2018 August

Tuesday, August 7, 2018

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsLetters to the editor with pictures since 0202. Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage days, Tuesdays and Fridays.​​​

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[Algae Bloom] Wouldn’t it make more sense to treat the water in Lake Okeechobee before releasing it into the Gulf?  I realize

there’s a lot of water to treat, but wouldn’t that be less of an effort than it is to clean up after the destruction it

causes by not doing so?  It’s like closing the barn door after the horse got out. I know it’s convenient to blame the farmers and residents in south Florida for using fertilizer, but isn’t that just the government passing the buck?  After all, isn’t it the Army Corps of Engineers who control the release of the water?  Seems to me, every time they get involved with anything, it ends in disaster.

Confucius say, “Man who takes wild guess without knowing the true meaning only displays his stupidity.”

Another thought about professional athletes. You began getting attention because of your athletic ability, period. As your athletic ability’s became more recognized your ego became a bit more inflated until you felt that your personal opinions were more important than your athletic abilities. In the fans’ minds nothing matters but your athletic abilities. We don’t give a shit about your opinions. You’re nothing but a gladiator paid to perform. Nothing else; and when you stumble or piss—off the fans it’s thumbs down, off to the lions.

I’m wanting to scuba dive one last time and stay in Key West during this next full moon. What are the better restaurants besides Square Grouper & Half Shell Raw Bar and Louie’s Backyard.


Have any of you seen a red-headed woodpecker or hummingbird since Irma? Are woodpeckers seasonal or here all year?  I never noticed, it seemed they were here all year. I took so many things for granted about our nature that I’m learning again. That’s good.

[Lobster Season] Tomorrow, August 8 is lobster season. Because of the trade war, China will no longer be buying the 90% of our lobster that they have in the past sending local prices down in the toilet. I hope the fisherman can find another market or we’re going to see first hand the effects of a trade war. Commercial fishing is an expensive job.


[Beach Gatherings] Since Little Palm Island closed, locals have been using their beach instead of Picnic Island that was devastated.

[Canadian Pot] Canada recently passed legislation legalizing the use of marijuana, effective October 17, 2018.  Showing that we still have some common sense, it is still illegal to operate a motor vehicle while impaired by drugs or alcohol, but there is no equivalent to the breath analyzer test for pot impairment.


I have a question for Ms Halama . If she should be elected to represent us will she go against big business in the Keys and work to eliminate mini lobster season or will she bow to the money folks as every other Commissioner has?

Is the red tide going to the Keys? Link




‘Straw criminal‘ is soon to be a new crime.

[Chainsaw Fails] Just because you own a chainsaw doesn’t make you a logger–or smart! This is why you never stand around to watch a tree come down except from a very safe distance. Video
[Hypocrite] I read an article on Jimmy Buffet the other day. That sellout is busy putting his name and Margaritaville on bars, hotels and over-55 communities. Who do you thing buys into his current offerings? Wannabe paradise people! That’s who. The article even mentioned how Buffet fled the Keys when it became “too commercialized”. Well thank you old pot smuggler! You sung about it, you told them about it and now look at it. As if killing the Keys wasn’t enough, your silly million-dollar brand is ruining the rest of the state. Anyone here remember where Jimmy Buffet’s Lower Keys recording studio was? Anyone remember Bobalu’s when Bob and Lucy owned it, and Buffet used to hang out there?
Nah, I didn’t think so. Ban mini-season, keep selling margaritas and music!’I said I know that this may sound funny
But money don’t mean nothin’ to me
I won’t make my music for money, no
I’m gonna make my music for me’Jimmy Buffett — Makin’ Music for Money
[Environment vs Money] Please stop being so naïve thinking that people will care more about the environment than making money.  Mini lobster season will continue because the vacation rental home owners can make a killing (excuse the pun).  A March 2013 U. S. Gallup poll asked the question “With which of these statements about the environment and the economy do you most agree:   protection of the environment should be given priority, even at the risk of curbing economic growth or economic growth should be given priority even if the environment suffers to some extent? By a 48 to 43 percent margin, more Americans opted for economic growth. By varying margins, Americans have made the same choice since they began to feel the effects of the Great Recession in late 2008.
Mini-season was invented as a way of letting recreational divers get a chance at collecting lobsters before the commercial season started. Over the years it has grown to the abomination it has become with everyone who thought they were a diver coming down to suck on old regulators connected to hookah rigs that run two to three days per year. Mini-season should have been outlawed years ago once tourism and the TDC took over and killed the Keys.


