2023 April

Friday, April 21, 2021

The un-social media since 2002 with 60,000 followers.
Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage pick-up days,
Tuesdays and Fridays.

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[Happy 420 Day] What is the significance of 420 Day? The origins of 420 Day are hazy. The number has been linked to rumored police radio codes that supposedly indicate whether there is marijuana on a suspect, and it’s also a reference to a popular afterschool meeting time to smoke, popularized by a group of California teens in the 1970s

In honor of 420 Day. A step-by-step guide to rolling a joint. “How hard could it be,” they say before giving up entirely. Link

[“Innocent man freed”] I hope he sues. He definitely deserves more than a feel good trophy.
[Derby Day] The Lower Keys Rotary Club is hosting its annual Derby Day event, and we invite you to join us for a day of fun, excitement, and community support. Derby Day is a fundraiser that helps us support local organizations and charities. We believe that together we can positively impact our community, and we hope you’ll help us achieve our goals. This year’s event features a Reverse Raffle with only 100 tickets being sold for some incredible prizes. Shout out to our amazing local sponsors for supporting this event. Raffle Ticket Purchase
Tuesday’s mess of a post about The Edmond Fitzgerald has me thoroughly confused as to what was going on in the poster’s mind. The ship was an iron ore carrier and named after the president of the insurance company that owned her. Not a lumber company. The link is to a story about completely unrelated ships that sank decades earlier. The ship sank with all hands on the poster’s birthday on November 10, 1975 and he doesn’t know even the basic facts about her?
[Super Bloom] California’s eye-popping super bloom is one for the books. The state’s wet winter leaves flowers blooming and cameras clicking. Link
[Gay Stock Picks] To the person that relayed false information about Budweiser stock: NASCAR did not drop their contract. The stock was at a 21 month high when it dropped 2%. It has already rebounded to less than 1% lower. The false info about NASCAR was from a parody account, which The New York Post chose to go with. Perhaps the poster might want to go to a better source for their financial information. All that was said by the poster tells me one thing. We live in a great country when beer advertisements are the worst thing that people have to worry about.
How Russian propaganda has been forced to evolve. Video
[Friday Joke] Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory. The next day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager’s door. The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new employee. He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.
The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo’s all over the factory floor and they’re really beginning to pile up. At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo’s. She has a roll of plush Red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles. The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little package between Elmo’s legs.
The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several moments of hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches Lena, ‘I’m sorry,’ he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, ‘but I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday. Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles.’

[Lyrics Inuendo] James Brown in his 20’s —Ain’t Nobody Here But Us Chickens

I wanted to write something about 420 Day, but I lost my train of thought and, oh, I cna’t remember, to hell with it.
Want a green burial in Florida? Here’s what you need to know. Link





Richard Rush was kind enough to send in these three paperweights that were made in the old Big Pine Glass works. Link

[Exploding Rocket] Elon Musk’s SpaceX company’s mammoth new rocket, Starship, has exploded on its maiden flight. Video
[Perverted Gun Nut] Florida Keys cops acting on a tip find gun and lots of ammo hidden in man’s home. He is on the state’s sexual offender registry. Link
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[Friday Joke] A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.”
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?” The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
“What did I tell you?” said the barber. “That kid never learns!”
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlor.
“Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?”
The boy licked his cone and replied:
“Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!”
[Big Bullshark] A fisherman may have caught Florida’s biggest bull shark — while standing on a Miami beach. Link
The current Coconut Telegraph was published on 4/21/23 at 8:12 am.