2013 January

Sunday, February 3, 2013


[Islamorada Illegal Rental Police]  Seems to me hiring someone to focus on that issue could very well be worth it. Much is spoken of those illegal rentals, but not much is said about the taxes that are not paid on those illegal rentals. Tax reports are filed by those of us with legal rentals, yet the illegal rentals get away with rampant tax fraud. This is not just an Islamorada issue, it’s obviously all through the Keys. Even when people are caught red-handed illegally renting, tax fraud seems to go by the wayside. Case in point, today’s Citizen has an article about Cay Clubs, including Cristal Coleman, wife of Fred “Dave” Clark. Cristal was a Cay Clubs Manager, Fred “Dave” Clark was the President & CEO of Cay Clubs. According to today’s Citizen report, in 2009, under the direction of Mark Kohl, charges of fraud regarding vacation rentals were dropped against Cristal.

The report says Prosecutors initially obtained a warrant accusing Cristal Coleman of failing to remit $39,000 in bed taxes to Monroe County–a second degree felony, but never charged her with a crime.

Legal rentals must charge 12.5% in taxes to the rental amount; which breaks down as 7.5% State of Florida sales tax, and 5% going to Monroe County bed taxes. As a hotelier, I can say for a fact that I am aware of several illegal rentals actually charging the extra 12.5% tax and then not remitting it, since they are illegal rentals. I only wish all cities and the County had the resources to actually hire full time people to crack down on the illegal rentals.

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Joe and Meri-Lynn Britz presenting J.C. and Colleen Massey of the Methodist Community Food Bank with a check for money collected on the “Coconuts” Christmas Tree. Donations by their patrons and matched by them for $630.00.

White flies are normally kept under check by small black ants that live in the ground and travel up and down trees to eat them. If you spread poison to kill off all the ants in the yard because some came into the house to get water, then that would explain why White flies are causing a problem.

I suggest you hire Orkin and have them come out and inspect your situation, recommend you trim vegetation away from the house, clear the poison in the yard and introduce a new batch of black ants which will take to eating those White flies up for you.

Only keep bugs out of your house, and reduce only some in the yard (like mosquitoes) less you disturb the natural order of things 

[National Tragedy] Every day  22 veteran’s kill themselves. Support the troops. War is Hell. Link



[Pig Roast] I enjoy this site and saw the blurb on roasting a pig. I live in West Palm, but also have a place in Cudjoe. I use a caja china to roast pigs for friends and church about 3 times a year.  You can order a pig from Publix. 

When are you doing your party? I have my son’s wedding shower at the end of March, but other than that, you are welcome to use my roaster. I could probably be easily persuaded to roast it for you. I don’t do this for a living and am not looking to make anything from it.

[Cay Clubs] I remember those dirt bags. I did not buy one line of their B.S. and don’t feel a thing for anyone that got sucked in by the stories they spewed. Seems to me we hear a lot of plans and see nothing. Does MarlinBay ring a bell? What a bunch of losers. 



The families at the Big Pine Key Flea Market appreciate your business and thank you for your continued support. The Flea Market is open Saturday 8 AM to 3 PM and  Sunday from 8 AM to 2 PM

[Islamorada Vendetta Officer] Full time job to sniff out illegal rentals.


[Whiteflies] A few weeks ago someone in my neighborhood upwind from me unleashed a sickening toxic smelling vapor that blanketed the area, indoors and out,  for quite a while.  I’m guessing it was a stab at killing the white flies that inhabit the coconut palms around here.  It wasn’t as bad as Bhopal,  but I thought it was an inconsiderate thing to do.   Guess I should move back up north, right?



[Pig Roast] Can I come to your party? I don’t know how to roast a pig, but I’m a great drunk!

