2015 November

Saturday, November 7, 2015


Since 2002. Published Wednesdays and Saturdays

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[Voyeur] In his weekly radio report on 104.1 Chief Donie Lee actually said that wearing the new body cameras helped his officers keep things in order during Fantasy Fest. ha! I wonder how many hours of entertainment that video provided for the cops after it was over.

[Hospital Try To Confuse Customer’s Bills] Apparently, after 36 years, the ICD-10 (international classification of diseases) list of medical codes has been updated and increased from 14,000 to almost 70,000. There is now a medical code for “struck by a turtle”, “run over by a roller skater”, “pecked by a chicken”, and “sucked into a jet engine” (that’s got to leave a mark!).
seal president of the US


Please, for everyone’s sanity, keep the political crap separate. From my many years of reading the CT political posters, for the most part are unhappy, singled minded, mean spirited, name callers, who just want to feel important and impress themselves. They never change anyone’s mind. (Ed: Don’t worry, it will never happen again.) National Politics

How can we find out which restaurants and markets in the Keys spike their foods with MSG or the equivalent chemicals?


If you stop eating bacon you’re still going to die.

Deer Ed. I hope you are enjoying your twice a week publishing. I am enjoying it more myself without the politics.

Is there any chance you would support a Community Calendar? I checked with the Chamber and they said there really isn’t one. They have an Events calendar, but it’s mostly Chamber related. They said most people use the Weekly papers. I think it would be a great service to put local things on a Community Calendar. If an organization wants to schedule something they can pick an appropriate day. (Ed: We post any event that is sent to us as we always have. A separate page for that takes just too much for me to maintain.)

Only 2 disciplinary actions against National Marine Sanctuary Foundation in 5 years. Link
culvertpipe[The Future of our Canals] Most of us moved to Ramrod Key to enjoy waterfront living. Water is the essence and the strength of our lifestyle and prosperity.  Most of us live along canals originally dredged out in 1959 and 1960.  Although there are variations, the canals presently average 7 feet in depth and the main canal averages 6 feet in depth. The side canals tend to be at their shallowest where they intersect with the main canal, which has a minimum depth of around 4 feet at lower tides. Link
I had my generator started by the Lawnmowerman last month and I went to start it yesterday and it wouldn’t. I brought it back thinking it was under some kind of guarantee only to find they’ve gone out of business. Now what?
ballot box votesResults of the 2015 City Council race in Marathon

Mark Senmartin ~ 23.35% of the vote ~ 888 votes
Michelle Coldiron ~ 20.54% of the vote ~ 781 votes
Dick Ramsay ~ 18.72% of the vote ~ 712 votes
Trish Hintze ~ 14.36% of the vote ~ 546 votes
Nicholas Antonelli ~ 11.46% of the vote ~ 436 votes




This strange looking urinal blew my pee all over the place.



Hold your spiritual bromides. Pat isn’t with God. He’s f**king dead. He wasn’t religious. So thank you for your thoughts, but he’s f**king dead.

pyramid comet



[Pyramid Silos] Republican presidential candidate Ben Carson on Thursday stood by his belief that Egypt’s great pyramids were built by the Biblical figure Joseph to store grain — not as tombs for pharaohs.

[Fishing Closures] This closure has not been lifted.  The commercial segment of people who make their living off the waters are again held back.

The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission (FWC) is sending this notice to remind ML endorsement holders that the prohibition on the commercial harvest of the giant Caribbean sea anemone (Condylactis gigantea) is still in effect.  At the September 2012 Commission meeting, FWC Commissioners approved a rule reducing the commercial and recreation bag limits for Condylactis gigantea to zero and directed staff to implement a monitoring program, work with the industry, and return in three years with options for future management.  The monitoring program began in 2013 and was recently concluded.  FWC staff are currently evaluating the results of the monitoring program and reviewing other available data.  We will begin working with industry in the next few months to develop options for future management of this species.  In the meantime, and until the FWC adopts new regulations allowing for harvest, the recreational and commercial fishery for Condylactis gigantea remains closed.

If you have any questions or concerns, please contact me personally by email at or by phone at (727) 502-4725.



[Gunfight at the KW Corral] Dashboard video released by the Monroe County Sheriff’s Office Thursday of the dramatic Oct. 24 firefight between deputies and an armed robbery suspect shows both sides fired myriad times in a violent exchange of gunfire. Video

Forgotten Felines of the Florida Keys will hold its first quarterly meeting of the season at the Martin Luther Chapel (behind the NAPA store on Overseas Highway in Marathon) on Monday, November 16.  The meeting will start at 6:30 p.m. and the public is invited.  Refreshments will be served.

Forgotten Felines is an all volunteer organization which provides food and veterinary care to homeless and abandoned cats in the Middle and Lower Keys.  They also place adoptable cats in loving homes and strive to educate the public about the importance of proper care and spay/neuter of pets.  In the nearly two decades of its existence, Forgotten Felines has spayed/neutered more than 3,000 cats.  They also maintain a number of daily feeding stations which service several hundred homeless cats.

