4 truths for sale” zone.
Can you really make pancakes with eggnog? Dam, I think I will give it a try. 
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apple vs windows[$21,000 Apple Computer] Why? To flick your rich boogers on everyone else or to edit 4K video nobody watches. Graphics cards are non-upgradable and the operating system requires a annual upgrade which breaks your software. Extended warranty is good for only 3 years, but hey you can afford to be on the cutting edge and buy a new machine $21k machine every three years right? The tower portion is Made in America, verses China where Apple makes everything else for $1.20 a hour in 12 hour a day, 60 hour a week sweatshops at Foxconn. Link
Thank you to everyone who attended the FKAA board meeting in support of dumping the grinder pumps. We have on YouTube the FKAA stating they are in support of gravity systems.

[Bad Birds] 97% of chicken tested have harmful bacteria. Read on how to handle and cook chicken safely. Don’t eat or handle wild Keys’ chickens, iguanas, eggs, etc. without first learning all about their contaminations. Link



[Grinder Pumps] Another argument that keeps being missed on radio and newspaper interviews about the grinder pump issue is if a homeowner must be stuck with a grinder pump, why can’t they install them on the right of way in a manhole, one pump servicing a small group of properties. This would solve the problem with homeowners having to have their houses rewired because they can’t take the load, the issue of handing a chunk of your property over the FKAA and would require less pumps.

[Friday Joke] A 92 year old man goes to his doctor and tells him he wants to have one more child. The doctor says, “Well, I think we’re going to have to have a sperm sample.” He hands the old man a plastic container. The old man comes back the next day, and the doctor looks at the empty bottle and says, “What’s the problem? “

The old man says, “The problem? The problem is I tried with my right hand. Nothing. Then I tried it with my left hand — nothin.” Then I called the Missus in. She tried it with her right hand. Nope. Then she tried it with her left hand. Nope again. Then she tried it with her teeth in. No luck. Then she tried it with her teeth out. Still no luck.

That’s when we decided to bring Big Helga the Swede from next door to help out.

“Wait a minute” the doc said, “I can see you trying and your wife certainly giving it a shot, but why would you want to get Big Helga involved?”

The old man says, “Well, we figured if anybody was gonna get the lid off that damn bottle Helga could!” 



Bizarre forms of transport. New meets the old.

[Speech] When a gay person “comes out” it great. Phil Robertson came out with his thoughts on sin. A&E said you can’t speak your thoughts, you’re not allowed.

I support your right to be gay and Phil’s right to say it is a sin.

from the right

elephant gopI’m a Republican, and I have respect for much of the political views of the Tea Party Thinkers. But, I occasionally disagree with their legislative tactics.

One of the many things that I really respect in the Tea Party ethos is its demand that we get our national spending under control. The waste and absolutely inane spending that our current government engages in is nearly beyond comprehension.

Every year Senator Tom Coburn, Republican of Oklahoma,   publishes a document he calls the “Waste Book”.  This year’s waste book is worth a read, it can be found at Link.  It contains 100 or more of some the more egregious examples of government waste of your money.

A few examples:

The Popular Romance Project,  $1 million  to “explore the fascinating, often contradictory origins and influences of popular romance as told in novels, films, comics, advice books, songs, and internet fan fiction, taking a global perspective—while looking back across time as far as the ancient Greeks.

A government study that determined that wives Should Calm Down (NIH) all of that for the measly price of $325,525 tax dollars.

A $3 million  NASA study to unravel one of the biggest mysteries in the universe… Congress works.

$65 million of Hurricane Sandy “Emergency” Funds Spent on TV Ads

Nearly $400k  to fund a NASA YouTube TV show and cartoon series called “Green Ninja” in which a man dressed in a Green Ninja costume teaches children about global warming.

A Yale University Federal Research Grant Studying the Oddity of the Duck Penis – (NSF) $384,989 (apparently it’s corkscrew shaped)

Just one more thing.  The Feds spent $400,000 to fund a Yale study to determine if Republicans/Conservative/Tea Partiers were as bright as Democrats/Liberals/Progressives.  That is amazing, actually shocking. But the results of that study actually shocked the biased investigator, Prof. Dan M. Kahan.  He, in his abstract of the study reported: “…(the) data (is) inconsistent with the hypothesis that political conservatism is distinctively associated with closed-mindedness: conservatives did no better or worse than liberals on an objective measure of cognitive reflection.”

