2013 June

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

The Coconut Telegraph

Anonyomous letters to the editor with pictures

The Original Unsocial Media

Classified Ads     Bulletin Board     Business Directory      Contact Us      Menu    



[Roadwork] Have you ever noticed that when they finish one road project another starts? Have you ever been through Miami when there wasn’t roadwork? It continues un-ceaselessly because there are thousands of full time designers, engineers, and worker relying on continued roadwork. The system is designed to never end roadwork.




Naval Air Station Key West will change command this Thursday at 10 a.m. at Boca Chica Field.  Capt. Patrick Lefere will be relieved by Capt. Steven McAlearney during this traditional Naval ceremony.

[Downstairs Enclosures] Marathon is out looking for home owners using single-family homes as multiple dwelling units.  This is something that needs to be done even more so in the areas outside of Marathon.  Most of the downstairs enclosures that are being rented out are first of all illegal.  The county is losing out on the sewer fees due them, development fees and monthly usage fees.  Taxes are not adequately paid.  There is so much wrong in most of these situations.

firing-squad6[Cuba] Julio Antonio Yebra M.D. shook the hand of each member of his firing squad and told them that he forgave them. The order to shoot mixed with his own scream condemning communism, and his lifeless body hung from the pole to which it had been tied. Seconds later we heard the final shot to the head. In one of the prison wings at the Presidio Modelo in Isla de Pinos, Cuco Muniz and Armando Valladares were having a conversation in front of cell 35 when a human shadow fell from above and crashed on the cement, down below. It was Jesus Lopez Cuevas. He had thrown himself, in a suicidal jump, from the fourth floor. He was dead.

Pedro Luis Boitel, former candidate to the presidency of the University’s Student Federation, believed that human beings should demand respect for themselves through any means. He undertook a tenacious hunger strike which led to international repercussions and complicitous silence. He died dehydrated on May 24, 1972, after 53 days without nourishment in a Cuban prison. Before then he had taken part in many hunger strikees.

Fortunately, Mario Chanes de Armas survived that hell, but at the price of spending 30 years in Castro’s prisons, which turned him into the longest held held political prisoner in the world. Chanes de Armas suffered such fate in spite of having participated alongside Fidel Castro in the assault on the Moncada Barracks in Santiago de Cuba, on July 26, 1953; after having taken part in the Granma trip from Veracruz, Mexico, landing on the eastern coast of Cuba, in 1956, which would mark the beginning of the armed struggle against the Batista regime and which found him, on the eve of the Revolution’s triumph, in one of Fulgencio Batista’s cells. Link 




[Cookies] What’s in a name?

Between Michael Douglas and Taco Bell, the lesson is clear: Don’t eat tacos.

[Mosquito Control For Lakes]  If the lake is big enough the Skin-S0-Soft poured into it will keep spreading out on the water surface until it is a film about one molecule thick.  You have to look real close from the side to see it.



If getting your daughter ready for school requires a toolbox–you might be a redneck dad!

[“Praise for Mosquito Control spraying”] It’s not praise it’s relief!

Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email.  

manhole eyes an


[Sewer Bill] I just got a $9000 bill for my sewer to my single-family home. Or I can pay $310.29 yearly for 20 years at 2.4% interest. We’re in an area not connected to the sewer so we’ll have to have a crap factory installed, but no one I talked to can give me any definite information. I called the out-of-town number for the crap factory, but they had the most misinformation, plus they didn’t even know where Big Pine Key was. Something stinks and it isn’t the sewer!

How about we ship all the nuts who kill and claim the insanity defense, to Iraq or Turkey so they fit right in?

Fanci Seafood will be closed on Sundays until August. Everyone have a great summer!


[Developers] Balfour Beatty – want to see who you are in bed with? Link

Balfour Beatty implicated in “massive fraud and ” biggest fraud in British history.” Here’s who we are dealing with – and we expect truth from them and their attorneys? Hah! Link



[Cod Fish Arch] Welcome flags, birds, a boat, and an arch made from bales of codfish greeted Crown Prince Gustav during his 1887 visit to the Norwe­gian port of Hammerfest, one of the northernmost towns in the world.

USA computer download speeds suck the hind tit.  Where is Al Gore when you need him? Even Estonia has faster download speeds than we do. Link



[88’s] Whoa, thank you for that cogent, non cynical explanation. I was afraid the number came the group Crazy-88’s  in Kill Bill!