The Perseid Meteor Shower is coming next weekend. Here’s info from the The American Meteor Society on how to view it. Link

[FTR on Guns, Pussy, Abortion] On Friday a poster suggested that guns were a skurge, whatever in the hell a skurge is, and that they should be banned.  The reality is that guns used in self-defense or the defense of others saves lives, likely more often than not.  No gun ever, ever, has been charged with homicide.  No gun, ever, has been charged with aggravated battery.  Hands and feet are the instruments used more frequently each year than are rifles in the taking of human life.  That includes the “dreaded” AR15 and the AK47.   BTW the AR’s (.223) are very near the bottom of the ladder of lethality in the ranking of centerfire cartridges.  A killer, when ready to kill, will use whatever instrument he/she has available, be it a knife, fire, a fork, a car a fist, a hammer, or a brick.

Here in Florida, concealed carry has helped slash our murder rate. In the fifteen years following the passage of Florida’s concealed carry law in 1987, over 800,000 permits to carry firearms were issued to people in the state.  FBI reports show that the homicide rate in Florida, which in 1987 was much higher than the national average, fell 52% during that 15-year period — thus putting the Florida rate below the national average.

In re old men sniffing a pissed posters pussy.  Deer genteel lady.  You sure are a class act!  Kind of makes one wonder how many old men sniffing your pussy it has taken to make you tired of having your pussy sniffed?   Have you asked yourself why so many old men sniff when your pussy is present?  Perhaps it’s because you have a particularly pungent pussy.  I’m certainly no expert on the issue, but as I understand it there are any number of feminine hygiene products available over the counter.  Perhaps that would give you some relief.  Some much needed rest.

As to abortion: You put the onus (look it up) of sterilization on the male, just curious; why don’t you get sterilized?  It sure would help tidy up the gene pool.  Best regards.  ~FTR

[Environment vs Money] Finding a job, paying your mortgage, providing adequate meals for your family, all seem more important, certainly more pressing, than environmental debates about global warming, fracking, and plastic straws in the ocean.  Money will motivate to continue allowing mini lobster season versus keeping lobsters in the water for those Wednesdays and Thursdays once a year
[Lobster Season] Aug 6th – March 15th is Crawfish (Florida Lobster) Season. Coconuts salutes our commercial fishermen! Unless you have done it, there is no way I can share with you how hard it is. All commercial fishing is some of the most difficult work a person can do. It’s long, hard & dangerous. Speaking for myself, I have commercial fished for crawfish, mackerel & king fish. It’s a young man’s job for sure. I love the sea and enjoyed my time commercial fishing. I love the fish house, the boats and most of all the fishermen. A special breed, indeed. My hope is that this season will open with lobster selling at a fair price. In the past China has been buying much of the catch. I understand that will slow down this year. My prayer for you guys is for a good price, no storms, and a safe season. Blessings. Cultivators of the sea are the most valuable citizens. They are the most vigorous, the most independent, the most virtuous, and they are tied to their Country and wedded to its liberty and interests by the most lasting bonds. God bless our commercial fishermen.