Prof Kahan admits his bias against Conservatives in a quote from  Politico: “I’ve got to confess, though, I found this result surprising. As I pushed the button to run the analysis on my computer, I fully expected I’d be shown a modest negative correlation between identifying with the Tea Party and science comprehension,” Kahan wrote. Yep, Deer Friends, Tea party members know more science than non-tea partiers. Link

joe20Part 2) Monroe County’s U.S. Congressperson,  Joe Garcia, D-Miami, is scrambling and scuffling to try to get his  constituents to forget that he was an ardent supporter of the Affordable Care Act, aka Obamacare, aka Democare. Democare seems to be the proper tag for the bill because none of it could have happened if it had not had universal Democrat support in Congress. There was not a single Republican vote for it.

The Democrats refused to even consider any of the many Republican tries to improve the law.  Now, to quote Mr. Obama’s infamous Pastor, Rev. Wright, “Goddamn the United States, the chickens have come home to roost”

Last month Democrat Rep Joe Garcia, a long time and supposedly ardent liberal, tried to distance himself  from Democare, and his support of it,  by voting in favor of a Republican bill that would have allowed Americans satisfied with their health insurance to keep it. The measure passed the Republican House and was killed in the Democrat Senate.

Project Vote Smart (Link) is a strictly non partisan endeavor to learn and then publish the political positions of political candidates. You really should take a look at the link.   It is described as a “Political Courage Test” of Joe Garcia, Democrat, Monroe County U.S. Representative.

For the sake of brevity, I won’t list the things that he was for or against, but will only list the things he did not have the courage to take a position on.

He refused to take a position on: Abortion, Afghanistan, Reducing defense spending to balance budget, Increasing income taxes to balance budget, Requiring states to implement education reforms in order to be eligible for competitive federal grants, Supporting the federal regulation of greenhouse gas emissions,  Gun control, Targeting suspected terrorists outside of official theaters of conflict?

As far as I can tell, Garcia has not sponsored a single bill, but he has co-sponsored several including such landmark legislation as: Congratulating Pope Francis on his election and recognizing his inspirational statements and actions. And honoring the life, accomplishments, and legacy of Nelson Mandela and expressing condolences on his passing.

Yessir, Joe Garcia is a real firebrand Democrat politician.  A man of great courage willing to risk it all for the sake of his constituents and the good old U.S. of A.   Not!

Please send me your comments at

Long Winded Tome

(continued from above …) I will not always vote the way you want but will try to keep the over all best interest of the county at heart. I want our tax dollars to get us the most for our money. That is why I am starting here on CT. I want to hear your concerns. Give me a chance to show you how I think. If I do not satisfy you I will not run, and you have nothing to loss. If you like the way I think then when the time comes I will introduce myself to you. I do not have all the answers but I will ask the experts for their opinion.

Crime from Miami, affordable housing and the homeless are some of the big issues that need to be carefully calculated. Affordable housing: this is one of the few areas where we do not have apartment complexes. We have heard in the past that the big developers are supposed to provide a small percentage of affordable housing along with their developments but where is it? I don’t see, it do you? If we are not going to put a large box store in the Toppino property on Rockland Key maybe we can get someone to develop a housing complex of apartments there. I know it’s about the money, and there is not as much profit and taxes in apartment complexes but even 50 units would help elevate the housing problem.

Sewers again: We have been given millions of dollars from the BP Spill with $11 million going into our local pot of money. Do you think that sewers apply for restoring and benefiting the marine environment and economy? FKAA said this morning they would do more gravity feed systems if they got more money. Lets do it right the first time, the initial expense will be minuscule compared to the long term benefits. Update: Good job FKAA protesters you have won a victory and brought back the basic rights that made this nation great. You have been heard.

Lately I feel like I am hearing more true from our local politicians. What a refreshing breeze is blowing in the Keys. Case in point, the homeless issue. I agree with the KW commissioner that does not want to give amenities to the homeless that our own soldiers do not get. Brave statement, but when one district does not feel it has a homeless problem they are wrong. When our sheriffs office needs to increase their operating budget next year due to the costs of incarceration and medical expenses for homeless, then it affects every taxpaying citizen in this county. We need to get something back from these people, maybe if we kept them for a few days more and put them on work detail in a few years the word would spread that you do not want to come to our community if you do not want to work. Our own sheriff believes that ” If you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime”. I have no problem giving a hand up to those that are in need.

Also I want a noise ordinance that protects the working class. I personally need to be protected from baking dogs all night and roosters in a residential neighborhood. Had we had something with teeth in it on the books we might not of had to cut our nose off to spite our face with the rental issue of the 30 day rental ordinance that has killed the income of the lower keys. When I call the sheriffs office and animal control and I get no satisfaction of even a fine to the offending house hold, what am I paying my taxes for? Roosters are farm animals not domestic animals. If you want a rooster go live on a farm or a tiny island in the Caribbean, not in a working class neighborhood.

I hope this gives you an idea of what I want for our county. I will keep reading CT for your questions and concerns, but for now I have to get ready for work. Have a good day and a wonderful Holiday Season.