2013 April

Monday, April 22, 2013

The Coconut Telegraph

Like Letters To The Editor With Pictures


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[Earth Day 2013] An estimated 20 million Americans participated in nationwide demonstrations marking the first Earth Day on this date in 1970. Be good to Mother Earth, she’s the only one we’ve got.

[Marathon Journal] -Monroe County School Board has failed residents yet again. School Superintendent Mark Porter hired Drake who has had similar financial hopscotch from his last job; now he will be right in a big fat tub of taxpayer money. Ed Davidson and John Dick seem to be the only voices of reason. The Martin brothers defy reason and common sense.

-Is Key Largo once again going to try for incorporating as a city? Certainly, the taxpayers will see their money spent on 100% of Key Largo. Islamorada and Marathon have been quite successful in making residents confident in their local government. I have always said that at least graft and corruption will be limited to the city.

-The Coconut Telegraph is back from a well-deserved vacation. Any and everything newsworthy and controversial are back to make one shake their head in disbelief. Everyone is heard through the Coconut Telegraph. Go to Contact Us and make contact. Maybe you will meet an alien or two.

-A bad hurricane season will happen and is overdue. Are we prepared especially local governments in the Keys? A reserve fund for each government entity has to be established and kept at a total sufficient to run a local government for six, nine, or twelve months. Marathon survived several hurricanes because they could start recovery the next day. There was money for all of the city’s needs. Marathon contracts with a company to manage that recovery. Eventually, Marathon gets its money back from FEMA. O, when is a hurricane exercise scheduled, June is coming soon.

-Keynoter delivers smack down on Citizen’s Insurance at Link

-Summertime and men’s swimwear are a funny topic only for the overweight guy in a Speedo thong. Once when I was but a boy my mother bought me Speedo-type swimwear. I never felt out of place even at a swim party; I wasn’t the only one. Now board shorts are society’s supposed standard. Those board shorts must hang down as far below the knees as possible. My townhouse complex swimming pool has one rule that only appropriate swimwear is allowed. Does anybody know what that is?

-Keynoter hits another out of the park with workforce house issue in proposed Rockland center. Whoever thought affordable workforce housing is no longer needed should take the South Florida bus from whence they came. Henry Ford had it right paying good wages so that the workforce could afford to live in decent housing. And more importantly, those workers could afford a Model T themselves.

-Citizen reports about how FDOT will pay half of funds to rehabilitate the Old Seven Mile Bridge, but only if the county takes over responsibility for maintaining the span. Pigeon Key pays for itself, which a constant stream of visitors can attest. Plans call for a pedestrian bridge. Anything else is overkill. A ferry system only adds to the charm. For naysayers who think it costs too much for too little usage are delusional at best.  ~ Publisher@MarathonJournal.US




[“Toilet paper never goes to waste’] Everyone you love could live without you, but they couldn’t live without toilet paper.



[Cheesy Bacon Pierogi Bake] Ah, real soul food from the gods! Link 

[“Big box store coming to your Key”] Occasionally we can be our own worst enemy. Talk of a big box store coming to your Key is not a reason to immediately consider relocating or closing your business. First recognize that you may need to make a positive change in the way you do business. Then, assess whether or not you have the desire to make those changes.  You probably don’t and are lazy.

[Internet Tax] Congress will vote on taxing the Internet this week. 
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holmes22hotel22[Serial Killer] During the six months of the 1893 Chicago World Exposition there was a mass murderer, possibly America’s first, named H.H. Holmes who had a pharmacy and 38 rooms above it called the World’s Fair Hotel. Holmes preyed on the 27 million visitors to the Fair and admitted to murdering at least 27. The hotel had secret rooms. One room was used to suffocate his victims and another one would gas them. He had a torture chamber in the basement.

The Exposition and the hotel both burned to the ground. Video 

[DirecTV] Tired of your cable and U-Verse monthly bills going up? Don’t call the DirecTV 800 number. Call SammySam the DirectTV man. I am your local authorized DirecTV provider. Lock in your price for 2 years. I’ll come to you for sales, service and installations. Free NFL Sunday Ticket & MLB. Free HBO, ShowTime, Starz & Encore. Get the Entertainment package with over 140 channels and locals for only $29.99 a month for 1 year. Call SammySam 305-896-3017

an flood lighthouse


[Port Pine Heights Secret Plan] Those telephone poles laying on the ground by Key Deer Blvd are part of a FEMA-Obama secret plot to take out all the illegal downstairs enclosures during the next hurricane flood. 

[Guns] To the guy who likes huge gun ammo magazines and his wife doesn’t: I would like you to be using a shotgun when you opened up on the terrorist in your house so you would be less likely to nail innocent me two blocks down the street sitting in my home watching the news on TV.

