2013 July

Friday, July 19, 2013


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(Saturday, July 20, 2013. The Coconut Telegraph is not published on Saturdays)

Finally Friday — George Jones



This is the found homing pigeon on my patio in Key Largo.  He is very friendly and beautiful but still can’t hold him to get his tag ID.  It looks like 12707 but there must be more.  If you know who this bird belongs to email me at

Coincidence?  There are 24 hours in a day and 24 beers in a case. What do you think?

nira tocco realtor 9.12

[Guard Railings on Canals and Docks] We never fall in the water, but we can’t drive, that’s why the railings are on the roads and not the canals. I don’t think people are stupid enough to need the ocean fenced in yet.
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Did you know that if you decapitate a vegan they can continue to talk about being a vegan for another 6 minutes?

[Sewer Math from FKAA Provided Billing Rates]Residential water base monthly charge = $13.27
Residential sewer base monthly charge = $27.05
Water cost per thousand gallons =$5.57
Sewer cost per thousand gallons = $10.24

As you can see sewer service will cost twice as much as water, so you can pretty much figure however much you are paying for water, you will triple that when sewer is added. For example if you are a 2 person household that uses the Florida average of 85 gallons/person/day, that’s 5,100 gallons per month.
Your water bill will be $13.27 + ($5.57 x 5.1) = $41.68
Your sewer bill will be $27.05 + ($10.24 x 5.1) = $79.27

That will total $120.95/month for a 2 person household. Doing the same math for a 4 person household the total will be $201.03/month. So take your present water bill and triple it. That will be your new water and sewer bill. Pretty much holds true if you are seasonal or year round.




Zombie candy bar contains human flesh. 

I googled the latest grinder pump horror story and guess what? The Bilfinger Corp newsletter came up again. And I didn’t read it this time because whoever is posting these stories doesn’t want us to. I smell a vulture circling for money.


Did you know TSA allows searches on valet parked cars at the airport? This is not to say vehicles self-parked at the airport aren’t ever subject to search. If the Department of Homeland Security, which oversees the TSA, were to heighten security alerts, it could initiate random inspections of vehicles entering the airport roadways and parking lots. Link



[Wood Lamp Shade] This is nothing to do with sewers or grinder pumps (thank god) but maybe why lamp shades cost so much. Video

[“Mosquito spraying or not, $4500 or not”] This is your price to pay and your burden to bear for living in your version of ‘paradise’. I lived there, don’t anymore and it’s quieter, cheaper and nicer than your ‘paradise’. Big negative is the fishing isn’t nearly as good, however, not nearly the number of ‘courtesy/safety’ inspections by the water police.

Life is good – enjoy it wherever you choose to live.



[“Bonfires Banned from beaches in California”] I thought they banned fires on the beach in the early 70s. We used to have fires on the beach at Santa Barbara in the hippy days and it was great fun until a madman slaughtered several people with an ax. Fires on the beach were banned after that in Santa Barbara ending a wonderful period in time. 

Butterfly habitat limits mosquito control. Link


[Grinder Pumps Failed] Rockridge. What does this tell you? It tells me to up my mold and mildew insurance so the insurance companies take the hit to replace my home if the sewers back up. Thanks for the warning.

an jackass


There’s a reason tech support doesn’t video chat.

FKAA strategy:  Tell the lie often enough and well enough, and people will believe it. How can gravity cost more than installing grinder pumps where they aren’t needed?

Kirk C. Zuelch, Executive Director of FKAA was on US 1 Radio’s Morning Magazine with Bill Becker Thursday morning. Bill stated that the Cudjoe Regional customers were still upset about the grinder pump issue, and asked if FKAA is considering any changes.  Zuelch said, “No, a month ago at the meeting the County Commissioners decided they are not going to throw any more money at that project.”  End of story.  FKAA  keeps saying gravity systems cost more money–outright lies.

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Whip appears 174 times in the Old Testament and cabbage appears 30 times. No other vegetable is mentioned.

All levels of government — indeed all arms of government — compete against one another with the goal of having power, influence and wealth, so that the lives and the destinies of ordinary fishermen and people who live off the water can be directed and controlled.



The USS Maine enters Havana Harbor on Jan. 26, 1898 for the last time. Boom!

