2017 September

Tuesday, September 26, 2017

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsSince 2002
Published Tuesdays and Fridays. Letters to the editor with pictures.​


Attention Piners and Piner fans, I just found internet at the library and am putting together the Friday CT. It will be brief, hoping my $118 laptop from hell stays together. Come back in a couple of hours. Stay tuned!


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Post Irma rainbow. Avenue I. There’s no place like home.

[Free Labor] Pastor Ernie and Kay of the Community Church (on US1 in front of the old Habitat For Humanity store) say that a bunch of Army people are going to base their workers there. That means free labor to help you clean up this mess that is Irma. I heard they have chainsaws and the men to work them. It’s about time that one of the relief organizations is actually doing something that requires effort instead of just handing out water and bad advice.

I’m looking for my cousin Pamela “Pam ” Brooks, Big Pine Key. Last spoke to her 9/8 prior to Irma. She did not evacuate. DOB 9-18-54. Thank you, Dr. J. Lynne Douglass, 803-381-6854
Free Panama Jack high quality stuff is sitting outside their soggy warehouse on Quail Roost Trail next to the flea market. They are muddy, but you can wash that crap off quite easily. The distributor says come and get it (through his tears at losing a hundred grand).

When we returned to the mess we couldn’t figure out why there were so many light bulbs scattered around. It was Irma who unscrewed them from the light posts in the yard and from the fans in the (formerly) screened-in porch

One upside:  I don’t have to pick up my doggie’s poopie during our walk.

My prayers go out to all who have suffered the wrath of Irma. I am asking Eden Pine residents to be on the lookout for two blue kayak seats that attach to my kayaks (lost in the storm along with so much more). They are about 15″ x 10″ with a curved post that snaps into the kayak. If seen or recovered, please call Donna at (305)394-7706. Thank you and best wishes for a full and speedy recovery.

FEMA people at the flea market tent didn’t even know how to login to my FEMA account once I had registered. I asked four different FEMA people and none of them had a clue.


I bought dry ice thinking it much better than ‘wet’ ice. It is too good. It froze everything in the ice chest. Milk, creamer and–beer! After a crappy day doing hurricane stuff I sat down for a cold one only to have an ice cube in a can.

Jimmy Buffett should plan a free concert fund raiser for Irma victims.
Since my beloved avenues took it very hard will the people be allowed to replace trailers or will the vultures force them to sell because they can’t.when I saw ave. e  the sadness wore heavy on me.i so hope everyone made it through ok, new housing or just run us out!
What was the IRMA storm surge height in Eden Pines?


We may not have a roof or back wall on our BPK house, but we have our priorities, rght. God Bless America. We are strong and we will rebuild.

