2013 May

Monday, May 20, 2013

The Coconut Telegraph

Anonyomous letters to the editor with pictures

The Original Unsocial Media

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an knocked out


[The Final Blow] Putney: I’m done opposing No Name Key electricity. Link    

 I have a beautiful house for sale in Eden Pines. Please watch this Video. ~Nira Tocco

[Peacock Manifesto] Word or rumor is that the Key Deer Refuge is at it again. Sneakily trying to have the peacocks from the island “relocated”.  What can we say about the veil of secrecy once again surrounding this issue.  I believe it to be true as the peacock population has been significantly reduced in the past few months and several county employee have confirmed this. If everything is on the up and up then why try so hard again to hide this.

tail best anBy all standards these birds absolutely can not be moved at this time. As it is nearing the end of breeding season, the male peacocks will be losing their tail feathers.  Disruption of this cycle can be devastating to these birds.  Also the heat conditions are not right for transportation at this time. The females are either on eggs or they have hatched within the past week or so.  Is this ethical treatment for these animals to remove mothers from the nests and leave eggs or small chicks to die?  I think not.

They attempted to do this several years ago and denied, denied, denied it, but finally had to fess up of sorts on the whole deal. The population is not growing as 6 years ago there were 12 in a specific location and now there are only 7 left in the clutch.  A female had 7 chicks 8 days ago and now there are only 2 remaining and most likely will not make it.  Over the past 6 years there have only been 3 chicks that survived and are now slowly entering maturity. The raccoons, opossums, and let us not forget the abundance of feral cats, are all aiding in the peacock population control.

The S.H.A.R.K. truck has also been roaming the neighbors with 6 or more large trapping cages in the back.  Has the Refuge enlisted these people, from a non-profit animal welfare agency, to help them in this travesty?  If so, they will never see another penny from me or quite a few others I know.

Are they going to be shipped to a resort on Sanibel Island as the website still touts?  “Rent a cottage with your own peacock just”.  If so are we, as taxpayers footing the bill like they tried to do last time?  The National Key Deer Refuge tried to pull a fast one before but they were stopped.  Hold those accountable for these decisions and make them explain them.

Let none of us forget some of the unbelievable blunders that the Refuge has made in the past.  Remember the controlled burn that ended up burning from Port Pine Heights to the Blue Hole?  Ask some of the residents that had to be evacuated about how the situation was handled.  Waiting until the last minute to evacuate with cars and motorhomes pulling out on the one exit street with flames several hundred feet away.  In mid-August most residents hold extra gas for generators and boats. It could have been much worse, but thanks to neighbors helping neighbors get out no person was injured.  Good Samaritans went into a closed home with the sheriff to rescue a dog when the owner wasn’t home.  This is our community and we need to protect our own and that includes the animals, all of them!  In the end this was unacceptable and deemed that the fire should have never been started under those conditions.

Enough is enough! Ask questions and demand answers from the people making these decisions. Do not be afraid and let them push the wonderful people of Big Pine around.

I’m blessed that I am able to see  
The beautiful Peacocks by the sea.
On Big Pine they’ve been living here free
For as many years as the deer maybe.
Some want to hurt them and move them away
Could it be for financial reasons I say?
We must band together make them explain
Who really are these people they say complain.
Help save the Peacocks and let them live free
Or who will be next, your dog, cat, or maybe me.

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[“Censorship — Naja and Arnaud Girard and school board member Andy Griffiths neutralized Key West the Newspaper from reporting on any adverse school district goings on”] Hi there Deer Ed, what has happened to your “keep the peace” policy?  I can’t find your posting rules any where on your website. And I know I’ve seen them there before.  Did they get lost in the clouds? I ask because the above quote seems to qualify for the rules you used to invoke – including the email addresses on posts naming people

Regarding the actual post, exactly how did those named people do what that post says they did?  What are the details of that accusation? I have no knowledge or opinion of any of them, but the post is just too elusive, and that makes it irritating. (Ed: Thank you for bringing that up. I thought it referred to a news item I missed as I didn’t read the paper that morning and it was from a trusted contributor. My error. For submission guidelines see: Menu > FAQ Page. If there is anything you’d like to see included please let me know.

