2014 June

Monday, June 2, 2014

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The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsThe Original Unsocial Media. Anonymous Letters to the Editor with Pictures. Published Daily by Noon Since 2002. No Saturday Edition

ant line2
[Ants] I spread ant granules around the base of my house, have two different ant traps next to each other about the kitchen, the cat dish is suspended in a larger bowl filled with water and we still have ants all over the place. One kind of ant is a short black chubby type and the other is the tiny brown pissant or sugar ant. There must be some product that will rid us of house ants. Does anyone know what it is?
[“Smithfield Farms sold to China”] I would start eating my neighbors, but they have been eating the same contaminated Chinese food too. Can’t win.
[Phone Time]
With the advent of electronic devices that all include accurate time, is there still a phone number to call for the time?
[Blind Date] Be careful when you pick up a partner in the Keys. Video
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The June AARP calendar is out. Full Menu > Ongoing Events
[Sarcasm] Oh happy day, Hamas and the Palestine Liberation Organization have officially united as one big hate group. We will now have peace and happiness in the mideast.
[“VA Mess”] Veterans hospitals and clinics should be the “ultimate pinnacle” of care that all other hospitals strive to be like. Unfortunately they fall short of that.
coffee pour
I want to give a thumbs up to the new Florida Keys Cafe on Ave. A in Big Pine.  What a fabulous transformation:  what was once dirty and drab is now refreshingly bright and cheery.  It is clean, the menu has a nice variety, our breakfast was just fine and the staff is friendly.  Kudos to a wonderful renovation!  I hope our locals support this new venture.
[Caterpillars] Can someone please offer advice about how to get ride of the caterpillars that are eating my beautiful yellow flowering vine?
[“Neighborhood thief on the prowl again“] All of that and he is still lead free — amazing.
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[Parody] The new iWatch from Apple. You knew it was only a matter of time (bad pun intended). Video
[“Eimers killing”] The police report claims Eimers left after the original stop without his drivers license.  If this is true, maybe he was fatigued from driving.  If he drove from Michigan to Key West non stop I can understand his brain not working logically.  I’ve driven many times 24+ hours non stop and I can tell you it’s going to cloud your thinking process.  There obviously is more to the story than is being told. The KWPD is lying about how the stop ended (with murder) so why would anyone believe the KWPD about how the stop and subsequent “chase” began?
[“Speeding dump trucks”] call DOT, they have their own police and they just love to screw with truck drivers. A few years ago a local bobcat driver had his truck parked at Coconuts after dark while he was inside filling up and the DOT guy waited outside until the driver left and gave him a ticket.
[“Real Estate reality show”]
Big Pine’s Nira Tocco will be featured on “Buying the Beach” on Comcast channel 113 and HD 466. Direct TV channel 286 and Dish channel 194. Video
The School Board wants to raise taxes a half cent. Based on the county’s deceptive 1 cent sewer  tax increase, I say no! We won’t be fooled again.
The internet pretty much has created a bunch of people who believe their opinion means way more than it actually does.
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propeller ss
. OMC V-4 Stainless Steel Prop. 12 x 17 $115. OMC V-6 Stainless Steel Prop. 14 x 19 $75. Needs a $75 re-hubbing. Call Classified Ads > Boats
[Eisenhower talking about Douglas MacArthur after the 1932 Veterans Bonus March] During the military operation, Major Dwight D. Eisenhower, later the 34th President of the United States, served as one of MacArthur’s junior aides. Believing it wrong for the Army’s highest-ranking officer to lead an action against fellow American war veterans, he strongly advised MacArthur against taking any public role. “I told that dumb son-of-a-bitch not to go down there,” he said later. “I told him it was no place for the Chief of Staff.” Despite his misgivings, Eisenhower later wrote the Army’s official incident report which endorsed MacArthur’s conduct.
[Micro-aggression] I just read about a new term coined by our social science folks called “micro-aggression.” Now you can be labeled a racists for just thinking about it.
dunce2[School Board] To Ron Martin and Andy Griffiths, The Monroe County electorate owes both of you a big “Thank You” and I could not agree more.  Three seats on the school Board are up for election and it looked as if it was going to be a very dull, ho-hum campaign.  There did not appear to be any captivating issue(s) in the individual races or the election as a whole.  That being the case, it would not be an easy task for the voters to decide how they were going to cast their ballots.Fortunately for us voters, you two have taken the proverbial bull by the horns and singlehandedly created an issue that will surely excite the voters.  The worst kept secret in Monroe County is your joint decision to ask your associates on the School Board to extend Mark Porter’s contract as superintendent before the August election.  Bear in mind that Porter’s contract does not expire until July 31, 2015, fourteen months from now.  Phrased differently, Porter is barely halfway through his initial three year contract.