[Toilet Paper] As long as the subject is toilet paper, have we all noticed how much shorter and thinner the roll is, and also the size of the tube in greater to allow them to hold a smaller amount of sheets.


For any of you old enough to remember the Key Lime Pie Band they will be at Boondocks tonight starting around sixish. If that’s not too late for you, stop by and say, Hey!

The non-profit InsideClimate News won a Pulitzer prize for reporting the “Dilbit Disaster/ inside the biggest oil spill you’ve never heard of.”  A seven month investigation into the million gallon spill of Canadian Tar Sands oil into the Kalamazoo River in 2010 and ultimately into national pipeline safety flaws and the hazards of diluted bitumen. Yes, same stuff as Arkansas & Keystone XL.


I was told that King Farouk has purchased the University of Miami. The name will be changed to Farouk U.

[“Big Store on Rockland Key”] I am not a good consumer.  I buy groceries, gas, basic personal needs, pet food, and that’s about it.  I don’t frequent Kmart and have gone months without setting foot in it, because I don’t need anything. A big store on Rockland Key probably won’t make much difference to me anyway.  My expendable cash is at a minimum.  I don’t spend the gas to drive a hundred miles round-trip to Costco either, and that, at least comes under the category of needful things like groceries.  I don’t think I’ve been in the Florida City’s Walmart even once … maybe once.  The parking lot is always packed no matter what time of day I have driven by on my way home from visiting the family in Central Florida. daytime or the middle of the night it’s packed.  However, when I do need something I would love to have a better option here in the Keys besides Kmart, Sears, Ross’ and Beall’s.  I can’t afford anything at the little tourist boutiques in Key West who are complaining about the shopping center costing them local business.  That’s a huge lie, no local shopped at their stores anyway, their prices are way too high.  

So I am not a big consumer, but I do like nice things, good quality things, when I need them. I think the Keys would welcome a quality store, with some good quality secondary stores in the same mall.  We need the jobs the shopping center will offer too. 600 employees is a lot of jobs, and two shifts’ worth of jobs.  I support the shopping center on Rockland Key, I might even break down and go shopping there once in awhile. 

Be open to a little haggling where price is concerned if you are worried about a big box store coming into the Lower Keys. More price negotiating goes on in your “Mom and Pop” stores than in the big box stores. Bargain shoppers know the independent retailer has the power to negotiate a sale and these customers are more inclined to shop where they feel they set their own prices. Remember, it is all about the customer’s perception. 


I use a ceramic “steel” to sharpen my kitchen knives, but it has too much residue from the steel of the knives that needs to be removed to be tip top again. I wipe it down with a dish towel after every sharpening, but traces of the steel embed in the pores of the ceramic and now it won’t sharpen the knives as well as it did. What will remove the blade residue?

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[The Voice] There is a voice inside of you that whispers all day long. “I feel that this is right for me. I know that this is wrong.” No teacher, preacher, parent, friend or wise man can decide what’s right for you. Just listen to the voice that speaks inside. 

[Mass Murder of the Day] 5 dead, including suspect, in shooting south of Seattle. Link


[“Rockland Key shopping at a big box store”] While big-box retailers carry a vast array of products, finding them can be a challenge.

Do not shop at a big-box retail store when you are hungry. A hungry shopper is a hurried shopper, and you may miss details. Making a plan will save you time and hassle. 


[Volunteers Needed] Big Pine Academy’s Field day is this coming Friday, 4/26.  The kids are going to be able to blow off some FCAT steam, eat some hot dogs and get sprayed down by the fire department:).  We need parent volunteers to help blow up balloons and fill up water balloons for some of the field day activities.  There will be sign up sheets in the cafeteria and we will provide you with the supplies.  Please sign up for easy volunteer hours that you can do from home.  

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[Tech Term of the Day] Domainer] A Domainer is an organization or individual that profits from the manipulation of and speculation in the Domain Name market. Domainers specialize in the bulk purchasing of new domain names and existing but expired domain names they believe will be profitable in the future.

Let’s say, for example, that the domain name expires. Most Domainers would jump on snapping up that domain; they’d purchase the rights to by filing the $10 registration fee and then sit on it. Either the owner of the domain would come searching for it after they realized they let the domain expire or the Domainer would sell it to another interested party. Either way such highly brandable domains routinely go for $500 to upwards of a $10,000–netting the Domainer a return on investment anywhere from 500% to 10,000%+ in the process. Some scum will do anything not to work for a living! 


