Friday, March 24, 2017

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsSince 2002. Published Tuesdays and Fridays
Letters to the Editor with pictures

[Cats In Need] Recently deceased Sue Paul’s two extremely loving young adult black cats are at the Marathon SPCA awaiting a new home. The problem is that they are extremely skittish until they know you. Then they cherish attention. These are excellent ratters and Sue had no iguanas at all around her house. They will use a litter box if kept inside but prefer to use the outdoors. They would at times sleep with Sue’s dogs in their beds, so they are capable of co-existing if not harassed. They are happy enough to just eat Purina Cat Chow crunchies. They are truly beautiful sleek cats, and one has bright white markings against the black. Doesn’t someone need a really loving cat around the house? SPCA’s number is 305-743-4800
[Double-dipping Water Fees] Can anyone point to a law that requires those not hooked up to the sewer yet to pay the flow charge as though they were? I imagine that’s another windfall for FKAA, or does that money go back to the County in some form? Money for nothing. I’m not paying it.


I am looking to plan my wedding in the Florida Keys this fall and am interested in looking at some different options on Big Pine Key. If you could please email me with some different options that would be great.

[FTR on Term Limits]  How do you feel about term limiting elected officials?  If you’re like three out of four of other Americans, you are in favor of term limits.  Term limiting elected officials is becoming the new norm.  Here in Florida our state legislators and our governor are term limited. In many Florida counties, cities, and municipalities the voters have decided that elected county and local board members must be term limited.

A number of years ago board members of the Florida Keys Mosquito Control Board attempted to seek legislation that would term limit that board.  But, that effort was quashed by the majority of the board, incumbents all. Some of those same board members ultimately voted themselves life time health insurance.  As result you and I are on the hook for millions of dollars in liability.

At last Tuesday’s Florida Keys Mosquito Control Board meeting the issue again was put forward.  Chair of the Board, Phil Goodman, stated that he was in favor of term limits, other board members suggested that they too favored term limiting their board.  New commissioner, Brandon Pinder spoke in favor.  His comments show that he is honoring his campaign dialog wherein he stated that he favored term limits. That takes courage and a true commitment to public service.  The Board decided that the issue would be brought up for further discussion at their next meeting.

Should the Board vote in favor of term limits, prior to implementation, it would be necessary for the Florida legislature to pass a local bill.

If you really want to see an improvement in our local governance, I urge to let your views be known.  I suggest that you email the Director of the Florida Keys Mosquito Control Board and urge that they adopt term limits. Link

[“Has anyone had their house painted recently”] Jim Rutherford just had his painter do our house. Terry is the bomb, he works for Rutherford. Clean, fast and neat as he goes. Lots of prep before he painted, lots of cover when he painted. We did a primer first then painted. The environment here is harsh on everything, it’s worth it to maintain your house.



Homeless camp in the lower Keys.

[“Underseas Dive Shop closed”] It’s a shame. Yet more proof the old-time Keys and its laid back, cool, one human family, is dead. Thanks Maryanne, Sky and the Rockett family for decades of local kindness.
[Mote Marine] Who else is going to pay for Mote’s new monstrosity building? Mote may get some tourist dollars but they are also privately funded via grants. Did you ever visit the old facility? It was falling down, yet they were growing coral in tanks. That’s more than Sean Morton at NOAA ever showed me. Do you understand Mote bought that land when the water was cleaner? They are making a permanent commitment to the Keys to study the issues and try to save what’s left of the dead reef — and it is dead, trust me. I remember the purple, orange, greens and blues, the hoards of angelfish, and tropicals, that were once at Looe Key, Sand Key and the Western Sambos. Disease and too many people, afraid when they get water in their mask or snorkel, standing on it. I’ve seen it, I was a dive master in the 1980s.




Florida traffic signs.

[“Coral die-off”] Anyone who thinks the coral die off isn’t bad must have just got here because I left 3 years ago because when I would go to near shore waters it made my cry on how bad things have become
I’m actually pretty good in bed — I hardly ever fall out anymore!
[FTR on Zika] The other day a poster expressed an interest in Zika.  Good!  Zika has not gone away, it is resting, it will be back when winter turns into summer. Remember hot, wet weather brings mosquitoes.

Even though the Zika threat has fled the media, that fact is that there have been at least 28 reported cases of Zika in Florida so far this year.  13 of those cases involved pregnant women.  Not so funny huh?

Those areas of the world that have year around summer still are still hard hit with Zika.  Tourists from and Americans going to those venues bring the virus back with them. Nearly the entire Caribbean is under a travel advisory by our CDC. Nearly all of South and Central America is under the same travel advisory.  Nearly all of Africa….every county with a hot, wet climate is affected.  Zika will be back — soon — very soon. Zika will be back here in S. Fla, and in Monroe in just a few weeks, you can take that to the bank.

Here in Monroe our Mosquito Board is engaging in a trial of the Wolbachia virus to control the vector.  And, as soon as the FDA grants approval, will likely begin trial of using genetically modified mosquitoes to eliminate the vector.