Did you see all the gas station islands’ aluminum roofs blown over? Driving down US1 it liked like a good half of them had blown over. There’s building codes for everything else, why not for those coverings?
What can we do to help? It appears from talking to a few Key’s friends, that Big Pine Key got hit far worse then Cudjoe. What do you need the most?
FEMA moved again, for the third time, but no one knows where too, as of now. They say it’s still on BPK
I was thankful for the free breakfast at the FEMA tent. I thought it some kind of broad noodles and cheese dish, but it turned out to be some kind of pre-digested scrambled eggs or something, totally without flavor or any redeeming qualities. I do want to commend them on their pancakes. They were so good I went back for seconds!
I filed my claim in an expeditious manner and got my Claim #. Two days after sheriff Roth opened the highway I was pushing my WD shopping cart back to WD for more supplies, both cars drowned, I couldn’t help notice appraisers from some insurance companies taking care of their customers. Hartford was no where in site. I called, TT a mrs. Tunisha Davis. After minimal conversation she transferred me to total loss, mr Christopher Hill, who I inquired as to why I haven’t heard from Hartford. Went on to comment about observing other companies on site dealing with their customers. Mr Hill commented that Hartford isn’t as good as those other companies. Mr Hill advised me my insurance covered a rental car from Enterprise. I informed him both Local dealers were not available because of Irma. Mr Hill advised me to find one that was available. I advised mr Hill that I’m a 77 year old 80% Disabled Veteran and have No transportation. Mr Hill did Not offer me any further assistance. The next day I was assigned an appraiser, mr Brandon Geary. Brandon contacted me arranged a meeting time. Met Brandon at BPK CVS and went over my Mini Cooper and Buick. Had an excellent repore with Brandon and felt that I would get a fair appraisal from him. Several days later I received an Email from mr Hill with the results. The appraisals were Fair as I looked at the used car value books before. Yesterday(Saturday)I called Johnson insurance, Mr Hill, Mrs Davis, Hartford total loss section to ask–WHERE’S the MONEY. Only got voice mail and no return calls.  I called Brandon, who answered and explained my situation-the Mini is financed and I’m Required to continue making payments even considering the circumstances as advised by the bank. I observed that my vehicles were being towed away without Hartford paying off the claims. So here I sit in my house with no money, no rental car, no transportation and I’m still required to make the Mini payment. The Buick was mine and there’s No valid reason for not paying me. I “heard” that it’s going to take 3-4 weeks before I get my money. So I’m sitting here unable to move from my home while Hartford is still collect interest on the money that they’re not paying out to their customers. After all it’s all about Hartford’s Bottom Line. So in my opinion Hartford has stolen my vehicles, took possession without paying me. Hartford has broken their contract with me by Not providing a rental which I paid for when I paid my policy. I feel that I’m an injured party. If anyone reading this can offer any advice or solutions for me I’d appreciate it.
Marathon has cable! I was in the Brass Monkey (doing research on alcoholism) and all their TVs were going. That’s great. What’s even better is that drinks are only $2.40 during happy hour. And they’re real drinks, free pour. If a for-profit bar can sell drinks so cheaply why can’t a non-profit bar like the Moose do it too?
Letter to the Editor.

Commissioner, I’ve been a NFL football fan for over 65 years. I like the game. I pay to watch the Game not to watch people make POLITICAL STATEMENTS. In my opinion the players who insist on Insulting the USA 🇺🇸 America are just nothing more than Racists trying to push their agenda. They are paid to play football, I paid to watch football. Politics have no business on the football field. I saw that the Pittsburgh coach(negroid)who must be a racist, DISRESPECT a former army ranger(caucasian)won a medal for Heroism because he chose to Respect his Country. There is no reason to show RESPECT “for the team”. IT’s FOOTBALL, a game played for my entertainment. Over the years I have observed numerous NFL players in SERIOUS Trouble with the law, particularly WIFE BEATERS. Just because an overpaid athlete puts on a team uniform, there’s no reason to show respect. RESPECT WHAT??? If your players have issues with the USA, I’ve got no problems with that–but their political issues don’t belong on the football field.

It appears that you’re more interested in appeasing a bunch of crybabies than considering the Overwhelming majority of the people who are paying to see Football not politics on the field. I see that NASCAR(which receives more than 3BILLION in sponsorship[twice what NFL gets])issued a statement in total support for their members to continue to show RESPECT For our Country. It appears that you’ve forgotten Who Pays the bill. Until you change YOUR attitude I will not spend my money supporting your OVERPAID crybabies.

Signed, Master sergeant Eugene E. Nanay Jr. US Army(Ret.) 30 year 80% military Disabled.

In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.        ~ President Theodore Roosevelt
In a world where you can be anything. Be kind.
Suggestion for free additional road side clean up:  Allow the scrappers from mainland to come in and get it
[HELP WANTED] Hi! I totally understand if it’s not yet appropriate to post this advertisement as I’ve personally seen how hard Big Pine Key has been hit and people may all be focused on their own homes at this time, but I wanted to send this along just in case there are folks looking for paid work while the area gets back to normal.


We are hiring debris monitors for long days at $18/hr plus time and a half for overtime. They do need a car which I know is a challenge for many at this time, but the job requires driving around to different DOT dump trucks and following them to the dump site. Information is attached and feel free to reach out with any questions. I wish you the best in your recovery. It has been amazing to see how the keys residents are looking out for each other.