[Our cat was nabbed for lack of county tag] For 10 or more years now,  I have been feeding, spaying,  neutering any cats or kittens  we have found. About four  years ago we found a litter of  three male kittens under my  house.  We got them neutered and  have taken care of them,  including bottle feeding when  found.  Friday, one of them was  taken to the shelter — as a  stray. He weighs about 20  pounds and was very content.  Now he is very angry, as my  husband saw him at the shelter today. We have since found out  they are unable to locate the  paperwork for when he was  neutered. As a result, we are  expected to prepay a rabies  shot, county tag and boarding.  The sum is about $50.  Being disabled and on a fixed  income, I find this deplorable.  Someone sees him in front of  my house and just assumes he  is a stray. Other people who are missing their cats need to know  about this and the fact they  now must have a county tag  for their cat. Since when and who decided this? Can anyone tell me?  ~Linda Hindsley Stock Island (Key West Citizen)

oleo20If you’re a fan of margarine, you have none other to thank for the butter-substitute than Louis-Napoléon Bonaparte, or Napoleon III, first president of France and the nephew and heir of Napoleon Bonaparte

In 1869, rising butter costs led Napoleon III to set up a prize to be awarded to the first person who could create a nutritive and shelf-stable fat to replace butter in the larders of French homes and ships.

A French pharmacist and chemist by the name of Hippolyte Mège-Mouriés won the prize with his mixture of beef tallow and skimmed milk (yummy!). He called his mixture oleomargarine. Along the way it was shortened, and we know it today as plain old margarine. 

[Dance Band] I was at the little Tiki last night and was amazed at how small the crowd was for a Saturday night. I believe that having a duo play instead of a full band is penny-wise and pound foolish; they may save a few hundred on the band, but they probably are losing thousands in bar revenue. People go to the Tiki on the weekends to dance, drink and cut loose. I saw Tiki regulars that wanted to dance at the big Tiki, and normally they would never go there. I hope the little Tiki new owners reconsider their Saturday night “duo” strategy and get some full bands in there. Make the locals happy and reap the benefits.



Edison forgot to mention geothermal energy in his alternative energy comment Sunday.

Who is Chris?

[“Don’t wait until oil and coal run out”] Good theory, but seldom practiced.  Humans procrastinate. Necessity is the mother of invention is an old adage for a very good reason.  The other way to make things happen is to make them profitable.  If solar and wind energy are developed so that they are more efficient and cheaper to use than oil and coal, they will be in demand.

[Sneaky Insurance Increase]. I had an insurance agent call a FEMA underwriter to ask if I could be grandfathered since I was not notified of this increase prior to my closing on my home.  I was informed that I could not and would be subject to the large increase. The FEMA underwriter was asked when they found out about the increase in premiums and they stated that they had just found out as well. Unbelievable! 

Was this one of those bills that was piggybacked under another bill?  I am not looking for the insurance company or FEMA to bail me out after a possible loss. If I had my choice I would not even have flood insurance but due  to having a mortgage it is required. This 800% increase is absurd especially since it is my primary residence, 155k replacement value less than 940 sq feet single story ground level.  It has never flooded since it was built in 1975.

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Googling your symptoms when you don’t feel well is the most efficient way to convince yourself you’re dying.

[Marathon Journal] Former Marathon Vice Mayor Marjie Mearns lost her fight with kidney cancer. I know what that it is like having been in remission for now over two years. Vice Mayor Marjie Mearns and I worked on several projects together, one of which was Save Old Seven mile bridge. She was always a thoughtful and caring person representing Marathon’s resident and putting the city as her number one concern. She’s passed on to another life adventure, and I am sure she will be quite busy.

~All local media covered the brand new version 24 “Welcome to Marathon” entrance signs. At first look and see, the signs don’t measure up to the quality signs by 33rd Street Boat Ramp, Marathon City Marina, Community Park, Coco Plum Beach, and the Rotary Children’s Park. I have to admit those signs are starting to grow on me.
~Marathon’s raised parking lots should be used to avoid the Hurricane Wilma destruction of many cars. Under the Mayor’s declaration of emergency, the details should list those raised areas.

~Article Redux: There is a naval ship named after our fair City of Marathon. Yes, it is true. The second US Navy ship to be named Marathon was the Patrol Gunboat USS Marathon PG-89… (Part 2 continues below in Long Winded Tomes)



Closer and closer …

The best thing for insomnia is a good nights sleep.

