2021 March

Tuesday, March 16, 2021

Published Tuesdays & Fridays Since 2002
(garbage days on Big Pine Key)

The Un-social Media with 60,000 Followers


You don’t have to be a mathematician to know that today is 3.14, AKA PI Day. I have to shuffle through my recipes for a PI to make for tonight’s celebratory dinner. PIneapple PIzza? I think we’ll go with the PIzza.

[Beware the Ides of March] The Ides of March is the 74th day in the Roman calendar, corresponding to 15 March. It was marked by several religious observances and was notable for the Romans as a deadline for settling debts. In 44 BC, it became notorious as the date of the assassination of Julius Caesar which made the Ides of March a turning point in Roman history.

[Spring Forward] I don’t mind the spring ahead 1 hour, but I am still very apprehensive about the Y2K event!

The center of the Pacific Ocean. What planet is this? It’s Earth, viewed from 15°-145°. (Ed: I apologize because the photo you sent vanished.)


[The Nostalgia Machine] Choose a year, then choose a song from an unlimited supply. Most songs include video of the performer.  Very cool! Link

[Doing Your Job] On Monday, March 15, I walked up to a City of KW parking department pickup truck. I informed the gentleman (name withheld) of a parked vehicle on Howe St that had not moved in over a year. He asked me for tag number, description, color, location, etc. He then tells me it’s not his job. Really!

[Ask JP Concrete] I’m mounting a vice floor stand. If I fill the drilled holes in my concrete floor with oil, will it seep into the cured concrete and prevent the bolts I insert into those holes from rusting? I can’t find the stainless steep fasteners I want.

[Covid] I’m not on social media but I assume the conspiracy nuts are pretending that there are thousands of deaths from the vaccine and people are growing third arms and legs. If it’s good, the conspiracy nuts are against it.


Marvelous Marvin Haggler is dead at 66. I still think Haggler beat Sugar Ray Leonard in one of the best fights ever. Video

From the 60’s. Walking In The Sunshine–Roger Miller Have a fun day! Video


[FBI’s Most Wanted] Looking through these listings most all are in the Keys! Link

[Cudjoe Gardens] What happened to the fenced in area in front of Cudjoe Gardens? It looks like a backed up sewer. Where did all the rotting mulch and junk come from? If I lived in one of those million dollar homes in the Gardens, I would sue somebody.
[Vaccine Like eBay Auction] I keep getting emails telling me to schedule an appointment to get jabbed, but all the appointments are filled. What gives? They’ve got me checking my emails every hour looking for the nest email.
[Clueless Operators] Another day out diving in the water worrying about nutball jet skiers. Even getting a go pro picture of the careless operators will not stand up in court. Since you have to be an active duty law enforcement officer, not retired such as I am. How about Jet Ski manufactures having to install some type of sounding device on these stealth rockets?
[“Do people who die from Covid get reincarnated”] It seems only fair seeing how there are no fines for people who kill others by not wearing a mask


Life is a terminal disease, and it’s sexually transmitted.

[Conspiracy] Have any of the conspiracy people noticed that none of their conspiracies ever come true?


[Spam] It’s frustrating to know that every time I buy something online from a new vendor I will be getting junk mail from them everyday for the rest of my life. Sometimes twice a day!

You think officials actually want affordable/workforce housing?  That’s laughable. Most trailer parks, where working people lived,  have been closed down or forced out by development and government regulations. There are hundreds of people on live-aboard boats holding down one, two, or even three jobs trying to get ahead. Now a Key West hotelier wants them gone. Link  
[“Milago Restaurant had class”] If you came to BPK looking for class you drove about 20 miles too far west on US 1. If you’re interested in finding class on BPK I’d suggest that you show up at Coconuts Barn a payday Friday or perhaps the Moose during a holiday weekend. The last classy place I remember about 30 years ago was the “Island Restaurant” in the old train station before hurricane Georges blew it away. Best damn food to be had anywhere.
[Spinning] While I was walking west down my street yesterday at the speed of 3.1 mph, I realized that the earth rotates from west to east at 1000 mph. Then it dawned on me that the earth revolves around the sun at 67,000 mph. Once it clicked-in that our solar system moves through space at 515,000 mph and knowing that the universe is expanding (in whatever direction) at 151664.3 mph I determined in total, I was moving at 734667.4 mph in five different directions at the same time. I was getting dizzy so I decided to sit down at a bus stop and knock off 3.1 mph.
Ashley Marie Tweed of Big Pine Key arrested after attacking a neighbor.  The neighbor said he saw a blonde woman lying in the street. He went to check on her when she slapped the drink out of his hand and began hitting him. Tweed ran away and then hid underneath a truck. Then she threw rocks at Deputy Buscemi. Link

[Peeing] Congratulations to the man who passed a whole night without having to get up to pee.


[Daylite Time] It happens the day after we lose an hour’s sleep with the time change. So if you’re in a state that still changes, you are entitled to an hour’s nap. If your state doesn’t change, sorry, you have to stay awake.

Attack of the GMO Mosquitoes” are just another culling media thought up by the NWO
[Transgender Athletes] I’ve got a solution for all those disturbed individuals who can’t figure out what sex they want to be. They want to compete in athletic events with normal athletes. I mean why expect the world to dance to their tune. I’ve got no problem with their inability to decide if they’re a  man or a woman, but don’t force me to join your team. What’s wrong with competing with other transgenders? Pitting a transgender “woman” with bulging muscles against a natural woman is unfair. It has nothing to do with what sex they “think” they are. Fair is fair
[Voting] Every American citizen should be automatically registered to vote. What’s the big deal? Video


[Karma] Do the people that dies because of the Covid transmitted virus get reincarnated? It seems only fair if there are no fines for people who kill others by not wearing a mask.

[Almost Dead] What I’ve learned about near death experiences changed me. Link

[Affordable Housing] Another beautiful affordable housing development being planned for the lower Keys. It is almost as beautiful as the shipping container development on Marathon. Prices start at  $499,999. And bonus points: it has a flood proof guarantee for 5 years.

[Culling the Population] I was told I have to get the COVID shot or Big Brother will come and crucify me and my wife. I don’t understand why we have to get that shot if we are not sick or do not leave our cave. Seems the government knows better than we do. Didn’t this happen once or twice before? If they are culling out the old and sick then fine, but why not just sterilize the useless eaters and breeders who perform no functions for society? That would be a lot easier.



[License To Kill] Uh Oh!

[Unsurpressing Voters] In the 1970s California put a bounty on voters. Anyone could register a new voter and receive 25 cents for each new voter they signed up. People with clipboards were everywhere. There wasn’t a store that didn’t have volunteers outside its doors with their clipboards signing up new voters–and getting 25 cents a pop! The GOP ended that when they sued and made it more difficult to register to vote. I don’t know why they did that.
[What Could Go Wrong Department] The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission  is asking for the public’s help in stopping the spread of the invasive zebra mussel. This species might cause devastating impacts to Florida’s ecology and economy, and has recently been discovered in a Florida pet store and stores in other parts of the country. Link