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The deepest point in the Earth‘s oceans is the Mariana Trench in the Pacific Ocean–a whopping 35,797 feet below sea level or the complete length of Big Pine Key standing on end!  Now that is a deep ditch!  35797 / 5280 = 6.8 miles

[Crooks]Cay Clubs’ interests ran the gamut. Link



[Movies] I flipped on the TV this afternoon and what do I find on TCM? Key Largo with Bogie, Bacall and Edward G. Robinson. All were in pressed suits, starched white shirts buttoned all the way to the top, vests, knotted ties, long pleated dresses, lots of jewelry, perfectly coiffed hair – even the Indians had on a semblance of ties. Isn’t that way now! 

In one scene the old sea captain, Lionel Barrymore, was saying when the rains cease, the temperature drops and the winds subside (no wind in the winter? please!). There are three months when the Keys are very livable. All you have to put up with are the tourists – and this was in 1948! Guess the more things change the more they stay the same.

[Whiteflys] I used to have infestations on the two gumbo limbo trees on my property. Then I cut them down. If the county wants that to be a protected tree then they should “protect” them. They know 90% of them are infested with whiteflys and they do nothing about it. Don’t waste your money on treating for whiteflys because all your neighbors have them too.

an horn band


The Horn Section? Please stand! No one but the British… Link

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Andre Cassagnes, the inventor of the Etch A Sketch toy that generations of children drew on, shook up and started over, has died in France. Cassagnes came upon the Etch A Sketch idea in the late 1950s when he peeled a translucent decal from a light switch plate and found pencil mark images transferred to the opposite face.

[White Flies] I had similar problems with whiteflys and had a local guy come spray them. He had a serious backpack sprayer and reached the tops of my 25 foot palms easy. At only $15 a tree I was sold, and it seems to be working well. He said he can do a ground (root) soak also. He pressure washed my black sea wall too. Give him a shout “

fine-woodworking-ad 1.7.13



President Obama shooting skeet at camp David. Let the Photoshop conspiracies begin.  

[Man Flu] (men flu): An illness that causes the male of the species to be helpless and sicker than any other family member. In females; a cold.




When life knocks you down, roll over and look at the stars.


Insanity in individuals is something rare – but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule.  ~Nietzsche

an_shopping_cart_long[Attention All Kleptomaniacs] This month, we are asking all of you to kindly return any stolen supermarket shopping carts you may have snagged throughout the years. We’re not sure exactly what you’re doing with them or what manner of heinous game you might be playing, but consider all the poor shoppers who will go cartless due to your selfishness.

Now, we’re more than happy to lend you a cart, for a reasonable fee of course. But outright stealing? Pft.

And while we’re on the topic of stolen shopping carts, please return any milk crates, bread trays, ice cream baskets, and other food containers you may have lying around your stash. We’re trying to run a business here people!



S. Fla. provider begins installing cell phone antenna systems near homes. Coming to a Key near you? The antennas, known as a Distributed Antenna System, are designed to fill in dead zones. Link

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It looks like Boonedocks are really screwing over the snow birds now. No more happy hour after all these years and now charging $50 for a table to see a performer lip sink his songs. Looks like a good time for our BPK campground to blacklist this one. ~Unhappy camper.

Springers-Prime-Rib00     Doerfels-at-Springers

Prime Rib Dinner    Live Music


Cay Clubs was $ 300 million Ponzi scheme. Link 




Orange – Coconut French Toast recipe. Link

Sedona, Arizona Time Lapse Link

an halfmast



[Faded Glory]  Anyone who honestly thinks this country is the pits should travel a bit, or quit complaining and try doing something positive about what they want changed.  

[Wildlife Services kills endangered River Otters]  The target is most often beaver. Wildlife Services body-grip traps – which consist of two square bars of steel that snap together like the jaws of a crocodile – have killed more than 7,800 animals by mistake over the past six years, more than any other agency tool. The list of non-target victims killed includes more than 85 species, most native and many aquatic, from wood ducks to snapping turtles, green-winged teal to alligators. No casualty draws more concern than the chocolate-brown river otter, which is the focus of widespread conservation efforts. 84 percent of otters caught in Wildlife Services body-grip traps since 2006 – 2,350 of the 2,800 animals – were killed by mistake, records show.