“Hard labor left his hands callused, the sun bleached his hair, his face leathered, and his heart beats with the rhythm of the sea.”  ~Coconuts Bar & Liquor Store

[Media Nutrition Lies] Dr. Axe has compiled a list of the top media nutrition lies. Americans typically carry about 30 pounds more fat than they did in 1960, and he blames the really bad “healthy nutrition” advice promoted by the mainstream media and government agencies. If you want to shed some excess pounds, skip the calorie counting and general avoidance of fat. Dr. Axe gives the advice you need to enjoy eating while dropping the excess weight. Link
[Florida Lobster Roll] I’m intrigued by the poster who mentioned the Florida version of the lobster roll. Care to share the recipe?
[Grants — Post-Irma Assistance] To date, over $1.1 million has been provided for Hurricane Irma relief and recovery efforts greatly benefiting thousands of residents from Key West to Key Largo. Funds are being distributed through the Florida Keys Emergency Relief Fund and the Landau Family Hurricane Relief Fund for the Upper Keys to help residents get their lives and homes back in order by working with local nonprofits and faith-based partners. Link
[Affordable Mass Transit] I’m thinking of starting a “Go Fund Me” project to bring affordable mass transit to the Keys. Here’s a short video of what I want to do. Let me know if you think it’s feasible. Video
[Relocation Assistance To Tenants Displaced From Their Homes] To Folks who might be displaced by this redevelopment, use this link. It might help you. Link
[Fluoride] A recent study funded by agencies that historically have defended the addition of fluoride to drinking water has determined with high confidence that ingestion of fluoride by expectant mothers in quantities typical of communities that fluoridate has shown a 5 to 6 point IQ drop in the offspring tested at ages 4 and 6-12. In other words, there is permanent brain damage to the fetus if the mother is drinking fluoridated water.

FKAA fluoridates the Keys tap water. This is presumably because FKAA senior management is born and raised in Key West of mothers drinking fluoridated water and hence are not too bright (about 5 to 6 IQ points lower). You could say that the dullest knife in the drawer is making decisions detrimental to the rest of the silverware.

[Mold Inside the Walls] Is there a company or County department that can check my house for mold? I smell wet cardboard or wet sheetrock and am worried my family is in danger.

What sprays will kill mold in crawl spaces?




Is this a black hawk? He’s been flying over the center part of BPK for a month. Mrs hawk is flying around too, answering his whistle/scream. The underside of his wings have a broad white or grey band in the middle of the wing from top to bottom. I’ve never seen this bird here before. Is this something new?

My wife is totally pissed at product manufacturers because they not only raise prices endlessly but reduce the size of their products for more profit. She now shops for only what is worth buying and will not buy rip off items.




[Old Rockers] Am I allowed to go to Wetstock 14 if I have to wear Depends?

[Immigration] Try the open door challenge. Here is how it works. If you believe we should have open borders simply remove your front door. Also, include a sign welcoming ‘anyone and everyone’ to come in and take anything they want. come on, do it for the children.


[Be A Firefighter] Monroe County wants to train anyone interested to become a firefighter and first responder. Tuition is waived for County residents. There will be an informational meeting Thursday, August 9th at the Joe London Training Academy on Crawl Key. Details are on the County website. Link

[No More Bees] “US wildlife refuges end ban on neonics and GM crops” People are saying that we are killing the earth. No, the earth will continue on as it has always done. What we are doing is killing ourselves in what amounts to a mass suicide. I for one, do not wish to be part of this. Link
[Vote For Beth] Big Pine Key through Key West residents your ballot will say “Key West Utility Board”, but please don’t be confused, this is your “Keys Energy Board”, and for the first time ever you get to vote for the entire board! Early voting opens next week, on Monday, August 13th.  Primary election day is August 28th.

With more than 10 years of involvement and experience (and having attended nearly 300 meetings) towards advancing our local electric, utility, and conservation policies, I am the honored and humbled to be Endorsed by the Key West Firefighters Local 1424 for the Key West Utility Board Seat D.

