2019 June

Tuesday, June 25, 2019

Letters to the editor with pictures since 2002. Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage days, Tuesdays and Fridays.



[“Feeding corn to deer”] Corn is empty calories for deer and lacks nutrition. It’s the same as feeding sugar to humans and not at all good for them. It is well known that a sudden change in diet to cracked corn (or if they consume too much of it in even one feeding) can result in a deer experiencing a very distressful death. I have seen it with my own eyes and it’s absolutely horrible. Don’t feed deer corn or any other simple carbs such as bread, chips, or pasta.

[No Shame] I was reading the Citizen the other day and was shocked to see that Randy Acevedo is the president of the Key West Rotary and his wife, Amber, the current principal of Key West High School, is the incoming president.  Acevedo is a convicted felon who was found guilty of being complicit (with his first wife) in the theft of nearly a half million dollars from the school district while he was superintendent.  He was removed from office by the Governor.

Rotary Clubs International touts itself as having the “support of education” as one of its guiding principles.  I can’t imagine they know the background of the local chapter’s president.  If they do, then shame on them. If past behavior is any indicator, hopefully, the Key West Rotary is keeping a close eye on their treasury.

[Knight’s Key Resort] We have lived in the Keys for the past 3 years and are always interested in the rare, upper-rate restaurants in the middle and lower Keys. Having watched the “Isla Bella Beach Resort” major development grow and open this year in Knight Key, Marathon, we decided to give their restaurant, “Il Postino” a try–only to be reminded on their web site that if you are not an actual guest of the resort, you need to make a reservation. OK, so we tried to make one for tomorrow, but have been getting their voicemail on the number stated on the restaurant page for the past 3 hours (it is now 8:30pm). So it seems you just cannot eat in their place, no matter how hard you try to spend your money. (Their dinner entrees are in the $32+ range). Based on previous reviews posted on TripAdvisor, it looks like the kitchen can’t handle more than 2 tables’ worth at a time (although with supposedly excellent food). People get there, the place is almost empty, and they get turned away. Bad experience and we have only tried to follow their reservations instructions. We will not try again. Menu



If there are no ups and down in your life it means that you are dead.

[Empty Police Cars] I never thought I would ever say this, but I finally found 2 cops I like. There’s one coming into town, and one as you leave town. I just can’t decide which one is better. They are so much alike. Now if we could just get rid of the other ones the Keys would be such a better place.



Summer Table” by Jane Gilbert, acrylic on linen.

When are they going to make a device screen that you can see in sunlight? That should include backup cameras in new vehicles. What good are they if you can’t see them for the glare? Where’s Steve Wozniak when we need him?
How scientists are using Burmese pythons as breeding spies in the Everglades. Video
[High Fructose Corn Syrup] You have probably heard that high fructose corn syrup is not good for you. You may have heard commercials basically saying. “No, it’s fine- no worse than sugar.” To confuse consumers that read the ingredients, manufacturers are calling HFCS by other names.
Well, the following link will tell you more than you wanted to know about HFCS and why you should absolutely avoid it. Besides typically being made with GMO corn, the enzymes used to create the high fructose are also GMO. It often contains high mercury levels. It can cause little holes in your intestines that let food, bacteria and more into your bloodstream. It will suddenly overwhelm your liver’s ability to process (you thought booze was tough on it? Read about HFCS!). It is linked to high blood pressure, high cholesterol, abdominal fat, fatty liver disease, diabetes, cancer (especially pancreatic cancer) and more. Scroll past the huge images in the link to get the full story, see the alternative sweeteners and what the differences are. Link
[Wisdom] You shouldn’t always say what you feel.

Maryland is named after Charles I’s Catholic wife, Maria, who incidentally got him beheaded because England was Protestant and they feared Popery and worshiping false gods (saints).

[Movies] The junkie enters the junkie apartment after having been badly beaten, and his junkie girlfriend says, “Your face looks like a pizza.”


[Governor DeSantis Signs Largest Environmental Budget in Florida’s History] He is the first politician that actually recognizes the importance of the environment in Florida. Everyone else only passes lip service to the environment. DeSantis actually does big things for all of us. Link

Why do they call a transgender person a he or a she when they should be an it! Didn’t this happen in old Rome before the crash?
[“Feeding deer”] In retort to the Friday’s post on the Coconut Telegraph about “Feeding Deer” that claims contrary to the “deer folks”, deer do fine eating cracked corn given to them by his/her friends and “What else have the deer people told us that is wrong?”

The deer folks are not wrong. As many internet sites explain, the problem is not the corn, the problem is sudden, excessive intake of simple carbohydrates from the likes of cracked corn, but the effect can also happen from doughnuts or corn chips. What happens next is a condition known as “rumen acidosis” where good bacteria are replaced by bad bacteria in the deer’s stomach system. I have personally witnessed 2 Key Deer dying from rumen acidosis, in their case due to their accidentally getting into a BPK resident’s bag of cracked corn meant for chicken feed. Once symptoms are obvious there’s nothing much one can do, and for deer or man, it’s not a good way to clock out. Key Deer, due to their small size and very specialized diet, are especially vulnerable.
But for the skeptics, why not take a bit more time to self-educate before accusing “the deer folks”? Deer hunters (that are the largest users of corn for deer bait) have tonnes of info and discussions on the subject. Here’s a good place to start. Link

[Stoves] My favorite appliance is the electric stove. You never run out of gas. I’ve had gas stoves all my life until a couple of years ago when the salesman told me newer electric stoves were vastly improved over their ancestors. While gassing it, I ran out of fuel twice over the years. Both times were on Holidays and the turkey didn’t cook. Note: don’t try to cook a turkey in a microwave.