The image of the federal government accidentally killing hundreds of rivers otters each and every year is especially unfortunate in light of the money and effort expended in at least 21 states to reintroduce this member  to their native mammal fauna.

Agency records show that for every 45 beaver killed on purpose in body-grip traps since 2006, one otter has died by accident. Turtles are common collateral damage, too. Ninety-nine percent of all turtles killed in the traps are unintentional. This brutal, sledgehammer approach to wildlife management must be stopped.  It’s time to abolish this out-of-control government agency.



RIP Barney Bush, who died with a higher approval rating than owner George W. Bush.

[White flies] Before you blow another $400 on pesticides, run by the depot and pick up a pressure washer. If you’ll pressure wash the nasty critters off the leaves of both the tall palms and the shorter bushes every week to ten days you’ll escape this renewed cycle of devastation. You can clean the honey-do off everything while you’re at it, because it does indeed eat the paint. 



North California oak tree.

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[“Cooking a pig”] Everyone has their own preferences, just allow plenty of time. In the Pacific they dig a pit, build a fire, wait for the fire to die down to coals, wrap the pig in spices and damp banana leaves, put down more banana leaves, settle the pig onto it, and layer various veggies, also wrapped, on top. A sheet of corrugated metal roofing goes on top of that, and dirt on top of that. Dinner is served the next day. No last minute prep other than sliding off the roofing and hauling everything out. Similar thing is done in a split 50 gal drum, but not as many hours are required. Only time I ever tried spitting a pig was in a 3rd/4th world country where I could afford the labor and beer to get someone to turn the spit for hours. 

Pot is a great repellent, it keeps smart, good-looking woman away really well. Smoke ’em up dumb ass.


How sad a couple of loose cats kill a bird or spider or something. What about the a-holes that go out of their way to run over an iguana or box turtle. Worse yet, how about the shits that shot the alligator in Eden Pines last fall because they “thought” it ate their dumb-ass, not-where-it-was-supposed-to-be dog.




A huge shout out to the Marathon High School Lady Dolphins Soccer Team! They made it to the final four in the state and are playing tonight at 7pm at Marathon High School for a chance to play for the state championship! GO LADY FINS

To Do List

Make vanilla pudding. Put in mayo jar. Eat in public.

Hire two private investigators. Get them to follow each other.

Wear shirt that says “Life.” Hand out lemons on street corner.

Get into a crowded elevator and say “I bet you’re all wondering why I gathered you here today.”

Major in philosophy. Ask people WHY they would like fries with that.

Run into a store, ask what year it is. When someone answers, yell “It worked!” and run out cheering.

Become a doctor. Change last name to Acula.

Change name to Simon. Speak in third person.

Buy a parrot. Teach the parrot to say “Help! I’ve been turned into a parrot.”

Follow joggers around in your car blasting “Eye of the Tiger” for encouragement.


One aspect of having women in our military is there were an estimated 19,000 rapes of service women by their fellow heroes last year.

an flushToday’s episode of the Toilet Bowl Water Swirls.

Now the FDIC is taking a shot at Brian Schmitt claiming the board at Orion didn’t play right. Kind of amazing, considering the crap the big banks like BOA and Well Fargo have pulled over on the American public, they pick on a little guy. 

Kind of amazing that we can’t get any real arrests in a murder for hire plot, kind of amazing that an adult can walk away from a felony manslaughter charge when a minor dies DUI in his care.

Kind of amazing that a phone thief gets sent to be adjudicated but those who supported her business by purchasing her stolen wares, walk! 

Years ago the Feds came down to clean up the Keys, back when it was ruled by pirates, rum runners, drug smugglers and fishermen. It wasn’t a clean up, it was a power grab.

It’s apparent to me there’s a new power grab at hand, is it apparent to anyone else?

