2018 November

Friday, November 9, 2018

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsLetters to the editor with pictures since 0202. Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage days, Tuesdays and Fridays.​​​​

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Winn-Dixie is proud that The Moose Lodge donated $500.00 in support of the Folds Of Honor program that the local Winn-Dixie is collecting donations for through Monday.  This weekend, Winn-Dixie will be having a fund-raising event in the parking lot at the store.  There will be raffles for all kinds of goodies, including a $5 raffle for a $600 inflatable paddle board.  Also, pork BBQ plates will be $10 (while supplies last), all proceeds to benefit The Folds Of Honor.  Arty Pontecurvo from The Moose was generous enough to donate his time and work to cook over 300 pounds of Boston Butts to support the event.  Great teamwork at the Moose and Winn-Dixie to support the dependents of our troops that have sacrificed so much for our freedom.

Fold Of Honor is a non-profit organization that funds scholarships for spouses and dependents of our military service members that have become injured or perished in the line of duty.  ~ Kenny Lowe Store Manager, Store #0358

[Johnston Tops Romero For Mayor] Key West elects the first openly lesbian mayor in Florida history. We had the first openly gay man as mayor now it’s the girl’s chance! Link



[Coal] Why anyone would promote coal is baffling to many, when the alternative energy industry provides more than seven times the jobs dirty coal does.

We are told to not judge all Muslims by the action of a few lunatics but to consider all gun owners evil because of a few lunatics.

Congratulations to all the election winners and thank you to all who ran! I want to especially congratulate Michelle Lincoln Coldiron for winning our District 2 BOCC seat, and to thank Tommy Ryan for running and bringing attention to issues in our BPK/Lower Keys community.

I do believe Michelle will be active and involved in our Lower Keys community, and I have faith in her ability to represent us not only at the local level, but at the State level as well.

Congratulations Michelle! And thank you Tommy! ~Beth Ramsay-Vickrey




Happy Veteran’s Day.

[Guns & War] Out of all the topics talked about in this election I can’t think of any candidate that even mentioned the war. No one cares enough about it to do anything or even talk about it. It’s the same with gun violence. All we do is pay lip service and say it’s awful. That’s it. End of worry.

Don’t forget that we are an invading army who have occupied a foreign country for 14 years with no exit plan or even a clear military objective other than the vague all-purpose excuse, “to protect America”.

[Free Ride] Free minibus trial run planned in Islamorada after Thanksgiving. The village of Islamorada will launch its experiment with the Freebee on-demand transportation service soon after Thanksgiving. The service, free to passengers who call for service by smartphone app or regular phone, will operate two electric minibuses from Thursday through Sunday on Upper Matecumbe Key during a six-month trial period

[Metal Art of John Lopez] Among the ranches of South Dakota, artist John Lopez is welding unbelievable assemblages of scrap metal and discarded farm tools. His constructions are larger-than-life recreations of bears, bulls, horses and more, all imbued with the spirit of the wild west. Video

[Welfare] How come we hear that social security is running out of money, but we never hear that welfare is running out of money?  The first is money that people worked for, and the second is given to people who didn’t.
Michelle Coldiron won the District 2 commission seat left vacant by longtime county commissioner George Neugent, who chose to run for Marathon City Council instead of running for re-election this year. Neugent, lost a close four-way race for two at-large seats on the Marathon City Council.


[Alternate Truth] Tequila comes from cactus and cactus is a plant.  Therefore, tequila is a salad!

[Captain Bligh’s Escape from Murderous Natives 1789] Nageete wanted me to stay to speak to Eefow; but I found he was encouraging them to the attack, and I determined, had it then begun, to have killed him for his treacherous behaviour. I ordered the carpenter not to quit me until the other people were in the boat. Nageete, finding I would not stay, loosed himself from my hold and went off, and we all got into the boat except one man, who, while I was getting on board, quitted it, and ran up the beach to cast the stern line off,  notwithstanding the master and others called to him to return [they would cut the rope],  while they were hauling me out of the water.  I was no sooner in the boat than the attack began by about 200 men; the unfortunate poor man who had run up the beach was knocked down, and the stones flew like a shower of shot. Many Indians got hold of the stern rope, and were near hauling us on shore, and would certainly have done it if I had not had a knife in my pocket, with which I cut the rope. We then hauled off using the grapnel at the bow, every one being more or less hurt.