[Drowning Doesn’t Look Like Drowning] In many child drownings, adults are nearby but have no idea the victim is dying. Here’s what to look for. Link



The sun is captured in a “starburst” mode over Earth’s horizon by one of the Expedition 36 crew members aboard the International Space Station, as the orbital outpost was above a point in southwestern Minnesota on May 21.

[The Environment] If one is to be vigilant about not exterminating insects species, etc, does that mean that I should cancel my order to have my home tented in order to get rid of the roaches? 
Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email.   


[“Star gazing on the shortest nights of the year”] Pretty cool that the image accompanying the post got the approximate time of year for the event correct within the ballpark. If it ever happened!




[Fresh Water] 24V Patrol Pak powers a portable water purification system. The system was turning salt water into fresh drinking water! Link

eagle5[To the 22 year US Marine] Thank you and Semper Fi. It is nice to know that another Marine is close by and has your back covered. You called it correctly. It was a long time ago and a bad time in history, but a good time in that I made it home. Our country divided itself over that war. We are divided now.

“A house divided against itself will fall”. We are falling fast. Going to war in Iraq and Afghanistan has cost Marines a lot because both of these wars have been politically managed. I was shocked to see Marines used as traffic guards and pacifiers. If you send in the Marines, send us in to kill the enemy – period! Do not send in Marines to direct traffic and fix school buildings. My family and I thank you for your service and also your post on the CT correcting the ‘expert’ on Marines and spit.  

[?] I was told dish washing soap old style works best it takes the buoyancy out so the eggs sink and still fine for animals used it works on any standing water


Looking for a very part time person to help fill our snack vending machines. This position would be perfect for someone wishing to supplement their income. We can work around your schedule. The job involves driving a box truck and lifting cases of soda.   The individual needs to be dependable and have a clean driving record and references. If interested Classified Ads


[?] [“My Birthday Gift”] It was a Rollex, you ninny!





Free TV. Older, but works great. Cudjoe Key. Classified Ads

[“Just think if we had a nice ghetto to visit”] We do it is between mm 30 and mm 17.

Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email.   



Cover all your bases with this TOXIC t-shirt

Older versions of Yahoo Mail and Mail Classic are shutting down. Pay attention!  Link

Mother Earth News. Link

bear5Owsley Stanley (the maker of the most famous LSD in the world — Purple Owsley. It had a little purple bear on the tablet. Like Michael Douglas, Owsley Stanley also had throat cancer that his doctors claim was from HPV. He claimed it was from all of the second hand smoke he inhaled at concerts.) recorded Phil Lesh from the Grateful Dead on bass, Mickey Hart on drums. They had enough LSD in 1971 to blow the world apart New Riders of the Purple Sage opened for the the Dead on this tour.  Enjoy, pet your deer, drink your Good Food Conspiracy juice.  Jerry is the greatest!

Jerry Garcia on pedal steel — ‘I Don’t Know You’

Neil Young spent sixty five million dollars and now he’s writing books and trying to put the iPod under. “Waging Heavy Peace” was an interesting read and his music calms me more than 10 mg Valium! Link




Mega awesome water slide. 

[Apple Loses to Samsung] Apple is facing a ban on US imports of some of its devices, in the first patent ruling against Apple in the US to actually affect sales. The ban only affects Apple’s older devices, including the iPhone 4, iPhone 3GS, iPhone 3, iPad 3G and iPad 2 3G, after a U.S. trade agency said they infringe a patent owned by Samsung.

The US-based International Trade Commission (ITC) ruled in favour of the South Korean tech giant overnight, though the ban covers models that are made in China and no longer actively sold in the US market. This means that imports of the devices are now effectively banned.




New gimmick on cruise ship. Video

[Conspiracy] You know what I find really strange here on the C.T.? That when a person comes up with a pretty good conspiracy theory, someone always posts, asking to show some kind of credibility to the subject that person posted. When the person takes the time to show or present some pretty credible stuff as requested, there are no comments afterwards. Or someone re-butts with some real lame explanation that makes them look weaker than the argument or proof they requested. Why is that?

The person who posted his, or her rebuttal about the New World Order, made some very interesting points. Then the response to the rebuttal was, “how can corporations here in the U.S. have so much power, when they themselves are struggling.” Really? The oil, pharmaceutical, Haliburton, Wall Street, Kraft and Monsanto corporations are struggling? The Stock market is at an all-time high braking records almost daily. Is that struggling?