As the little boy supposedly said to “Shoeless” Joe Jackson when Jackson was accused of helping “fix” the 1919 World Series: “Say it ain’t so, Joe.”  Ron and Andy, tell me it ain’t so.  Tell me that the Coconut Telegraph has gotten it all wrong with the reports that you intend to induce a lame duck School Board to extend the contract of a superintendent who has done precious little to suggest that he deserves an extension.

Please hit the “Reply All” key and tell us if the rumor mill has gotten it all wrong and you have no intentions of recommending to a lame duck Board that Porter’s contract be extended over a year before it expires.  I would like nothing better than to apologize profusely for purveying misinformation.  Conversely, please hit the “Reply All” button and tell everyone that it is your intention to go forward with a renewal initiative prior to the election.

It would be very interesting to hear now your explanation and justification for the premature extension.  Regardless, it will become a significant, perhaps the most important, issue to the voters.  At least two incumbents, yourself, Ron, and John Dick, will have to explain your votes, whatever they may be, to the electorate.  That will take an otherwise moribund election season and add some real spice.  Voters who may have been otherwise disinterested in the School Board races, may have even stayed home, will surely pay attention to the campaign rhetoric.

Ironically, a similar situation exists in Marathon.  The city manager has resigned and a temporary appointee is running things.  The City Commission discussed the situation and determined that the appropriate thing to do was to continue with a temporary city manager until the Commission elected in November took office.  Their posture was that a lame duck Commission had no business saddling the new Commission with their choice of a city manager.  Rather, they thought that the new Commission should decide.  I could not agree more.

Perhaps it would be best if this year’s elections for the School Board are treated as a referendum on Mark Porter and the concept of an appointed superintendent of which he is the first.  I have heard it said that the leadership emanating from the Henriquez Building is so bad that perhaps Monroe County should return to an elected superintendent.

I have also heard that the extension of the ½ cent sales tax for capital improvements is likely to fail.  The argument is that voters are dissatisfied over the financial and recordkeeping fiasco on the HOB project in particular and the absence of quality leadership in general.

In any event, I want to thank you for bringing to the fore an issue that will surely rivet the attention of the voters.  Perhaps the give and take over retaining Mark Porter will be the foundation for a more spirited election than we have had in years.  Thanks again.