Fanci Seafood will be closed on Sundays until August. Everyone have a great summer!


As for Gators and Crocs being more numerous in the eighties and nineties you are simply incorrect.  There are a lot more now than then due to conservation and hunting restrictions.  By the way, the same is true for a lot of other animals including the manatee.  There are more now than there were when the first European set foot on the continent.



[Hurricane House] This new house under construction in Port Pine Heights is the first I’ve seen where they place the basement above the ground. The driveway and garage are where the first floor is supposed to be. This is the first truly hurricane proof house I’ve seen. 

They probably cut back on the yellow light time to reduce the amount of time drivers have to build up speed when they see one and race to the intersection trying to beat the light.  Lower speeds there reduce the damage and mayhem during the inevitable collisions.

wave fish an


[Boat Snobs] I wave to every boat down here just in case I need a tow.


Google’s share price is over $900, up 50% from last year. Apple’s is stagnating around $430. More than 900 million devices are powered by Google’s Android operating system, up 400 million from last year.

Apple hasn’t had a new thing since Steve Jobs died, they just rehash existing devices. Microsoft still has its head up it’s OS. It seems only Google is coming out with a new device or service almost every month. Link



[Deer Feeding] We have a major problem on West Shore Drive with residents feeding Key deer.  Don’t you follow the law not to feed them? I know they’re cute and you’d like to pet them, but feeding them is harmful to the species. 

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The gun problem solved by logic post was very clever. How accurate it is, is another thing. Lincoln shot in 1863? When the first statement is wrong it makes you wonder.

eat man an


[Gleaning] There is an endless supply of people and not enough crocs and such.

[Maintenance] I drive past a memorial for Jim each day on Watson Blvd here on Big Pine.  I am not sure who put it there or who is responsible for the upkeep of it, but it sure looks like it is time to do something with it.

[“Don’t wait until oil and coal run out”] Good theory, but seldom practiced.  Humans procrastinate. Necessity is the mother of invention is an old adage for a very good reason.  The other way to make things happen is to make them profitable.  If solar and wind energy are developed so that they are more efficient and cheaper to use than oil and coal, they will be in demand. 

an_fireplace[“Fire was the first TV”] Norwegian Wood a 12-hour miniseries shown this winter on Norway’s government channel NRK, “National Firewood Night,” was conceived as a full series, then cut to “only” 12 hours, eight of which focused entirely on a live fireplace.

Nearly a million people tuned in to the series, and at one point 60 text messages came in complaining about whether the wood in the fireplace should have been placed with bark up or bark down. “Firewood,” said the show’s host, “is the foundation of our lives.” A New York Times dispatch noted that a best-selling book, Solid Wood, sold almost as many copies in Norway, proportional to the population, as a book’s selling 10 million copies in the U.S. 

[Killing Crocodiles] Crocs are not endangered any more, they went from 300 to about 2,000, but they can be a threat to our pets and children. I don’t have any young children any more, but any father with one, I think, is entitled to protect his child. Don’t you?



[Burial at Sea]Miami man offers full body burials at sea for $500. Business is booming. Link 

[“Flood insurance increase”] This link concerning the new flood insurance increases is very informative. Link


I have to admit that flats fishermen are stuck up and do think the water is there for them only, I was a flats guide in Stuart some years ago and was starting to think like they do now.


You know what they say about flats fishermen with little boats — they have big rods!

Lottery officials say the latest Powerball jackpot figure results are still pending. They had estimated it at $600 million. With four of every five possible combinations of Powerball numbers in play, someone is almost sure to win the game’s highest jackpot. The problem, of course, is those same odds just about guarantee the lucky person won’t be you. The chances of winning the prize remain astronomically low: 1 in 175.2 million. That’s how many different ways you can combine the numbers when you play. But since about 80 percent of the possible combinations have been purchased, lottery officials say it’s likely the winning ticket could be selected

How it is done:  You have odds of 1 in 175.2 million to pick the winning number. Only if 100% of the tickets (numbers) are purchased (never will happen) can there be a guaranteed winner. So, if only 80% of the tickets (numbers) are bought, that leaves 20 % of 175.2 million or 35,040,000 numbers left over

Now the The Great Computer God hidden somewhere on this rock says, OK, the fools bought the tickets and sales have stopped, so let’s pick on of the leftover numbers and get the scam built up a couple of times, then we can get the fools to buy again and pick the last number left for Uncle Charlie (better known as The UN-Person).   Next week we can do it all over again, because people are hopeless idiots.  We are not going to talk about ‘float’ in the banks of all the cash that gets interest.