Just like the person who posted that explanation for chem-trails the other day. the explanation was a credible explanation for con-trails, but not when it comes to chem-trails. I’ve been observing chem-trails since I found out about them, and that explanation is by far the biggest non informative explanation I’ve seen so far.

Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email.   

[It’s Great to Be Alive] A quadriplegic comedian. Video




[Dolly the Llama] Florida police had to subdue a llama with a taser because …well, because its Florida. Oh, and the llama’s name was Scooter. On Sunday, a seven-year-old llama named Scooter escaped from a penned-in yard in Tallahassee. Scooter then outran authorities for a long time before three county sheriff’s deputies, using a taser gun, could finally subdue him long enough to be brought back to his yard. The deputies put a lasso around the five-year-old llama and then had to resort to using a taser, because llamas don’t respond to voice commands. Scooter was unharmed by the taser, but it did calm the animal down enough for authorities to load him on to a trailer.

Owning a llama does not require a permit in Florida, where it is considered a domestic animal. Get yours today!

Deer Ed, Please send that highway sign from Indiana about Beware terrorists, to me so I can send it to my friends at Notre Dame, they will love it.

Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email.   

mng5[Cuba] The Cuban people are not as happy as some would have us believe.  “Cuba’s ranking was on the bottom of the Press Freedom Index 2008 compiled by the Reporters Without Borders.  Cuba was named one of the ten most censored countries in the world by the Committee to Protect Journalists”.

The opposition movement in Cuba is a widespread collection of individuals and nongovernmental organizations, most of whom are working for the respect of individual rights on the island.  Some of the best known Cuban members of the opposition include the Ladies in White (recipients of the Sakharov Prize for Freedom of Thought), Martha Beatriz Roque, and Nobel Peace Prize nominee and Sakharov Prize winner Oswaldo Payá, as well as Oscar Elías Biscet, and Jorge Luis García Pérez “Antúnez.” The movement is violently repressed by the State despite its nonviolent strategy for change.

These “prisoners of conscience” are contemporary not from 1959. It reminds me of Ming The Merciless from Flash Gordon – “All my citizens will make merry under penalty of death”

[Music] GatorRock has outstanding videos from actual films and TV shows of artists in live performances. Fantastic classic Country and Rockabilly, new and old! Videos

nira tocco realtor 9.12

an_camera_flash_cartoon[Youth and family fishing photo contest] Florida Keys National Marine Sanctuary, in partnership with the Sportfishing Conservancy, will host the 2013 Sanctuary Classic – a free, summer-long fishing photo contest designed to promote sustainable recreational angling in national marine sanctuaries. The nationwide contest opens on June 8, World Oceans Day, and ends on Labor Day, September 2, 2013.

The Sportfishing Conservancy will award weekly prizes for photos that show fishing in a national marine sanctuary. Additional prize scholarships will be awarded for the four pictures that best exemplify youth fishing, family fishing or conservation in a sanctuary. As this is a photo contest, catch-and-release is encouraged and all participants are asked to follow The Sportfishing Conservancy’s best practices guidelines.

By focusing on photographs, we’re able to encourage angling participation while promoting the joy of ethical catch-and-release fishing. Recreational fishing is a memorable way for children and families to experience the sanctuary. Learning about fishing rules and proper techniques for catch and release helps foster a sense of responsibility for our marine environment.

This is the second year of the Sanctuary Classic. For information on the 2013 Sanctuary Classic and how to enter Bulletin Board

[Insult] Sexy news anchor Nicole Brewer bitches out weather lady on live TV. Great video of a master’s class in highly public passive-aggressive behavior. Video


[Spitting Evidence] Contrary to the claims of the wretched leftist CT posters I easily found many accounts published in the 1967-1972 period claiming spitting on servicemen.  And remember when a lefty blog like Snoops says it isn’t true… it usually is. Link



Wait, what are they, zombies?