[Volunteers Wanted] Florida Keys National Marine Sanctuary is seeking volunteers at the Florida Keys Eco-Discovery Center in Key West to interact with and educate visitors about the Florida Keys marine environment. Interested applicants should be able to contribute a minimum of four hours per week, have an outgoing personality and enjoy meeting people from all over the world. Duties include greeting visitors and answering questions about Florida Keys National Marine Sanctuary and adjacent National Parks. For more information and to apply see Classified Ads > Wanted

an covered wagon horse


In 1889, the Oklahoma Land Rush began as thousands of settlers were allowed into the state to claim land at high noon.

[The Toll of Time] I felt so poorly yesterday, that I cancelled a half-day fishing trip with a Key West guide amigo, which I had booked for me and my old amiga from Wisconsin, who arrived Friday evening after a long delay in the Atlanta airport due to weather. We got to do lots of catching up and philosophizing, and we took in the new Tom Cruise movie, “Oblivion” at the Regal Cinema yesterday afternoon in Key West. Then, we had a nice early Cuban dinner at El Siboney. By then, I was starting to rally somewhat. No way I could have spent 4 hours on the water under the sun. How far have I fallen – I used to be on the flats from sunrise to sunset, poling a skiff, chasing grey ghosts (bonefish). Maybe I chase them in another way now. Maybe I’m chasing my tail.



[Heat Sensor] This image of a boat is from 1935 feet up, what they saw on their infrared detector screen. The body’s feet are forward facing. This tells me they can see us glowing through our roofs anytime they want. I wonder what the satellites can do.

Check out my friend’s video from 2005 “How the Terrorists Won”  Video

[“Redneck lover”] I love rednecks too. That was a profound statement you made. “the only one shot last night was a cop with a gun”. As if the gun caused him to get shot. But you were right, only one person got shot, but 4 people died and 170 injured without the use of a gun. Without the use of a gun. Let me repeat that again. Without the use of a gun! 



Florida becomes 4th State to sue BP over Deepwater Horizon oil spill.

Walmart sells cheap crap



[A Must Have] I’ve got to get me one of these!


Cut the cord and get Netflix for $8 a month. All you can ever watch without the brainless commercials. I did and don’t miss regular TV in the least, especially the news.

BimboModel[Captain Doom and Gloom] DEF: Sacrilegious n. 1. A word derived by con men in dresses to rebuttal sane people who laugh at the mysticism religious nuts live in. v.  2. A secret term used by priests for tea bagging.

DEF: Money n. A worthless system to control those who think it valuable until all hell breaks loose and then rename it toilet paper. SEE: Barter System

DEF: Marbles n. Objects politicians play with under their desks, lose quite frequently, trade for favors and walk on in Congress.

DEF: Drunk n. Anyone obsessed with themselves in front of a buxom barmaid needing more stimulus to provoke a sexual encounter before going home to an ugly wife.

DEF: Wife n. A temporary human associate authorized to procreate a viable offspring or another fem fatal by gaining independence and value.

DEF: Kids n. A unauthorized miniature human running amok until drafted or discarded into the real world to create more unauthorized accidents.

DEF: Spot lights n. Those security lights your neighbor has on all night, that make owning a BB Gun worth while!

“guns” The bad guys can get weapons anywhere, and they do not buy them from legal vendors. The back ground check will stop the inept, but not the hard cores. If all firearms instantly disappeared world wide, people would be clubbing each other to death. Sharp pencils anyone?


[Foreign Aid] Our governments at all levels, Federal through county, are struggling to make the right decisions in how it spends money and yet we graciously give billions of financial aid to hostile nations all around the world.

mccrystal22I watched an interview of General Stanley McChrystal on CSPAN.  He was the head of our special forces in Iraq.  He said releasing the pictures of the Abu Ghraib prisoner torture resulted in a huge surge of new recruits for al Qaeda and the insurgents resulting in much greater danger for our troops.  

We had our “surge” and they had theirs.  So much for the benefits of torture.

[Hindsight] To FTR on Boston bombing manhunt: Armchair and lounge chair quarterbacking is exactly that

[“Things that happened while Ed enjoyed his vacation that FTR will never share”] Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas) compared same-sex marriage to bestiality. “It’s kind of like marriage when you say it’s not a man and a woman any more. Then why not have three men and one woman, or four women and one man, or why not somebody has a love for an animal? There is no clear place to draw the line once you eliminate the traditional marriage.

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don22Dear Don FTR,

I refer to you as Don because you’re the Godfather of the Right. I kiss the ring on your finger with respect to the Don. But it seems to mesmerize me how you misinterpret what was written concerning Marco Rubio. You see, my philosophy is that when one is physically standing up, and they lean to the right, or to their left too much they will go off balance and fall. Well, the same applies to all those people who are extreme left or right wingist. They lost their ability to balance their logic, views and opinions.