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[Insurance Increase] Do the tornado areas pay such high insurance rates as us in the Keys?

[Insurance Increase] What happened to FIRM? 800% increase for ground level homes? Cancel my membership.

[Insurance Increase] 800% will wipe out half the locals in the Keys. Oh, that’s the plan, eh? Will it is time to call my agent Mr. Spalding to make some adjustments to the greedy insurance companies, right?

[Pigeon Key Bridge] Flagler spent $80m of his own money to build the railroad down through the Keys. Now the Monroe County taxpayers and other Florida taxpayers are being told we will have to pay $20+ millions of dollars to re-build and maintain the Pigeon Key bridge (old Seven Mile bridge), and just a minor incidental $1/2 million off ramp, just  so a few people could drive their pickups there.  

All this spent money is in spite of the fact that the place is usually deserted in spite of the quarter million dollar a year ferry we are flushing money into. all this money to support a foundation that no one is interested in enough to visit.  Are we all really just stupid sheep?  If so, then we deserve this massive hosing.  I’d like to see an honest accounting of every penny of this money before it gets lost in the shuffle.



A basket of cute.

[Insurance Increase] Yes, your mobile home even though it is worthless will probably require a flood insurance policy which is also worthless.  Our government at work taking care of us.

heart pulsate an


In the world of romance, one single rule applies: make the woman happy. You’ll get extra points.

Tell her she looks great with her new color hair. (+20)

Tell her she looks like a model after all the exercising. (+30)

Tell her she looks like the girl you met before you married her! (+50)

[Flats Fisherman] I know Josh, J.T. and Nate who run out of The Wharf on Summerland.  They’re great guys who love what they do. A word of caution, if you’re not into fishing, don’t get Nate started.  That guy is a treasure trove of fishing stories and he loves telling them.  One of the nicest Keys kids you’ll ever meet.


[Sneaky Insurance Increase] A lot of people were caught with their pants down on this one and some might lose their homes. I thought FIRM had stopped such increase



Smoking stunts your growth.

[“When’s the last time you had a flats fisherman wave hello to you as you passed each other or say hi you you at the boat ramp”] Uh, every time I go by when he’s underway.  Since my house is not a trailer on a dry lot, I have a boat lift, so I don’t interact with them at the ramps. Try not being a douche bag; I know a lot of the guides down here and most are very cool people and very willing to talk fishing with anyone who shares their passion.


[Boat Snobs] Actually I have never had anyone wave to me from a boat down here.  Evidently the locals don’t think it’s cool or they can’t be bothered.

religion politics zone

1 in every 7 American’s are now receiving S.N.A.P or food stamps. 1 in every 5 people in America are receiving government assistance. During the great depression there were bread lines that were visible to the naked eye. Today the bread lines are replaced by food stamp cards. If people were to stand in a bread lines today to receive food, the streets would be over run and make the great depression look like a company picnic. The unemployment rate is more like 20 percent. We realize that “figures don’t lie~it’s liar’s that figure” . Cyprus was a testing grounds for the bankers to loot accounts to see how the public would react to the theft of their savings. What until the Police,E.M.S and first responders have their 401’Ks and pension plans looted, only then will we see change in this country. P.S I voted for Dr.Ron Paul.


If your religion promotes killing non-believers, beating women, punishing rape victims, or selling your daughters as wives at 12, you’re not praying to the God above, you’re praying to the one below.



More words of wisdom from a half term quitter and professional grifter.

[Guns] This burglar had a bad day and shoving this homeowner in his closet may have been his worst move because that’s where he keeps his guns. Video

[FTRG] Glad you are back and well.

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an businessbot


It’s good to see the FTR guy is back. All FTR needs now are a few more new parts installed and he’ll be a new man–a bionic man. 

How come FTR doesn’t know that the administration contacted the people in Bengazis embassy twice asking them if they needed more security before the attacks and they told them. “No”.