I noticed you have this cool bug scratching it’s head. I am a bed bug expert and would love to use that as an illustration in a book I am writing for kids. What is the possibility? (Ed: Sure, use it. Most of our images are purloined anyway.)

an_rip wave skeleton


[Cemetery Preservation Workshop] On June 20th the Florida Public Archaeology Network will conduct a cemetery preservation workshop in partnership with the Historic Florida Keys Foundation. The purpose of the workshop is to promote stewardship of marked and unmarked human burial sites.  During the class in Key West, we will study cemeteries as historical resources, compare federal and state laws that protect burial sites, become aware of the Florida Master Site File program, learn about Ground Penetrating Radar as a management tool, and practice hands-on landscape assessment and headstone cleaning. For more infomation Bulletin Board

[“The Original Unsocial Media”] Deer Ed. Love it: The Original Unsocial Media. (Ed: I was wondering when someone would pick up on that. Thanks.)

no spit5[Spitting] Dumb American kids blindly followed their f**ked up government by invading a foreign country for no good reason killing 1-2 million of its occupants. Yes, they did kill babies, women and children–that’s war. It’s no wonder those that refused to invade Vietnam spit on them. The protesters were the people paying attention, not blindly following their leaders in Washington. History has proven that invading Vietnam was wrong. The Domino Theory was wrong. The whole war was wrong. Spitting on serviceman was wrong! 
Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email.   
[Captain Doom and Gloom] “IRS is keeping an eye those fascist right wing kook groups like the Tea Party” Here, read why the the New Tea Party was formed.  The same premise! Link 
religion politics zone

[Delusional Vet] “trying to take God out of America when America was founded by Him.” That’s news to me? I always thought it was the founding fathers. “America was built on men and women that fought bravely because they trusted in God to prevail in battle.” The vets I know stopped believing in god during Vietnam and they didn’t prevail in battle–we lost. Yes they were doppers while over there. I wonder if the 2 million dead Vietnamese believed in God or the 58 thousand dead Americans believed in God.



Kudos to Obama for appointing Susan Rice as his National Security Advisor. Ms Rice is a hawk and closely aligns ideologically with her two most vocal critics, John McCain and Lindsey Graham. How odd is it that they share the same hawkish opinions but she is condemned just because she’s a Democrat?

Republicans lost the election because they are out of touch with modern day America. They are like the aged Soviets who long for the days of Stalin.

[Obamacare] The Right continue to scour the Internet for bad news about Obamacare just like they did with the “Granny Death Panel”. Typically they are against anything that is good for average Americans.


I was most disturbed by Tuesday’s post about a Marine’s belief in God from his Vietnam experience. Vietnam proved there is no supreme being, what is this Marine thinking? just ask the 2 million dead Vietnamese if there is a god.  They’ll say yes because the comfort of fantasy is ingrained in them and us. How about the half million American youth killed in Vietnam? or the returning vets who are f**ked up? do you think they didn’t pray to some imaginary supernatural being? Many of them did, but it didn’t change a thing–not one thing. It never has and it never will. That’s just how it is. I wish there was some supreme being, it would make life easier to have someone to fall back on. 

Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to the email. 

Why does someone ask FTR a question and then go on to tell him how he must answer it? Then he gets upset with FTR when FTR doesn’t answer the way he instructed him to.  Yes or no only applies in court, not on a bulletin board, sheeeeeeeeesh!


[Debt] Seventeen trillion dollars of debt that is rising every day: Where can we see this DEBT and who owes whom what? It is all lies and spin to keep us at bey! Link

[NRA Party] No, we did not spend our extra cash. We cut back on lots of advertising since our NRA party. We so damn busy since then its hard to keep up. And by the way. Thanx for the kind words and great people we met at the sugarloaf  school funfest. We are looking forward to coming back up there soon. And SSSHHH don’t tell anyone but in early season we gonna have another NRA gun raffle and party like the last one. Only this time we courting a cple Real southern rock bands that liked our party and offered to ride down for us. Key west and the keys aint all hippys and NY libs yet!

[Spittle] Seems I upset a few folks by speaking my mind and saying I believe that the poster telling us about being spit on and how he went on way more missions then the average Marine was a fraud. I stand by that assertion still. You asked me to leave political ideologies out of it but I was referring to the original poster doing that very thing. You don’t even realize you agree with me. The only thing I stand publicly for is I stand by my stated belief.

Another poster said and I paraphrase “You don’t know cause you were not there”. Sorry maybe you as the other poster stated should have asked me first if I was or not. I was. I served from 1972-thru 1978. I was 16-Charlie M.T.R.  operator (missile fire control crewman). I also changed my clothes before I left base but not because I was trying to hide from terrible civilians that disagreed with my service and I was proud to be serving. I did it to feel more comfortable traveling and nothing more.