Your assumption that I’m a Liberal, is absolutely incorrect. I’m neither a liberal or conservative. I do not put any labels on my views and standards. Out of gratitude, I gracefully thank you for attempting to remind me which party was and is responsible for the 1995 revision of the Cuban Adjustment Act of 1966. But, then again, I’m fully aware of this. What you seemed to forget or mention is that the only party that has ever done anything concerning Cuba, or Cuban refugees, were all Democrats. From JFK, LBJ, Clinton. Yet the Republican Cuban American Senators and Congress in Miami, refuse to do anything for their refugees. This is where the hypocrisy begins. Democrats look out for Cuba and Cuban refugees, but in Miami they push for the Republican promise that Cuba will be set free. A carrot dangling on a stick.

Another of your misconceptions Don FTR, is that I’m a peeved poster, including me with the “Hate filled line of the left”. Wrong again. I will  assume that you may have experienced life in Miami, and may have had  personal experiences with the new wave of young Cuban refugees coming to our shores. It may be possible that you have personally met and maybe even have friendships with the old exiled Cubans, but there’s a big difference between the exiled Cubans, and the young refugees coming to our shores. I lived in Miami for well over a decade and I couldn’t understand the animosity the old exiled Cubans held against the newcomers. They even nicknamed the new comers “gusanos” (worms)! Why? Because many of the refugees that come here do not want to work, and seem to be less educated. They prefer to live on welfare and off the government. That’s what the exiles have told me countless times. I personally know many that I’ve tried to help, but who just didn’t want to work. Instead they looked for the easy way out. I also knew many that realized that what many refugees, that have gone back (visiting) to Cuba to show their friends and family how fantastic life is in “La Yuma” (USA), have realized that you either have to work your butt off, or get involved in some illegal activities (which is easier money), and out of disappointment returned to Cuba. Some never even bothered to go pick up their work visa, but they sure did go pick up their green card.

The truth of the matter is that the reason why we have such a large population of illegal aliens in this country is solely due to our government, and the lobbied politicians that take bribes to look the other way when corporate America wants to make larger profits to stuff more money in their pockets. How’s this? The American farm, crops, poultry and meat industries bring in vast amounts of illegal aliens to work for meager wages, and when the illegal employee wants a raise, or suffers an accident while working, they (the corporate managers or foremen) lay them off without any compensation, and don’t even return them back to their country. They leave them here to fend for themselves. This is what Marco Rubio, and both parties should be addressing, but then again, he’s being lobbied just as most politicians in this country are. Both Republican and Democrat. Balance Don FTR, balance!


right only grey

radical-islam-threatThe Obama response to any terrorist attack is a knee jerk denial of the fact  that AQI and it’s clones are alive and well. He has refused to label the Fort Hood mass murder by a radicalized Muslim Army officer as being terrorism. Team Obama dismisses it as being nothing more than “work place violence.”  Team Obama did all in its power to label the Benghazi murders of American State Department officials as being nothing more than mob violence. Ultimately they were forced to acknowledge that it was terrorism delivered by an AQI clone. We know that AQI and its allies are winning in Afghanistan, they are surging through the mid-east and Africa. Iraq will soon be in the complete control of Muslim fundamentalists.  Face it folks, Muslim fundamentalism is winning.

Nonetheless in his State of the Union address to the American people earlier this year, Barack Obama declared that he was “confident” of achieving “our objective of defeating the core of al-Qaeda”.  Although he acknowledged the need to pursue the “remnants” of the terrorist group and its affiliates, the overall message was clear – al-Qaeda was badly degraded, the tides of war were receding and the US was winning this fight that was no longer even officially a war.


The Boston bombings and sundry other acts of terrorism are a fundamental challenge to that assessment. Boston reveals that terrorism is on the streets of America. I trust you will remember that there have been several botched attempts by jihadists to place bombs in various American venues.  We have been very fortunate that Boston is only the first one to succeed since 9/11.

We know that the brothers were radicalized jihadists. We know that from their acts. We know that from their web postings, we know that because Russia identified the elder brother as being a likely jihadist.  We know that because the girl friend of the elder brother proudly displayed a license plate that said “Terrorista2”.

We now know that the FBI is hard charging an investigation into a “sleeper cell” of about a dozen associates of the brothers.

It is crystal clear that the complexity of the global Islamist threat and the fact that it cannot be confined to wars in distant lands, or fought at arm’s length using drones. And yet the Obama administration has quietly yet insistently led America to believe that fable.