Wonder how many more Bengazis would have happened if the Republicans got their way and cut millions more from security. They proposed much larger cuts then were already planned. Thank heavens there cuts didn’t go thru.

[Umbrella] Yo FTR! Both Bushes and Ronald Reagan had military men holding their umbrellas too during a speech they gave at one point or another. Are they all right or all wrong? You can’t have it both ways.



[Umbrella] As I always say Democrats do anything its the biggest deal ever. Republicans do the very same thing and its glorified as the most wonderful, amazing, most heralded event ever. Pssssst … these people are not all Obama.

[Gun Control] On Friday, May 17, fifty-five of sixty two Colorado Sheriffs filed a civil rights lawsuit in Federal District Court in Denver, against two anti-gun bills passed by the Colorado legislature in March.

“Did you really think that we want those laws to be observed?” said Dr. Ferris. “We want them broken. We’re after power and we mean it.  There’s no way to rule innocent men. The only power any government has is the power to crack down on criminals. Well, when there aren’t enough criminals, one makes them. One declares so many things to be a crime that it becomes impossible for men to live without breaking laws. Who wants a nation of law-abiding citizens? What’s there in that for anyone? But just pass the kind of laws that can neither be observed nor enforced nor objectively interpreted – and you create a nation of law-breakers – and then you cash in on guilt. Now, that’s the system, Mr. Rearden, that’s the game, and once you understand it, you’ll be much easier to deal with.”


right only grey

unemployment20Mr. Obama has a true friend in yesterday’s poster who was all grinned up about the national unemployment rate and the average number of jobs that have been created since last November. Just for the record, in April we only created about 165k jobs, that’s according to Obama’s Bureau of Labor Statistics. The friend of Obama somehow is proud that Aprils job creation total is 20% less than the average from November till April. Deer Friends, April’s jobs report was lousy news on at least two fronts.

First: In order to return to the unemployment rate that we had when the Democrats took control of Congress in 2007, at the current employment rate, it will take us about 6 years. I trust that you will remember that our employment picture was rosy during the years of Republican governance. When the Democrats took control of the Legislative branch it was 4.6%.

Second: In April, the unemployment rate reached 7.5 percent, its lowest level in over four years. Nonetheless, during this time the proportion of Americans with jobs has not increased. Currently, 58.6 percent of U.S. adults are working, a number that has barely changed since 2008. The participation rate is well below the 66% to 67% rate that was normal over the last 20 years.  It is true that our economy is recovering slowly, very slowly. Any recovery is a good thing.  But we hired Obama to fix our economy and to fix it fast. He has failed on nearly every count. Our recovery can best be described by the fact that the rich are getting richer, and the poor are getting poorer.

an_secret_agentsPart 2) Now the IRS is under the microscope, and the picture being revealed is frightening and nauseating. Over the last few days  we’ve learned that Obama’s IRS has devolved from its role as being the collector of taxes to being a tool of those in government who are determined to smother voices that are contrary to the views of Team Obama.

Deer Friends, that is scary as hell. But it’s not the first time that it has happened, it happened under FDR under Kennedy and under Nixon. This time Obama’s IRS set out to quash any voice from any group that mentioned the words “patriot, the  Tea Party, or constitutional studies”. Any group that criticized government spending, government debt, or taxes was targeted.  The IRS focused on any group that was involved in advocating or lobbying to make “make America a better place to live. The IRS singled out groups that advocated education about the Bill of Rights, the Constitution, or that criticized Obamacare.

The IRS systematically delayed the granting of non profit status to any such organization, while granting such status to liberal/democrat groups quickly and with little or now investigation.  Even worse the IRS demanded that such applicants must provide membership lists that included names and addresses. They demanded membership lists, copies of speeches that had been delivered, copies of materials distributed, lesson plans for training sessions. The IRS demanded ‘names of the donors, contributors, and grantors’ and insisted all the volunteers be identified. None of the foregoing sounds like the legitimate inquiry by a legitimate government. Just now we are learning that the IRS may have given it’s data to  Team Obama. Did I mention that it was only Tea Party and similar groups that were singled out for such persecution?