Our recently released “POW” may have been not-so-much, according to a soldier serving with him at the time of his ‘capture’.  I’d worry about him being the next domestic terror incident in the making. Link
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pig-farm-china[“Smithfield Farms sold to China”] Yesterday’s post on shipping hogs to China doesn’t appear logical. Smithfield farms slaughters over a hundred thousand hogs daily. The logistics involved in shipping so many live animals to China isn’t economically supported. There are not an adequate supply of ships with capability to transport hogs over such a long distance. Envision how much feed, water and care would be required for the voyage. The animal waste would need to be processed. There is a large export of sheep and cattle from Australia to the Arabian peninsula. The major difference is that the importers process the sheep and cattle for local consumption and do not export the processed meat to Australia. The sheer volume of hogs dwarfs what is already shipped by sea. The more likely scenario is that the Chinese have bought Smithfield farms to secure a supply of quality pork which will continue to be raised, slaughtered and packaged in the US and then shipped to China. Link
I heard a rumor last night that the defunct Keys band the “Road Whores” may make an appearance at Wetstock 2014. I sure hope this is true. I want some down and dirty music that makes me feel like I just had sex with a cheap hooker, not that auto-tuned overproduced crap they are playing nowadays.
[Free Food] The working homeless like boat or van dwellers, folks who are just a bad week or so away from being homeless, are the people who handle the shitty little jobs that need doing. Daddy Bones BBQ in KW wants to say thanks. Free food and music June 8th, 2pm till whenever food runs out. Food cost are being provided by myself and “Daddy Bones”, one of the all around nicest guys and caring people I have met down here since I returned home in 1999. He ask to remain nameless and thankless so I will respect his wishes. More food means more party, more musicians mean more music. Now we could give a rats ass if anybody wants to contribute or not, but will not turn anyone down. We are smoking all night Saturday and Sunday till the party starts. GFS is next door. Musicians call us, tell us id you want to play before Fri the 6th. Now the mind boggling part–no booze or beer. Imagine a day you can meet your friends and neighbors, hangout, eat, listen to great Keys music without polluting the afternoon with alcohol. who ever heard of such a thing in the Keys!
The waxing Moon now walks eastward under the Sickle of Leo from night to night.
It is amazing how a simple smell can take me back to an earlier time in my life. This happens occasionally and without warning or reason. I am writing this sitting on our porch staring out at the beautiful day beginning to unfold.  The morning air is still and with no hint of a breeze to sway the palm fronds. A boat just passed in front of the dock and moments later I could catch a faint smell of a two-stroke engine. To some that might sound unpleasant but for me this aroma took me on a journey in time.I closed my eyes and suddenly I was a kid again with my dad on our pontoon boat heading across the lake to our campsite where the rest of the family was cooking breakfast on an open fire and the Coleman stove. What wonderful memories! During this brief mental excursion, I realized how water has always been a big part of our lives growing up. My brother and I were always attracted to an aquatic way of life and it’s no wonder that we both somehow migrated to spots by the water. I remember once when we were young walking home from Sunday school in our “Sunday Best” clothes, along the way we stopped by to see our uncle who had a car repair shop. His shop was next to the small river that ran through our town, and as we approached, my brother spotted a roof from a car that had been cut off and was sitting upside down looking like a huge tub. We both concluded this was the closest thing we had to a boat and slid it to the riverbank. Realizing we needed some steering for our vessel, two long poles were gathered and we were ready for our maiden voyage. We gently slid our new yacht into the water and the launch could not have gone better. We were afloat and maneuvered our vessel to the center of the river, catching the current to gently nudge us downstream. All was going exceedingly well until a small ripple of water splashed into our craft. The sides were only an inch or two out of the water and the rounded bottom was difficult to keep level. The more we tried to recover, the more water slowly came in. The Livingston boys gave it their best but in the end, physics prevailed. We didn’t capsize; it was just a slow orderly decent. First the water reached our ankles, then our knees, etc. We ever so slowly reached the reality that it was time to abandon ship swim to the shore and come up with some type of story to tell our mom. We had some explaining to do. Those definitely were the good old days.
[“Gun control has to be all through the land or it won’t work”]  Do you mean like Prohibition?  Or maybe you mean like the gun laws in Mexico?
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sticker2[Free boat Stickers] Safe boating through Boating classes and Recreational Vessel Exams continue to be the USCG Auxiliary’s top priority. This year the Auxiliary started a new campaign to talk to the public about safe boating practices through Kayak, row boats and Canoe exams. These vessels are not required to have any type of identification. With our exam we will be providing free Vessel Identification Stickers. These Stickers can save lives and money. If your small vessel gets away from you and someone else finds it, they will have a contact number to assess if someone is in trouble or if the vessel just drifted away. If the Coast Guard runs across this vessel, they have no choice but to conduct a search and rescue mission until they are confident no one is at risk. These Coast Guard missions can cost from $5.000 to $80,000.  With this sticker, a quick phone call could resolve whether to go or no go on what could be an expensive or lifesaving mission.We invite the public to contact the USCG Auxiliary in your area for a free vessel exam.
[“Gun control only works when a national standard is enforced”] That’s right, just ask Australia, France, England, South Africa, any South American country. Yes, no guns for the people means peace and tranquility? Get real! People dream of things like this, but when their house is broken into the first thing the do is call an armed cop to defend them. You anti-gun nuts are all hypocrites. The bad guys will always have guns, they make them in their machine shops to order! Then there is the Military Industrial Complex!
[Identity Thieves] This is a perfect reason why people who believe and say, “It doesn’t affect or bother me, if the government is keeping tabs on my conversations or Internet use, because I have nothing to hide.” Better wake up because a terrorist is not going to use his personal applications for transmitting his agenda. He’s going to use yours. He’s going to use your name, picture, etc. The government will pick you up and arrest you. Even if you’re innocent. Do you have any idea how this will ruin your freedom, life and most importantly, financially, until you’re proven innocent?
[Taxation] Does the Republican Party think we are stupid? When the fees for auto license and registration were raised they claimed that was not a tax increase. Now that they are lowering them — it is a tax cut (per Holly Merrill on US1 radio ad). What a deal for them! I guess they hope we don’t remember past actions.
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flag close upGod bless America,
Land that I love,
Stand beside her, and guide her
Through the night with a light from above.
From the mountains, to the prairies,
To the oceans, white with foam
God bless America, My home sweet home
What has become of all the pet projects the Monroe County Bunch has been slithering funds for in the last few years? Nothing has been posted on the CT about any projects to keep us tax payers up to par. Out of sight is out of mind, right! We deserve what happens to our islands.
To the poster who knocked FTR about not being a patriot, please get help at the VA fast!
bc-ct2[Captain Doom and Gloom] Would it not be better for people to sell their own property and not rely on the real estate moguls to twist and spin things out of reality?
Sports should all be armature and never allowed to be used to make profit from. People should have real productive jobs then they can play!
The farmer and well driller are the most important people on this planet. Ask the Amish!
War is the necessary evil of the inept non-prosperous and sick part of humanity unneeded by the majority. Sheep can live forever without wolves!
Utopian thinking is considered a curse by those in power because it dreams of realities that can never be accomplished by an over crowded planet!
Old Chinese saying; ‘Anything that moves eat it. If it doesn’t move eat it again!’
I have been to Detroit, South LA, and many other vacation spots that should be erased from our maps and made into very large fresh water lakes!
National politics is back. Click on this link to send your national political post anonymously. No one will know your name or email address, [Well, maybe the NSA will] not even me. FTR is going to be the new national politics editor. Do not fear, FTR promised to post everything, even if he hates it, he’s that kind of guy.
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Obama is so cool and slick.  He let those 5 Gitmo guys go free because there wasn’t much we could do with them while they were there.  Now they are out and about and are fair game for Obama’s drones.  OORAH!
 After reading Sunday’s CT, I am 100% sure there are very few, if any, sane, realistic, logical, true Americans in the Democrat Party!
from the right
By now you certainly have learned that Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl has been released by his Taliban captors. Certainly you also know that release occurred only because we traded prisoners with the fanatics. In exchange for Bergdahl we released, from Gitmo, 5 vicious, murderous, totally dedicated Muslim fundamentalist jihadists. At least two of the freed killers were high ranking military members of their organizations. All had killed or participated in the killing of many Americans.