[Selfies] It’s absurd that vacationing people’s main pastime is taking pictures of themselves and everything they eat.


[Baking Soda In The Garden] Top uses of baking soda hacks in gardening and plants. At the end is how to test pH of your garden soil. Video

The phrase “calm down” has a 100% failure rate.
[Travel] Yes, Google Earth is the place to go before you actually do go. So often you look at a beautiful place or cottage only to find that when you get there, it is a mile from the beach or there is a factory right next door or a pig farm. The worst place I ever stayed was also the most beautiful. The problem was that next door there was an open-air karaoke bar that stayed open around the clock. Pillows over my head didn’t help a bit. I had to move and lose the money I had paid in advance.
Gas can safety spouts are dangerous. Bring back the old kind where you just removed the plug at the end of the nozzle and filled the tank. These new ones are ridiculous to use. I just take them off and pour the gas without them. I found it to be less dangerous than spilling gas when trying to use the new spouts that are always spring closed as you have to push the edge thingy up against the tank. I hate them.


After years of practicing I’ve found there’s a lot of things you can’t do while you’re drunk.

[Feeding corn to deer] To the person who thinks feeding cracked corn it good for the deer, I am pretty sure I know who you are talking about. I am going to notify authorities. They are breaking the law and cracked corn has killed Key Deer.



[“Deluxe shipping container homes”] This is a picture of affordable housing developments being planned for Key West.

[“Governor DeSantis Signs Largest Environmental Budget in Florida’s History”] That’s very good, however, it’s all about the Benjamins, baby!  There is finally more money to be made by preserving the Everglades, unlike in the past.
[Naysayers] I suspect those same people who are against fluoride in the water are also the people who are against vaccines.



[Denying History] High School mulls spending $600,000 to remove George Washington murals because they ‘traumatize’ students. Link

[Congress] Dear Boss,
I have enjoyed working here these past several years. You have paid me very well and given me benefits beyond belief. Working only three days per week, having 3-4 months off per year, and a pension plan that will pay my salary till the day I die and then pay my estate one year salary death bonus and then continue to pay my spouse my salary with increases until she or he dies, and a health plan that most people can only dream of having. Despite this, I plan to take the next 12-18 months to find a new position. During this time, I will show up for work when it is convenient for me. In addition, I fully expect to draw my full salary and all the other perks associated with my current job. If my search for this new job proves fruitless, I will be coming back with no loss in pay or status. Before you say anything, remember that you have no choice in this matter. I can, and I will do this.
Every Senator or Congressperson running for President in 2020




[Sunny Days] This chart shows how many hours of blistering sunlight we must endure.

[Travel] Somebody suggested using Google Earth to tour foreign countries before paying a fortune to travel there. I am so glad I did this because most places I wanted to go to are really bad or in trouble. Wars, hate, dirty cities, bad foods, over priced, and lots of diseases. Thanks to whomever posted that idea
[“Round house on Cudjoe Key”] Are you talking about the house that was built next to the retired military General that looks like two breasts from the air?


[Privacy] Imagine you are shopping in your favorite grocery store. As you approach the dairy aisle, you are sent a push notification in your phone: “10 percent off your favorite yogurt! Click here to redeem your coupon.” You considered buying yogurt on your last trip to the store, but you decided against it. How did your phone know? Link

[Modular Homes] Those factory-built junk boxes degrade our property values and bring in nothing but low renters. One of the builders is Pritham Singh, a pariah who developed Truman Annex, Hawk’s Cay and the abortion on Knight’s Key. There’s a couple of independent builders importing pre-fab homes and putting them up, that said, those newer prefabs that went thru Hurricane Irma withstood the storm better than a lot of older homes. Define “low renters”. Rent in the Keys is some of the highest in the state. You must be one of the jaded newbies who overpaid for your island home thinking you would be able to financially exclude those you don’t like. Enjoy your imported dolphin, hogfish, conch and $8 pints.
[Exploding Lighters] Lighters don’t explode because butane is flammable, not explosive with air, it is flammable. It is a fuel yes, but it needs an oxidizer (the oxygen in air) to become flammable. In a lighter it is under pressure; no oxidizer, no fire, and no possible explosion, as it mixes with air when you push the button and release it and spark it, it burns because it is now mixing with an oxidizer -that is all it can do. Burn. No explosions. Now light that spliff and stop wondering about it.
[Candid Camera] Just jump in at minute 25 on RadioLab and listen until minute 33 and enjoy this 8 minute excerpt. A story about Candid Cameras Alan Funt and the Funt family on a vacation. Audio

[Giant Squid in the Gulf of Mexico]  Researchers in the Gulf of Mexico filmed a giant squid in the deep sea as part of an expedition to document elusive marine animals. The video, which lasts less than 30 seconds and was taken about 100 miles southeast of New Orleans, shows what appears at first to be a single tentacle appear from the darkness. Video

[Conundrum] You need to be 21 years old to sell recreational weed and there’s no age restrictions for medical marijuana. You can serve (dangerous) alcohol at 18 and you can go to (dangerous) war at 18, but not smoke (relatively harmless) pot.
[Iguanas] Keep your cat away from the iguana. Video




[“England first settled by Germanic and Viking peoples”] Boy, are you off base. Ever hear of the Picts? Link

[Roosters] This place in France sounds a little like Key West. The locals love their roosters, but the visitors don’t. Link


[Election Hacking in Ten Minutes] An 11-year-old boy on Friday was able to hack into a replica of the Florida state election website and change voting results found there in under 10 minutes during the world’s largest yearly hacking convention, DEFCON 26, organizers of the event said. Thousands of adult hackers attend the convention annually, while this year a group of children attempted to hack 13 imitation websites linked to voting in presidential battleground states. Link

In every argument, one person is always the idiot.