It now appears that the Obama administration was aware of the forgoing as early as 2010 and took no action. The huge question is was the Obama Admin  the driving force in this possibly criminal activity by the IRS. It’s worth noting that the person that led the charge against the Tea Party et al is now in charge of implementing Obamacare in the IRS which is the MacDaddy of Obamacare. This abomination is only now heating up, but it could very well be Obama’s Watergate.

Part 3) I urge you to check out the following, it’s worth your time. Link


It’s a free Country, the people of No Name can sell the houses they own any time they desire.  In fact, they don’t have to hook up to the grid if they don’t want to, or, now they can use any combination of grid power, solar power , wind power , fire power,  water power, hamster power, but probably not atomic power, that they want to.

Karl Marx (on Republicans) “The rich will do anything for the poor except get off their backs.”

In a series of rulings, the PSC sent down one message: The 43 homeowners on No Name have a right to connect to the Keys Energy Services power grid so they don’t have to continue to rely on solar and generators for power. Link


(Part 2 continued from the aboved Marathon Journal post) … the Patrol Gun boat USS~Marathon PG-89. PG stands for Patrol Gunboat. This ship was named in honor of Marathon, Florida; Marathon, Ohio; Marathon, New York; Marathon, Texas; and Marathon, Wisconsin. ~The USS Marathon was commissioned for service 11 May 1968 at Tacoma, Washington. ~The USS Marathon ship’s crest symbolized its mission with an emblem and motto emblazoned on a shield.~The crest contains elements surrounding a battle by Greek warriors on the Plain of Marathon. In 490 B.C. Greek countrymen saved Athens from Persia at the Battle of Marathon. ~The USS Marathon PG-89 was a brown-water vessel designed to operate in shallow waters and rivers, primarily to address perceived Cuban threats at the time. Patrol gunboats like the Marathon were heavily armed and suited to riverine warfare. They were particularly good at drug interdiction operations as well. They featured gas turbine engines that are now predominate in today’s Navy. ~The USS Marathon was the first patrol gunboat to earn the Green “E” and “C”. These awards were for excellence in engineering and communications respectively. They earned these awards on 5 September 1969. ~Also in 1969 the ship was painted in camouflage for special upcoming operations, the first combatant painted this way since World War II. ~The USS Marathon eventually served three tours with distinction in Vietnam. Other operations were conducted off Singapore, Taiwan, and the Philippines.

These ships and other vessels in time evolved into today’s modern special warfare branches and even today’s Navy SEALs. ~SEAL stands for Sea, Air, and Land. The US Navy decommissioned the USS Marathon 31 January 1977 at the naval base located at Little Creek, Virginia. She was then transferred to the Reserve Fleet.~In April 1977 the USS Marathon was transferred to the Massachusetts Maritime Academy. They loaned the ship to the Naval Sea Cadet unit near Cape Cod. The Marathon became the T/S Marathon. T/S stands for Training Ship. The ship was used for naval training and as testing platforms for the new gas turbine engines.  ~I could not find the date that the Marathon was scrapped, but Internet sources seem to indicate that the ship ended up at a Beaumont, Texas scrap yard. In all probability, the ship was stripped and no longer exists. The service of the officers and the crew, though, will always live on.  

The City of Marathon received several letters from a member of the Patrol Gunboat Association asking for a city flag and a proclamation of thanks. In June 2005, I was asked to write the proclamation to honor the ship and the crews. Of course, I was honored to write the city proclamation. The officers and crew who served aboard these patrol gunboats put their lives on the line for our liberties. I personally thank them and owe them my deep appreciation.    ~L. E. Shaffer, USN Chief Warrant Officer 3, Retired

~Skin cancer caught early is no big deal. Wait and perish. I have regular checkups; all clear thus far. Then my annual dermatology appointment found skin cancer all in the earliest stages. The meds prescribed are some nasty mix that works. Don’t wait to be inspected by your favorite dermatologist; it could be your life.

~December 1970 National Geographic talks about pollution including one oil leak from an oil platform. That sounds eerily familiar doesn’t it? Frankly, many issues before and after report on the delicate environment, and what we as humans are doing to the environment.

~Budget season is coming soon. The smart taxing authority starts work now to encourage resident full participation. So, if no one shows up to complain, does that mean the budget is perfect?

~Windows 8 is too much change too soon without any classic setup option. Having the classic version right alongside Windows 8 is what it should have been in the first place.