[Sewers] Reading your comments on the sewer program I see that some of you are still hoping to get this service for free. You will have to pay for this service just like sewer installation projects everywhere in the state have to pay. All homeowners pay for this. Sorry but it is true.

fanci ad 7-16-13

[More bar wisdom] Some days, the only thing I look forward to is cracking open a cold beer.



[“Whites have never been discriminated or enslaved”] I am again amazed by the selective memory of those who only want to see their side of an issue. According to Wikipedia: “The Arab slave trade was the practice of slavery in the Arab world, mainly in Western Asia, North Africa, East Africa, and certain parts of Europe (such as Iberia and Sicily) during their period of domination by Arab leaders. The trade was focused on the slave markets of the Middle East, North Africa and the Horn of Africa. People traded were not limited to a certain race, ethnicity, or religion, and included Turks, Europeans, and Berbers, especially during the trade’s early days.” (continued below in Long Winded Tomes)

[Slaves] Whites have never been discriminated or enslaved so the comparison is absurd: Hey Dude, wanna a free trip to Russia or the Middle East to see how long you last as a Free White Man? Whites were slaves long before the people of color in every country.



[Detroit Files for Bankruptcy] Take a good look at what is going to be happening to many cities through out America.City pensions & benefits are to large.When theirs is more going out than coming in there must be a change.Government is to big, to costly.Local,state and federal.We,us the tax payer can’t afford you guys.It will get fixed one way or another.

[Colors] If you are black, brown, red, yellow or white it does not matter, it only matters if you are poor. How many people of color and rich are in prison, do bad things, hate other colors? If you ain’t the color of money–you ain’t!


Lets say these Grinder Pumps are a rip off and they fail like crazy, can we sue the company and or the waste management people for doing us dirty? If not, why not? Who do we call, Poop Busters?



How did you guess I helped design Key West airport’s new layout design & signage? 

Unless your kid’s fundraiser is selling wine, I don’t want any part of it. 




Smoke Kingfish is in the case at FANCI SEAFOOD!  







Mini Lobster season is July 24 and July 25. We have complete Lobster Kits, Dive Flags, Nets and we also have 50lbs of Ice for $5.00. Come and visit our new store at 22290 Oversea’s Hwy (MM 22.3) in Cudjoe Key. 

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faq teacher an


[Coconut Telegraph FAQ] Most insults will be deleted. 60-70% of all post contain an insult. Some posts are all insults and no content so they are useless to post. FAQ 


an_orchid grow[Key West Orchid Society] It’s a home visit to Nadia Dudai’s garden at 750 United St in Key West. 11am to 2pm weather permitting. If it’s more than just a passing shower check with Nadia: 786-877-0118.

If you’re coming from up the Keys and don’t know your way around KW, take US1 Roosevelt Blvd turns into Truman Av. Turn left on White St., then right on United. Temple B’Nai Zion is on the left at the corner of Royal. Turn left onto Royal and enter at the white gate behind the Temple. You’ll be amazed at the wonders Nadia has done in this garden.

The July get-together is on the 4th Sunday of the month–one week later than usual. July newsletter > Menu > Continuing Events

[Sewers] Mystery solved. River City, Missouri has finally found the culprit behind all of the strange happenings around town in the last two years. Residents have complained about strange noises in the night. Small pets have mysteriously disappeared or come home whining and shaking. There have been reports of dimming lights, gurgling sounds, and random power failures. Medical officials have been seeing increased stress and alcohol use among residents.

The Sheriff’s Department found that all of this has been caused by the grinder pumps installed when the town put in a sewer system seven years ago.

Call the FKAA and tell them that we don’t want to be stressed out alcoholics with psychotic pets who bark at grinding noises or, worse than that, lose their lives attacking the pumps. Tell the BOCC that we don’t want our houses to be haunted by grinder pumps. (no link provided because I am hoping that you are too lazy to check my story)



Finally a goodl reason for those big wheels.

[“Cracker vs Nigger”] You call me a “creepy ass cracker,” then I call you “nigger.” You don’t want to be insulted, then don’t cast the first stone. Black people will behave like the rest of us whether they like it or not. The freebie gravy train days are over. They do not get a free pass to be criminal and lazy for what happened centuries ago and they cannot hold present day white people guilty for things they never committed.