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[“Pig Cooker Wanted”] I know a local pig cooker he does it all call 305-304-5101

[Free Medical Equipment] I have an older model hospital bed (still works fine), wheelchair, walker and 2 potty/shower chairs (only used in the shower). I want to give them to someone that needs them but can’t afford to buy them. Must be picked up in Big Pine Key. I can’t deliver. Please call Classified Ads > Free 



Watching Tim McGraw on TV’s Austin City Limits is interesting and sad what country music has evolved to. YouTube Louvin Brothers, Porter Wagoner, Dolly Parton, Wynn Stewart, Hank Snow, Merle Haggard, Buck Owens, George Jones, Tammy Wynette, etc. to see what country music was. Just because someone is wearing a cowboy hat shouldn’t make the music “country.”

[Cat Trapping] I wholeheartedly support trapping & humanely euthanizing any free-roaming cat. If owners allow cats outdoors, they are irresponsible; they should not be permitted to have animals that destroy the wildlife that belongs to everyone

govt-ct[Captain Doom and Gloom]  “fence in a swimming pools” You can blame husbands for this who let their two legged hatcheries dictate the rules for their children, who are too lazy to train their off sprung in safety. Bring back survival of the fittest and eighty percent of humanity would disappear in a week!

Bar Talk: Bar Maids wear low cut tops not to be cooler, but to distract you from your wallet!.

There are a lot of local real estate auctions on supposedly bankrupted properties, but when you bid on them, all of a sudden the reserve is not met and the auction is void. Sounds like a scam of some sort of cheap eBay tactic to get dummies to bid online.

Is it legal to cross over the top of a snowbird’s Cadillac fenders and hood if he blocks the bike / walking path at an intersection?  Or can I just beat the crap out the paint job?

Who is making all the high profit from the high cost of gasoline these days? Seems it should be divided equally from the gas station owner back to the camel jockey who owns the hole in the ground, but is it?  We know the cost of producing a gallon has not changed or maybe even gone down, so who is making all the mullah?

It is very difficult to read the CT after passing the Warning Banner for the Political and Religious section. It forms a bias as to what to expect in spin and twisted Demo logic (it there is such a thing) than nulls all definition of common sense of what they write. So I skip it.

“Tea Party is one symptom of our decline” It wasn’t when it started, it was a sign that people wanted to change things back to a free America like we fought the Red Coats for, but no, you mutants took that and twisted it with weird sex spin, weird media hype, and anti-freedom BS from BB. The Tea Party was never anti-America ever. You sheep are fools.

“illegal vacation rentals” Just look for the NY, Michigan and Quebec tags, then bust them for tax evasion, no licenses, and pucking up my hood.

Keys scenic drive is one of the top 5 in the nation, except when you get to Big Pine Key then it suddenly turns ugly.


Just how do the gun defenders consider themselves  “a ‘well regulated’ militia” in keeping with the Second Amendment that they cite?



Is Obama trying to take his own gun away? I think not.

Obama has been rated as the 4th best president ever: A study group recently released its findings as to the best president of the United States of America. Obama has been rated as the 4th best president ever: Reagan and 9 others tied for first, 15 presidents tied for second, 18 other presidents tied for third. Obama came in fourth.

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8.5 million American’s left the labor force in Obama’s first term, but “recovery”!

Obama’s home town of Chicago should be proof enough that when you take guns away from Citizens only criminals have guns. My heart goes out to the family who’s daughter sang at the inauguration and was kill just a few days letter. Where, Chicago!


[“America is not great”] Well, do something about it. Stop this ultra left liberal BS. Next time vote for what is good for our country and not be blindsided.

Chappaquiddick,  the Surge, and Benghazi.  Three topics the Republican fascists will never let go of.


right only grey

an reviewLet’s review: In his most recent weekly address to America, Mr. Obama said: “2013 can be a year of solid growth, more jobs, and higher wages.  But that will only happen if we put a stop to self-inflicted wounds in Washington. Everyone in Washington needs to focus not on politics but on what’s right for the country; on what’s right for you and your families.  That’s how we’ll get our economy growing faster.  That’s how we’ll strengthen our middle class.  And that’s how we’ll build a country that rewards the effort and determination of every single American,”

Mr. Obama was absolutely correct. I agree with every word in that quote. It is crass power politics that have delivered us to the state that we are now in. Our plummet began in 2007. For the 6 years prior to ’07, Republicans pretty much controlled the governance of our nation. We had prosperity, unemployment was very low, our national debt was too high, but it was inconsequential compared to today. 