bowe-robewrt-bergdahlPerhaps you have forgotten how Bergdahl came to be a captive of the Jihadists.   Bergdahl was stationed in Afghanistan. Bergdahl was a very disgruntled soldier. Not long before his capture, he sent an email to his family wherein he railed against the war even going so far as to write that he was ashamed to be an American. The earliest reports of his capture relate that he simply walked away from his secure base at the end of shift, and walked directly into a nearby ghetto where he was captured.

During his captivity he made several videos that were complimentary to his captors.

Obama played true to form, he broke the law in permitting the exchange. Federal law requires that the President notify the Congress 30 days in advance of any such action. Perhaps even worse, he set a precedent that will haunt us. He negotiated with the Taliban for the swap of prisoners. That gives all who hate America carte blanche to kidnap Americans anywhere and to be assured that they will get high value in return. Obama’s disdain for the law and for long standing policy will yield us only further grief. It is true that we have exchanged prisoners in the past. But the exchanges were with responsible governments, not terrorists. Obama’s act will certainly result in more kidnappings, As I recall the previous exchanges were one for one. In this instance Obama freed 5 terribly dangerous killers of Americans for a single sad sack American soldier who wrote that he hates America. Never forget that the 5 murderers Obama releases are sworn to kill Americans. It is their reason to live.


A POSTER WROTE:  “I am beside myself with our President Obama & the deal cut with terrorists. We, American’s don’t do deals with terrorist. This opens up a whole new way the bad guys are going to deal with us. Our lack of leadership around the world is sad and dangerous. The damage our President Obama has done will take years to undo. I can only hope the Independent voters , along with free thinking Democrats will help us get out of the mess President Obama and his socialist policy’s has imposed on this great country. Have a blessed day.”

FTR’S RESPONSE: Amen! Deer Friend, you are right on. I urge you and all who are like minded to get involved. Open up your wallets and make contributions to politicians who share your values. Talk politics with your friends, urge them to get involved. The mid-term elections are critical, absolutely critical. I am absolutely convinced that we are at a tipping point. If the liberals gain strength the America that we now know and love will soon be but a fond memory.


A POSTER WROTE: “”I’m sick of FTR guy telling us what a rotten government this is and how bad we are doing. Maybe he should leave if he hates it so much. Him and his ilk are trying everything they can to bring down this country. Yeah, right, he’s a “patriot’, the kind we’re all afraid of. I hope he doesn’t have a gun.”

ANOTHER POSTER RESPONDED: “ (Now) Let me translate this post into Lib-Speak:     “I’m sick of Conservatives pointing out what a criminal and corrupt government this is, and how it has made us worse. Maybe they should leave if they don’t agree with our liberal politics (crimes). They and their ilk are trying everything they can to point out wrongdoings and bring this country back to greatness. We do not like ‘patriots’, they scare us because they expose us. I hope they don’t have guns, because that makes it harder to bring about our “Hope and CHANGE”.

**As a side note, and please correct me if I am mistaken, but it is my understanding that FTR is a retired Police Officer. Yet the original poster doesn’t think he should be allowed to have a gun?!!!?**

FTR’S RESPONSE: None needed…..Thanks for taking the time to say it all.


Thanks for stopping by. Respectfully submitted: FTR.

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