My wife is a recycling freak, she will wash out jars, plastic bottles, cans and sometimes wrap things is paper to put them into the bins. I took her down to the city dump and showed her that the trucks all dump their loads into the same freaking pile of debris. She still does not believe they do that. Is this grounds for divorce?
[“Chuck Berry – Johnny B. Goode”] Chuck Berry stole that song from Charles Hogan – what a bitter story, then Louis Jordan and then Chuck Berry. Look it up on Wikipedia. I was disappointed to read that, but he did a nice job. Link


Florida sheriff gets thank-you note from mother of arrested teen girl. Link

[“Hurricane evacuation”] Maybe you should look up a few pictures of Hurricane Andrew instead of the 1935 hurricane. Most of the buildings here were built before that horrific incident, but luckily for them it was just wind. They didn’t get that thing called a storm surge. If you want to stay during a hurricane you best be good at survival. If it hits the whole state we won’t exist. If we lose a bridge you better have lots of rum, or we aren’t going to help you.
[“Underseas Dive Shop closed”] When they 1st opened they were next to the Sea Center, (“What is the oldest business on BPK?”) My guess, with the same owners, is True Value Hardware, Good Food Conspiracy, health food store, and Coconuts Bar & Liquor Store.
[Captain William H. Bethel] Key West Commissioner Harry Bethel’s ancestor. The son of a Bahamian wrecking captain, William Henry Bethel came to Key West with his parents in 1 825. Under his father’s guiding hand, he became a skilled seaman and, by 1832, a wrecking captain in his own right. He married a fellow Bahamian, Caroline Mott, in 1832. The following year, Caroline delivered the first of their seven children
[Why We Need Uber] Do you know which of our Commissioners opposed having Uber operate in Key West? I’m asking because I had a really bad experience with Five 6’s yesterday afternoon. I rode the bus to my doctor’s appointment yesterday at Dr. Catana’s office on Roosevelt Boulevard. When I got out I saw that I would have a nearly 90 minute wait for the next “green” bus. I called Five 6’s for a taxi to take me home. After waiting over 30 minutes I called again and was told a taxi would be there in a few minutes. Another 20+ minutes went by and still no taxi. I called again and was told it would be just a few more minutes.

At the 80 minute mark I looked at my watch and knew the bus would arrive soon so I made my way across Roosevelt Blvd and took the bus home. While on the bus I called Five 6’s again to tell them to forget about sending a taxi because I was on the bus on my way home. I proceeded to tell the dispatcher my displeasure for being lied to and she hung up on me. I called again and she refused to answer my call.

I am now a proponent of Uber operating on the island. I have read nearly every review of Five 6’s I could find and most of them are horrible and most of them single out the dispatchers as being particularly bad. I would like to know who voted against Uber coming here

[“House paint”] I had O.R. painting (Office 786-327-6630) on Big Pine paint the interior of a 3-bedroom house and Oscar’s crew did it in two days. I’ve never seen such neat painters. They also paint exteriors.

As for the poster’s question, if you are painting the same color all you usually need is a pressure wash and one coat of paint. Some tinted priming of the bad areas may be required. There are many different considerations, but it’s normal for just one coat.

[“Term limits”] I applaud FTR for trying to revive the topic of term limits. I would like to see a national poll on the subject. I’m rabidly in favor of them. How can you have fresh ideas with the same worn-out old heads? We want to change our government but wont. Term limits will change our government and put an end to “political machines” and entrenched lobbyists who would lose their grip on the politician’s cajones.
Why parenting is basically like living in a horror film. Video
[Cheyenne and Sioux] Arrows. at the shaft’s side and near its end. The blades were in a row, close together, and were tied there by rawhide after having been set into a slot. They projected out three or four inches from the heavy shaft. Sometimes the edges were straight, sometimes they were pointed so that they resembled a section of sickle bar for a mowing machine. Always they were kept sharpened to a keen edge.

Indian Necklaces: The Sioux wore necklaces, regularly in single strands. The Crow necklaces ordinarily were in multiple strands. Later the Cheyenne adopted the fashion to some extent. Mostly they designed them in single strands, like the Sioux. The multiple curved loops of the Crows became also fashionable among us Cheyenne.

Indian Feathers: Eagle feathers stuck up from the back hair of many a Sioux. The number of such feathers worn by any one man was supposed to denote the number of enemies he had killed.

Cheyenne and Sioux: All Indian lodges coming under my observation were built on the same general lines. The conical tepee was the standard form. Buffalo skin was the standard material for covering the lodge poles.