Blacks will, whether they like it or not, wake up to the fact that pointing fingers at everyone from Whitey to Hispanics to Asians to anyone else for their troubles isn’t going to get them anywhere. The “you owe me” mantra has run its course. Get off your ass and earn some respect instead of thinking it’s some sort of government handout. Blacks have given innocent white people an enormous amount of undeserved grief over the years and I, as a white person, am not apologizing anymore. Enough is enough. Stop committing so many crimes and we’ll stop profiling you. You know-common sense!


[Race] The B’s (N is not used) are laughing their asses off at the stupidity of the white posts on the N word. No wonder the white race is not going to make it. Ask a Chinaman.




Free attractions and free things to do in all 50 united states and over 1,500 US cities. Listings include free museums, free parks,  free concerts, free parades, free festivals, and free zoos. Link

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[?] It is such a beautiful sight to see all the poverty pimps in action all trying to outdo the others on these posts , attempting to rehash their tired old rhetoric emanating from the other poverty pimps in power, a unthinking mind is indeed a terrible thing to waste. A serious fact regarding the human condition is evidently beyond their grasp. or perhaps a better way would be to say serious thought requires concentration and mental effort, an effort which if successful would no doubt conflict with their ideology and in the world of the left ideology is everything.

an break club

Play famous golf courses around the world. Game

[Major Art Theft] signed by Picasso, Matisse, Monet, Gauguin, Lucian Freud and Meyer de Haan. Her son had just been arrested on suspicion of orchestrating the art robbery of the century: stealing masterpieces in a brazen October-night theft from the Kunsthal museum in Rotterdam.”

“She hid them in various places, including her sister’s home and her garden. Then, she said, she buried them at the village cemetery. But that did not end her anxiety, she told the police.”

It’s possible that those bits of cinnabar, chromium green, lazurite, and tin-lead yellow found in Olga Dogaru’s wood-burning stove are not what’s left of the hundreds of millions of dollars worth of paintings for which her son was arrested for stealing in Rotterdam. But why lie and say you burned them? And yet, why burn them and not lie? Link

isaksen-flood 4.23.13

[“Martin did not attack Zimmerman”] Yes he did. How the hell do you define an attack?



Trayvon Martin was carrying a can of Arizona iced tea, and a bag of Skittles. Just like a youngster to enjoy candy and sweet tea, eh?  The following link, shows that Arizona iced tea and skittles mixed with cough syrup, turns into a drug that causes psychosis and aggression!

Doesn’t that sound like what happened when Martin attacked Zimmerman and was beating and pounding on him? The autopsy showed liver damage that is consistent with DXM (dextromethorphan – cough syrup) abuse. Link

[Zimmerman] Why is everyone talking about the stand your ground law and the Zimmerman trial. Zimmerman pulled out his gun in self defense for he was in fear for his life as his head was slammed repeatedly against concrete. Zimmerman was cleared of all charges once by the local law and now has been cleared in a court of law by six of his peers. If you fear for your life in any state and have to use lethal force to save yourself it is not murder or manslaughter but legal to protect yourself. Just like the castle law, you kick in my door it will be the last thing your legs do as I will have blown them off as soon as you enter. That is the law and one cannot wait around for the law to arrive, you have to protect yourself and family from thugs.

These generations of welfare takers, and only those who break the law to supplement their government dole, are now a little worried to kick in those doors. This is a good lesson, a hard one, but good example of a area that has been robbed over and over and just will not put up with the poor overworked police, who do everything possible, but they cannot be everywhere and that is where one (no matter what color you are) has to protect what you have worked for and not let some thugs just take what you have earned.

All you greenies who keep saying solar power is the answer to everything may want to check out the following article. It seems solar is the most expensive of all the alternative energy sources. But don’t let facts get in the way of your feeling good. The base numbers came from the latest US Energy and Information Administration report. Link



Geoffedia is what newsman around the world are using now instead of going to the place news is being made. This amazing site aggregates social media, etc to get instant breaking developments, photos and opinions. Formally if a newsman couldn’t go to the place making news he would subscribe to AP, UPI or Reuters News service. Now he can now cover any event around the world at home and in his underwear if he wishes. All he has to do now is zoom in on the area of their online map of the world.  Video




Eco for profit in the Keys. Ever notice how nature changes once we start trying to save it. Look at the reefs for a start. A Fort Lauderdale firm wants to build eco-lodge in a deserted plot in the upper Keys. Link

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[“Stevie Wonder is an idiot”] Stevie has said he won’t perform in Florida again until the stand your ground rule is done away with, boo hoo.