Endorsed by the KW Firefighters, but the most important endorsement is yours!  ~Beth
Endorsement – Ramsay-Vickrey (1) KEY WESY FIREFIGHTERS LOCAL 1424



Here’s a photograph of Delta Burke, when she was only 17 years old and was crowned Miss Florida back in 1974. Delta Ramona Leah Burke went on to become an actress, producer, and author. From 1986 to 1991, she starred as Suzanne Sugarbaker in the sitcom Designing Women. For this role, she was nominated for two Emmy Awards for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series. A few of Burke’s other television acting credits include Filthy Rich 1982–1983, Delta 1992–1993, Women of the House, 1995 and DAG, 2000–2001. She also had a recurring guest role in the drama series Boston Legal 2006–2007.

In the history of firearms has a gun ever killed a person without being fired either on purpose or even accidentally?  Ever since Cane slew Able with a rock we had thousands (if you are biblical) and millions of years of killing each other (if you follow the evolution camp).  Either way, with nothing more than our fists progressing to stones, blunt sticks, sharp sticks, slings, arrows, swords, knives, ad nauseum.

To disarm the weak and to prevent them from protecting themselves from the strong, is where true evil comes in.  If you are not evil, then you are either stupid or naive. If you make laws to outlaw firearms, in what reality will an ‘out law’ follow the law?



[Sunscreen] Nearly 4 years ago my friend developed an allergy to oxybenzone.   It was horrible, and it took months to figure it all out.  Oxybenzone is the number 1 allergen in sun screen and enters your body via the skin and acts like Estrogen. It even shows up in your urine, so I can see why it is killing coral reefs; it’s a powerful drug.

[“Paper straw factory to open in Britain”] That’s great. They don’t have any trees left as it is, so what to do strip the rain forest for paper pulp? Who’s kidding whom with this straw BS?

Down with mini season!

[Men Teaching Classes for Women] Subjects include Adjust a Thermostat, Putting the Toilet Seat Down, etc. Link
A chainsaw doesn’t make you a logger. Video
[“Purple Heart blood”] My buddy was in the Army during the Vietnam era and got a purple heart for a paper cut in Ft Poke, LA! He was a pay clerk and never saw Vietnam!


Modern-day Iran couldn’t be any more different from the United States, but as images from 1960s Iran suggest, there was once a time when the streets of Tehran mirrored those of Los Angeles California or Miami, Florida. So just what exactly changed?

The Iranian Revolution of 1979 marks the changes not only within the country but with its relationship with the United States. The revolution of 1979 refers to the overthrow of the Pahlavi dynasty under Mohammad Reza Shah Pahlavi. The dramatic differences in their culture came from Jalal Al-e-Ahmad’s idea of Gharbzadegi – which states Western culture is a plague to be eliminated.

[Every Day Straws and More Straws] 500,000,000 plastic straws every day are used in the USA alone, resulting in 275 tons of trash daily. If you don’t think that is significant you’re not paying attention and you should be ashamed.




[Toys For Refugee Tots] Pictures of life in a refugee camp. Link

[“Bubbas elected”] Ha, ha, ha, this was the funniest post I have read in a long time. Hey fool, who do you think owns the voting machines? Follow the money and watch the tourists feed the sharks


[Parts from 1999 F-350] Doors, transmission transfer case, front differential, rear differential. Everything goes but tires and rims. Located at MM 48 (20th Street Ocean in Marathon. Make offers.

[Sunscreen and Cancer] One of the world’s leading authorities on natural cancer cures, Dr. Leonard Coldwell, asserts that the chemicals in sunscreen cause most skin cancers and not the sun. Andreas Moritz, a leading practitioner in the field of alternative and integrative medicine, goes so far as to state, “Sunscreen is the leading cause of skin cancer.”

Zinc oxide is safe in the sun and is the EWG’s first choice for sun protection. It provides greater protection from UVA rays than any other sunscreen chemical approved in the United States. Natural ingredients such as coconut oil and shea butter are safe in sunscreen and can help nourish and protect the skin.

Wearing a hat and extra clothing is better to protect skin from burning instead of using sunscreen. Link

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