Key West home, at 707 South Street, featured in James Bond’s “License to Kill” sells for $5 million. Link

Monroe County and Key West Sanctuary Cities? I sure as hell hope not. We have enough problems with the riff-raff, the weirdoes and the bum trash down here. With developers and new want-to-be politicos taking their shares of our islands, there won’t anything left of paradise for us humans! But of course, I can always sell out to a New Yorker for millions, right?
Travelling the road will tell you more about the road than the google will tell you about the road. Coconuts is not a place. It’s a eclectic experience. Eclectic: adjective, deriving ideas, style, or taste from a broad and diverse range of sources: tradesmen, commercial & sports fishermen, people of the woods, the last of the hippies, hospitality workers, retired folks, poets & philosophers, call the “NUT” home. A rip in the fabric of time you can slip & sip right through.  Rock’in you right since 1983.
P.S. The very best drink prices in the Florida Keys.

These two young folks spoke very little English. They were here on holiday form Europe and wanted their photo taken. If that’s as tough as it gets, we have it made. I think they emailed themselves one. The NUT is a funny place, many visitors who find us make it their spot. They are taken back, Nut-a-mania sets in, and they feel the love & can’t believe the drink prices–they become a local. Everyone wants to be a local for the week or so that they are with us, don’t they? We can help you with that. Stop by, say hi and chill with us. We are the ones who have been: “Rock’in you Right at the Light” for over 30 years. We must be doing something right.  ~Coconuts <@)}}}><

Another Muslim murderer happened in London. How come all terrorist are Muslims? What are Muslims noted for? Terror and fear. No Muslims = no terrorist.
[Trumpcare] Here’s where it gets nasty. Both Democrats and Republicans who are against the bill will now start to trade their “yes” vote if they are allowed to add their own pet bill to it. Politics as usual. Meet the new boss, same as the old boss.

The Who – Won’t Get Fooled Again



This fire truck on BPK is all business and shine!

[“General Gordon under siege at Khartoum 1887”] I see someone else is interested in history. The British lost Sudan to the Mahdi, or false prophet, because the British would not convert to Islam so the followers of the Mahdi tried to kill them all.

“I am the Mahdi, the Successor of the Prophet of God. Cease to pay taxes to the infidel Turks and let everyone who finds a Turk kill him, for the Turks are infidels.”

The followers of Islam have been killing what they refer to as “infidels” since the seventh century. President Bush made the mistake of waking them up.

[Crook] Bank teller Kunia Ja-Kay Rodrigues, 31, was arrested last week for theft of $18,000 from First State Bank of the Florida Keys.
[No Floating Signs] A County draft of the ordinance prohibiting them states “No sign, banner, or other device which shall be displayed upon a vessel, floating structure, or other water born structure anchored or moored on or over submerged lands nor may any such signage be directly anchored to or floated above any submerged lands.”
[Putin Justice] A former Russian lawmaker who became a vociferous critic of Moscow following his recent move to Ukraine was shot and killed in Kiev Thursday by an unidentified gunman. Link
[Friday Joke] The Ugly Duckling. Three old maids die and arrive in heaven at the same time. When they get there, St. Peter says, “We only have one rule here in heaven: don’t step on the ducks!” So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first woman accidentally steps on one.

Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest man she ever saw. St. Peter chains them together and says, “Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly man!”

The next day, the second woman accidentally steps on a duck and along comes St. Peter, who doesn’t miss a thing. With him is another extremely ugly man. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for the first woman.

The third woman has observed all this and, not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly man, is very, very careful where she steps.

She manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, then one day St. Peter comes up to her with the most handsome man she has ever laid eyes on, very tall, dark hair, muscular and hung. St. Peter chains them together without saying a word and walks away.

The happy woman says, “I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?”

The guy says, “I don’t know about you, but I stepped on a duck!”



The old Boca Chica Bar today. What a change!

Anarchists are fixing Portland’s pothole problem. Link
[New Penti Discount Card] Today I was in Winn Dixie and signed up for the new Penti card. Reading the fine print I will get 1 point for each $2 of groceries purchased. 1000 points will give me $10 off at Exxon or Mobil stations. So spend $2000 to save $10 on gas.
The Winn Dixie fuel perks card that is being phased out gave 5 cents off per gallon of gas at Shell for each $50 of groceries purchased. So for $1000 of groceries I got $1 off per gallon. If I purchased the maximum allowed 20 gallons that would save me $20.
Old card = $20 gas savings per $1000 of groceries, New card = $10 gas savings per $2000 of groceries.
So bottom line is the new Plenti card is worth only 25% of the savings vs. the old fuel perks card. Hardly worth while unless you buy A LOT of groceries.
And by the way, if you are concerned about privacy the Plenti card requires you to reveal a lot of information about yourself and your buying habits, and gives the issuer, American Express, the right to share that information pretty widely.
[“Junk mail”] There are two ways to handle junk email. One is to only receive from your those in your Address Book, and two is to order everything the advertisers sell with a bogus credit card and ship it to your Governor’s address.
Monday was International Happiness Day, a United Nations-sanctioned holiday intended to remind people worldwide of the importance of working toward happiness in their lives. It was a big failure. Everyone’s miserable!
There is new definition for P.C.— Pacifist Controlled or better, Pacifist Copulation. The way things are going we are not going to make it.
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