At this time I saw five of the natives about the poor man they had killed, and two of them were beating him about the head with stones in their hands.  We had no time to reflect, before, to my surprise, they filled their canoes with stones, and twelve men came off after us to renew the attack, which they did so effectually as nearly to disable all of us. Our grapnel was foul, but Providence here assisted us; the fluke broke, and we got to our oars, and pulled to sea. They, however, could paddle round us, so that we were obliged to sustain the attack without being able to return it, except with such stones as lodged in the boat, and in this I found we were very inferior to them. We could not close, because our 23’ open boat was lumbered and heavy with its 18 castaways, and that they knew very well: I therefore adopted the expedient of throwing overboard some cloths, which they lost time in picking up; and, as it was now almost dark, they gave up the attack, and returned towards the shore, leaving us to reflect on our unhappy situation.  The poor man I lost was John Norton: this was his second voyage with me as a quarter-master, and his worthy character made me lament his loss very.

[“Clueless reader”] “If anyone welcomes the illegal immigrants into the Keys they will be banned from happy hour” That was humor you twit! Talk about having the hate bug, you need help, and fast, before you hurt someone. There’re so many sick people that can’t read and just don’t get it in the Keys. No wonder we’re crashing.



[Happy Veterans Day] These banners should grace every town, as a reminder of how great our Country has always been.  Never forget the sacrifices made by our great men and women. I am proud to be an American!

The next meeting of the Big Pine Computer Club is coming up this Saturday, November 10, 10 am at the senior center. Full Menu > Ongoing Events
[“Everything free under Socialism”] There is only one group of people who think like that. They are the uneducated, older, conservative, folks of America. Where do these people come up with these ideas? They make it up or get it from disreputable hate sites. I never hear liberals talking about socialism as a good idea. Everyone knows that socialism and communism are both failed political and economic theories. The popular liberal theory for the last forty years has been “modified socialism” where government provides security, justice, welfare, healthcare, and education for all. Every bit of that is paid for by taxes. That beats capitalism, hands down.
[Advertise in the Movies] The Marathon Cinema, located with The Marathon Community Theater inside of The Marathon Entertainment Center, is known for playing First Run Movies in a comfortable home style atmosphere. It is a place where locals meet on a weekly basis to watch movies together.

In the weeks to come advertisers will come to life in movie format, and become part of an hour long Pre-Show that will play recaps of local events as well as promotional movies for upcoming local events. Showtimes are two evening shows, weekend matinees, and lunchtime shows.

[Oh, Lucky Me] Greetings, Please do not be offended by my message. I’m Mrs. Nazira Sarkis, the Minister of State for Environment Affairs in Syria. This is the 7th year of the civil war in our country. My people have been passing through extreme difficulties, so much shelling, killings and people taking horrific risks fleeing to other countries. Some of us that are still working with the regime are being forced to do the job. But now, I have made up my mind to leave and escape from this hostile working condition since I have gotten enough resources I can start a new live outside Syria. The only problem I have now is to get a reliable and trusted friend I can send the funds to for safe keeping till I come over…
[“Government makes nothing. It only takes”] I might add that government takes and distributes money. We vote to control those endeavors.
[Gross Domestic Product] Top GDP countries from 1960 – 2017.   China’s rise is amazing! Animation
[Friday Joke] Mr. Young: “I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything.”
Dr. Geezer: “Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient’s mouth.”
Mr. Young: “Oh, no you don’t — that is Gasoline!”
Dr. Geezer: “Congratulations! You’ve got your memory back. That will be $500.”
Mr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.
Mr. Young: “My eyesight has become weak — I can hardly see anything!”
Dr. Geezer: “Well, I don’t have any medicine for that so, “Here’s your $1000 back” (giving him a $10 bill).
Mr. Young: “But this is only $10!”
Dr. Geezer: “Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500.”Moral of story: Just because you’re “Young” doesn’t mean that you can outsmart an “old Geezer”




When did they remove the flame adjustment lever from Bic lighters?