So keep your wrath to yourself and I apologize to anyone I may have offended but as I said I stand by my original position. End of discussion. You’ve been dismissed.


right only grey

cicada medicareFor some mysterious reason it seems that the Medicare cicadas have arrived at The Coconut Telegraph. Yesterday they seemed full of righteous indignation. One by demanding to know if I “enjoyed” Medicare. Yet another, apparently a female, first demanded information about my views of Medicare, and then graced us with the following: “Clarity, FTR, clarity and please come correct. I always do, its called maturity.”    Deer Lady myself and many other members of the CT community are happy that you always come correctly. I must confess that I never knew that there was an in correct way, I guess I’m just not mature enough. Perhaps as I approach your age I will gain the wisdom that you profess to posses.

Yep, the reality that is the beast of Obamacare is about to bite us.  California is the land of  liberality, milk, and honey. But in fact it’s just been reported that the average 25 and 40-year-old will pay double under Obamacare what they would need to pay today, based on rates posted at (NASDAQ:EHTH). Read more at: Link

More specifically, for the typical 25-year-old male non-smoker, the average Obamacare “bronze” exchange plan in California will cost between 64 and 117 percent more than the cheapest five plans on eHealth. For 40-year-old male non-smokers, it’s between 73 and 146 percent more.   The literature is replete with similar stories nationwide.

For the lazy liberals amongst us, and in a show of Republican comity, here is the posting that I submitted the day before my knee replacement surgery May 9th. My view could not be clearer: I wrote: “ Part 2) Let’s think about a couple of Democrat shibboleths.  The first is the oft repeated charge, meant to be a pejorative,: “Republicans are angry old white men”.  Deer Friends I submit that there is nothing wrong with being old, white, or angry at the terrible state of our current governance. Further, the many young Republican women office holders throughout our nation prove that to be false. Young Republican women are Mayors, Governors, and legislators. The second canard is that Republicans are determined to cut Social Security and Medicare.  Somehow Democrats have convinced themselves that Republicans, acting on some sort of evil scheme, are anxious to wreck SS and Medicare. Even worse, they want you to swallow that crap sandwich.

Their propaganda doesn’t make any sense. Why on earth would a gaggle of old folks set out to kill a program that is of such great import to each and every one of them. The fact is that we Republicans are dead set on reforming both programs so that they can continue to exist and provide for the benefit of today’s old farts and tomorrows old farts. Unless we have the stones to reform SS, Medicare, and Medicaid, they will stall crash and burn (that’s aviator jargon). Tomorrows old farts will be sh#t out of luck and quality medical care unless the Democrats start thinking and quit delaying the reform.

Personally, I am well aware of the benefits provided by Medicare. First, please be reminded that I have made payroll contributions each and every pay period from the time that Medicare came into being. In addition, like most conservative folks, I also paid for health insurance for my family. Very recently, since the specter of Obamacare, we have just seen big, very big increases in our Medicare secondary medical insurance premiums.

There is no doubt about, Republican’s, especially old ones, really like Medicare.   Most sentient folks do like it. Without Medicare my quality of life would be substantially degraded. So far, under Medicare, I’ve had to have both hips replaced with prosthesis’s. I’ve had to have my right knee replaced with a prosthesis. If you read this about noon Thursday, I should be in the recovery room at a Ft. Lauderdale hospital with a brand spanking new left knee prosthesis.  Without Medicare I would be a functional cripple. So, if you think that “angry old white men”, or any Republican of any age or gender, or mood, especially this happy old fart, are dead set on cutting or harming Medicare, you are spectacularly wrong.

And so, I’ll be out of school for a few days, hopefully just a few. But I look forward to reading CT on my phone.  All the best!



Deer Friends, even to those lazy slugs who refused to take the time to check out the foregoing, my position on Medicare could not be any clearer. Obamacare is the enemy of Medicare.

Respectfully submitted:


No Name poster yesterday said that the pro-electric are still wining..Yes we are,The county said it would be 2 months before we can get the permit to built a 500 room 36 houses around the basin and open it to the bay..Way take so long.We now have the electric to do it..Then a restaurant will be net and maybe a Publix