Terry Thiele, Architecture RecruitermHDR, 3001 Washington Boulevard, Suite 200, Arlington, VA 22201, D 703.647.7781 M 571.302.0646

Well, Irma certainly gave us some insight into our county officials now didn’t it.  Some were cowardly, some were incompetent, and some were both.

While many of us in the Middle and Lower Keys were peeing in a bucket, our fearless leader, Roman “Get me an iPad” Gestesi ran away and was comfortably spending time in the Keys’ most posh community at the Ocean Reef Club.  Here’s a message Roman.  You should be ashamed of yourself.  Real leaders do so by example, not by conference call.  As the County Manager, you should be first in and last out when a crisis occurs.

Another of the bug outs was Kirk Zeuelch, the Director of the Aqueduct Authority.  He, who through many meetings and many presentations assured us that the new sewer system would function just fine after any storm (it didn’t), not only headed for the safety of the mainland, but was incommunicado for several days after the storm.  How sad was it to hear Authority Board members calling in to the radio station asking that if anyone had seen him, to please ask him to contact them?  But then again, what should we expect from someone whose only qualification for the job was that he was an influential Conch who had failed to be reelected to office?

County Commissioner Heather Carruthers was another one who headed for the safety of Orlando rather than serve as an example of concern for her constituents  Poetic justice that the storm hit there as well.

Mayor George Neugent and I have had our differences over the years, but I will give him credit for having the grapes to stay here and actually exhibit some leadership on the ground during the storm.  Though he pretty much ate his lunch when his passionately defended devices, the infamous grinder pumps, failed en masse, he and Sheriff Ramsey were the voices of authority during and immediately after the storm.  One of the few amusing moments in the whole scenario occurred when the radio announcer pressed him on what would happen when residents returned to find that they had nowhere to live.

“What would you say to them?” the announcer asked repeatedly.

Neugent, obviously at the end of his rope on that line of questioning, said, “I’d tell them to get their asses back in their cars and head back to wherever the hell they came from.”

Ever the politician however, at a news conference later that same day, the question was asked again.  At that time the Mayor’s reply was, “I would suggest that if they had the wherewithal that they return to a place of safety on the mainland.”

So why is it that taxpayers fund the construction of an Emergency Operations Center that can stand pretty much anything short of an atomic blast, only to have many of our county leaders cut and run at the first sniff of danger?

The blue tarp people moved, but I can’t find where
Sammy comes thru after the storm, even after he lost all–but his mind. He was there helping others. God bless him and his family. Friends like him make the islands paradise. And a shout out to Becky for her help!
Good morning, My name is Laure Philipon, I’m a French journalist working on a 52 minutes documentary about the Keys and how to rebuild after hurricane Irma. We are located in Miami.
The film will focus on people’s effort to restore the beauty and magic of the Keys.
The documentary will air on the channel France Ô :’d like to contact some official from Big Pine Key, could you help me in this ?Here is my cell phone: 786 630 1419. Feel free to contact me anytime.Thank you very much for your help,



[Where is Glenn Reber] Does anyone know how Glenn Reber on the Avenues in Big Pine Key is doing? Relatives up north have heard nothing from him and are very concerned. Thank you
Is it just me or are there many dazed and confused iguanas trying to cross the road?  There’s a joke there somewhere I just can’t figure it out.  I’m dazed from “where’s my mask, where’s my gloves, where’s my flashlight?”


When will they start picking up garbage again?

[We Need Help] With all of the reports of Key West being back in business why don’t they lend a hand to the areas more severely hit? I find it pretty shameful they are having these parties (the benefactors being Key West itself) yet I haven’t seen one volunteer or business from Key West helping from Marathon to Sugarloaf. What happened to One Human Family? More like One Key West Family
Fits the times!

It never ceases to amaze me how the sheep are being duped by the commies on the Left side of the isle. They have always wanted to destroy America and seem to be getting their wish. Wake up America and throw out that trash
Deer Ed, Humanity Road leadership mentioned your name/paper as the primary source of info for those who live in the Big Pine Key area.If so, I wanted to let you know that FEMA is here and supporting the local operation in various ways.
Email me and let me know if I can be of assistance in spreading the critical word for disaster assistance to your audience.FEMA PIO Kevin Sur
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