Beginning in about 2004 the Dems aided by a rabid press began a hate campaign against GWB and all things Republican.  They accused the Reps of reckless spending and of accumulating too much debt. They were right. Their campaign worked; in 2007 the Democrats took control of Congress. Within a year, our decline began. The Democrats fractured our economy.

Since January 2007 Democrats have had effective control of our nation’s finances. From 2009 through 2011 Democrats had full control of the governance of our nation. They set policy and set fiscal policy. From 2010 through today, the Republicans only control the House of Representatives. 

There are fundamental differences in the Democrat and Republican philosophies of governance.  Among them is that Democrats are fully committed to the notion that the government can create prosperity by massive spending of our tax dollars. The Reps believe the opposite. The Reps believe that only a robust private business sector can create wealth. The Reps believe that the government is an anchor that impedes growth and prosperity.

For the last 6 years we have seen the Democrats accumulate debt at a rate of more than a trillion dollars a year. Never forget that the Dems whipped up anger against Reps by claiming that we were spending too much. In the last 6 years our debt has increased at the most rapid rate in our history. No previous admin has spent as much, or as fact as has the Obama admin and his Democrat controlled legislature. As a result of their philosophy and practices we now find ourselves being held captive in a horrible, dank miasma of a moribund economy. We now are the product of Democrat politics.

The White House told us that it was pleased with last January’s BLS jobs report. In that report we learned that our unemployment rate had increased to 7.9%. That’s higher than when Obama took office.  The sad fact is that the true U/E rate is closer to 10%.  That is so because of the ever increasing number of persons who have quit the labor force.  Perhaps more importantly, it is nearly double the rate in June of 2007, the beginning of the end of a prosperous economy that had been forged by Republican governance.

In January we added only about 157K Americans to the ranks of the employed. That’s about 50% of the jobs added just a year ago. Please consider that we will have to add about 350K new jobs every month for 2-3 years to get us back to the pre-Democrat times. On the other side of the employment picture, we now know that just since last November, there have been  about 300K more Americans have gone unemployed.

Deer Friends, I believe that the White House, in particular, is pleased at the horrible news. Soon, very soon, they will try to embark on yet a new round of stimulus spending.  Soon, very soon, they will demand the authority to borrow even more money from the Chinese.

Perhaps it would be interesting to examine the results of Republican governance. Scott Walker is the Republican Governor of Wisconsin, he has a Republican controlled legislature.  The Dems spent untold millions of dollars, twisted untold numbers of arms, and made untold numbers of threats and promises in a futile effort to have him recalled.  The Democrat effort was actually worse than a simple defeat. It was a rout; he won the recall election with even a higher vote count than he had in the original election.  When Walker took office in ’11, Wisconsin had a 3.6 billion dollar deficit. Today, Wisconsin has a substantial budget surplus. That’s because under Republican governance the state has become “business friendly” and Walker has reformed state government. Wisconsin is now a “Right to work” state. Wisconsin’s unemployment rate is substantially lower than the federal rate. The increased employment has generated substantial new state revenues from sales taxes and withholding taxes.  Wisconsin saw a decrease in statewide school property taxes for the first time since 2006. Because of Republican reforms, state and local governments have saved over $848 million.  Walker and the Reps are leading Wisconsin into prosperity.  The Democrats and Obama are leading our nation into servitude. 

Part 2)  Maybe, just maybe my criticism of Mr. Obama and his policies has been too harsh.  Yesterday, we bought gas and it only cost $3.70 per gallon.  That’s really good news.  Gas now costs twice as much as it did when Mr. Obama took office.  That’s nice.