[Convict Voting] I reckon that Republicans had better enjoy the elections of DeSantis and Scott while they can.  The amendment restoring voting rights to felons will produce another million and a half voters, most of them likely Democrats.  I doubt Florida will ever see a Republican win a statewide office again.
Will the lower Keys ever have a Representative that represents the Lower Keys? Not as long as the Keys hasve County-wide voting instead of single-district voting. As I predicted, 2 commissioners from Key West, 2 commissioners from Marathon, 1 commissioner from Key Largo, and zero commissioners for the Lower Keys. It’s all about the money and government of the money, by the money, and for the money.
[Visionary] The polls haven’t even closed yet, and I know who the District 2 Commissioner will be. It’ll be the Marathon resident and mayor. It just so happens that she lives in that tiny strip of land in Corporate Marathon that was gerrymandered to be moving 534 Voting units from the lower Keys to the rich side of the 7 Mile Bridge, therefore giving the City of Marathon 2 commissioners, and 0 commissioners for the poor side of the 7 Mile Bridge. The spin given by those in power is that everyone is affected by all the commissioners’ votes, therefore we should be able to vote for all of them. If that sophomoric logic is sounds right then we should be able to vote for every Representative and Senator in every state because their votes affect every one of us. Bring back those 534 voting units to the poor side of the 7 Mile Bridge and let us have our own Commissioner.


[Winn Dixie] Weekly ad. Link

Q: Why do Keys contractors charge some much?
A:  They think they’re dentists!
[Too Much Hate] Hate is such a strong word. It’s terrible. I personally hate anyone who uses it.

[Friday Joke] A funeral procession pulled into the cemetery near Beaufort, SC. Several carloads of family members followed a black truck towing a boat with a coffin in it. A passer-by remarked: “That guy must have been a really avid fisherman. “Oh, very much so,” responded one of the mourners. “As a matter of fact, he’s headed off to the lake as soon as we bury his wife.”

[Sinatra on Hate] And now a message from (a very young) Mr. Frank Sinatra. Video
[“Why the sewer lawsuit verdict was omitted in the online Citizen”] Sanitized news not wanting to tick off the Bubbas. Grinder pumps are not as newsy as a woman who drove her car into a person killing them –while she “spoke to God”.




Happy Veterans Day. Freedom isn’t free. Thank you for my freedom!

[Free Veteran’s Day] Although Dolphin Research Center will be closed Saturday and Sunday for a private event, they are offering free admission to veterans, military and their accompanying spouses and children on Monday, November 12. Just bring military i.d. or other proof of service to 58901 Overseas Hwy, Marathon 33050
All this racial business is being pushed by those who want to see America die off and taken over by the NWO. Whites were the majority, but the media has control of the information and who controls the information controls the not-so-smart public. This was all planned back in the 1950’s and it is working because the thinking intellectuals cannot get the correct information out to the pubic.
[Lonely in Paradise] The Florida Keys are a haven for individuals — or were. The old saying of the Keys Disease (drinking) is not really the most prolific thing —  loneliness is. It drives people to be introverted and hide in their abodes sulking in their misery. The only outlet is working to off set one’s boredom or hanging in the hundreds of bars soaking up strange brews and other poisons. Having a mate is paramount, but in the Keys that is almost impossible, due to the lack of acceptable opposite sexes. No, the Keys are not the Paradise pictured in the magazines for sure! (Ed: an appropriate post on the first day’s appearance of our new motto: Paradise Does Not come Easy.)
[Fix Military Housing] Two U.S. senators on Monday called on the Department of Defense and one of its largest landlords to fix housing hazards documented by Reuters at military bases nationwide, including a Marine compound in southern California. Link
[Welfare] I just read the Konk Life blog and want or demand we rename the Florida Keys the welfare Keys or the bloodsucking Keys. It will be more suited to the losers who live here on the dole!


[Old Pisser] I can still walk the walk, it just takes longer because I need to stop every hour to pee.

[“Not welcoming illegal aliens to happy hour] The poster will remain happy if people who welcome illegal aliens are not present.
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