If you are unable to attend, but are interested in becoming a Forgotten Felines volunteer should call (305) 743-2520.



A snowball maker? Are today’s kid’s so lame that they forgot how to make a snowball? It’s like they can’t make ice cubes because they lost the link.

When an old lady dies and then her husband dies a couple of weeks later, it isn’t because his heart is broken. It’s because he can’t cook.
[Word For The Day] Pokeysaurus n: that elderly driver doing 25 in a 55 mph zone. Don’t curse at them, you don’t want them driving faster than they are capable. Besides, that’s your future evolution if you survive long enough.
faustos-breakfast-sausageFausto’s in K.W. now has homemade breakfast sausage, mild and hot. It’s really good. They are the only place in the Keys to get homemade sausage.
[Coercion, Duress, Extortion] If one or all of these describe why you signed or are may be signing an easement to FKAA for the installation of a County grinder pump station in your yard, please send your story and any correspondence or other substantiating evidence to with subject line “Forced easement”. Conversation details with names and approximate dates may also help hang the perps. Thank you!


[For Sale] Bait and beer refrigerators. Both are very clean inside. Both work perfectly. They are not self-defrosting.  18 ½ D X 19 W X 33 ½ H and 18 D X 18 5/8 W x 49 ½ H. Pick up on Big Pine. $75 for both.

Claustrophobia is the fear of closed spaces. For example: I am going to the liquor store and I’m scared that it’s closed.


[Orchids] On Nov. 15, 1 pm, at W. Martello Gardens, Higgs Beach, KW, Dr. Martin Motes will speak on growing Vandas in our climate and environment; he is a world famous grower, lecturer, professor and author of several books along with his wife Mary, also an author. Dr. Motes writes a monthly piece available online that is a wealth of information to any orchid lover. Plants for sale, raffles, books and more will be offered. As always, the public is welcome. Marie 305 509 7744,   Link

Oh, how I love the VA!
I may be derelict, homeless,  long hair and beard,
But they take care of me like
I’m not even wierd.
Oh how I love the VA!
The guys I meet there are
all my bros.
And God knows we’ve all
been through the throes.
But, oh, how I love the VA!
If I’d known back then, how
good they’d treat me now,
maybe back then, I Wouldn’t
have caused such a row.
But, oh, how I love the VA!
My Dad died here and
I probably will too,
But I thank God Almighty
that for a little while, anyway,
I got to spend some time with



Best Halloween costume ever!

[High Cost of Poop] We just go an estimate for $2500 to do the sewer connect! Does anyone know who could do it at a more reasonable price? We are approx. 50 feet from the connection. I could dig the trench and lay the PVC, but I do not have a plumber’s license to pull the permit. Any suggestions would be appreciated.
[Death in the Deep] Ten years ago Don Shirley and his friend Dave Shaw were diving in Bushman’s Hole, South Africa, one of the world’s deepest submerged freshwater caves, when they made an unexpected discovery – the body of … Audio


[Coconuts] For the last 33 years at the light down town Big Pine Key. Always open & family owned. With out you, there is no us. Thank you!

[Ukulele Album] Joe Brown – Mr Blue Sky  (Come to Coconuts’ Uke Nite every Wednesday) Video


[Police Shootout] Welcome to Paradise! The land of sun and fun and firepower! BYOB (Bring Your Own Bullets). He doesn’t look like a killer?  “Look at me, Ma, I’m on top of the world.” Link

Phone companies and ISPs who offer a block sender tool and charge you extra per month for the service can pepper their computer generated call sheet to call you so they can make money deleting the calls. At $X per phone or email that can add up to billions per year. Nothing is sacred anymore. What a racket!



Bluebird American guitar.



Chinese neighbors’ first Halloween.



Tony Feil’s 1939 Pontiac



This guy must have nothing to do.




Epic hair

I found a computer program that will take any spam email and send it back to the sender, the senders ISP, and the FCC, with one click. I hope it works and I hope the SOBs hate this tool. The other best way to not get junk email is to set your email program to only accept those senders in your address book and automatically delete all incoming junk. That works in all email programs, but you’ll miss a lot genuine mail you might want.
Hillary-Crumbling[FTR] Quinnipiac has just released a new presidential preference poll. It’s only a year until the general election, and the primaries are just around the corner.

Quinnipiac tells us that if the general election were held today, Carson would beat Hillary by 10 points.

Certainly that trouncing is influenced by how people perceive the character of the candidates. 60 percent of voters say Carson is honest. That’s more than twice as many as say he isn’t. Carson’s current net honesty score is positive 34 (60 percent honest vs. 26 percent not). Hillary, well….not so hot. Overall, only 35 percent of voters think Clinton is honest and trustworthy. That’s down from 45 percent in June and a new low. And a record 61 percent say she is not honest, up from 52 percent (June 2015). Hillary Clinton’s ratings are record setting — in a bad way. Her net honesty score is negative 26.

Character counts.  NATIONAL POLITICS

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