[“Stevie Wonder is an idiot”] Unless you get into Zimmerman and Martin’s head, you don’t speculate nor judge. I agree with Stevie, as I would have done exactly the same thing.


If you question yourself you’ll get a different answer every time. Stick with your gut feeling and first choice.



Someone told me the pyramid cap for the Washington Monument is solid cast aluminum and serves as a  lightning rod. I wondered why it was made of cheap aluminum and found that aluminum was a newly discovered material and considered exoticl at the time. Aluminum was only around for 5 years and no one really knew how to cast it yet. Link

[Keyboard Challenged Post] scotty idiot hav e the gall sit at northbound sumerland bus stop to marathon for va an talk contractor bout wk truck ran over left leg now miami va redid titium screw broke in knee, jackson memorial did intial just asked for 830million taxpayers for expansion seems they could spare enogh bucks get of streets (mangroves) cant remove great trying va disability signing for lawyers for ssi not crying however homeless wearing me out if someone has used laptop w-wifi at least keep contact (dvd be great free at bp library) can use an older conversion van too! anyway thanks 305 942 0967 or stay dry!

[His Brother Writes:] still hoping for used laptop with wfi hell aint asked get run-over n-bound summerland bus stop now va redid the left femor knee cant remove titium screws
too close to femor trying get get va disabilty an now ssi if can help 305 942 0967 not crying have a good day


[Ann Coulter] To avoid looking like a criminal, don’t commit a crime. Link

fkaa-ct[Captain Doom and Gloom]Bonfires Banned from beaches in California” Just because those who ban such activities cannot get any.  Look at those in charge of most municipalities. The Holy’s, the Puritan types, the worlds losers who cannot function in the real world so they try to change things so we obey them. This is the reason wars are started, why religions are demeaning, why the frustrated are rioting. Live and let live, but carry a big stick, I say, and legalize prostitution everywhere! Amen.

If anything shakes up the junta, especially in the Keys, it is when the people want real value for their tax dollars. If the local big shots feel they will be pressured into cutting back funds or–shudder, gasp, tremble–give refunds (the most obscene word in the political dictionary) then things change. They start running and hiding. Never will the citizenry get money back from the golden fleece buckets. Bet on it!

“A neighborhood watch has only two general orders: observe and report, do not pursue.”  Where did this BS come from? When you are having your head smashed into the concrete, you defend yourself any way you can or die trying. Get out of this sissy green frame of mind Americans have be suckered into. Be a man, a woman and stand up for yourself! If you are dead the only things that respect you are the worms.

“County Commission is looking for a few good projects to fund” Here is an idea. Just take all our tax money and ship it to Haiti or Cuba or Detroit to help the poor move to the Keys for free habitats, food, insurance, medical, and transportation, that should make everyone feel better. Who needs sewers anyway in the Keys? 

religion politics zone

FTR 18 July: “The Zimmerman/Martin episode has given our liberal brethren a cause célèbre to stir the pot of racial discord.”
FTR 17 July: “Team Obama and others are doing their level best to ratchet up hate against white persons.”

Who’s stirring the racial pot? It ain’t me!

Only FTR could turn the killing of a young black man by a Hispanic man into a political issue. Its kind of sad when you start politicizing American deaths. My how far/ desperate some have fallen. Now they cant use the “Obama turned it into a political issue” because he wasn’t the person posting it.


[“Republican Party has been taken over by the far right”] The Republican party has been taken over by the left! They have over-stepped the center to the left side ever since running John McCain for president.

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from the right

Well, well, well, it seems that quite a few members of the CT community have their shorts in massive wedgie. These folks are full of self-righteous indignation of my contention that the term “Cracker” or “Cracka” is every bit as noxious as is the term “Nigger”. It is an amazing slice of human idiosyncrasy that it is perfectly acceptable for a white person to call another white person a “Cracker”, but that term when used by a black person is intended to be a serious insult/slur. The converse is also exactly as perverse, the use of the term “Nigger” in discourse between black persons is perfectly acceptable, but a white person using that term is decried as being a slack jawed racist. Look Friends, I didn’t make any of this up, it is simple and plain fact. I suggest that you check out the definitions to be found at Link

words19One critic in particular took such deep offense that s/he resorted to name calling. That’s not unusual from the critics. Ho hum.  That critic has decided that this Olde Fart is a racist because I am of the view that Americans of African descent have every bit as much chance of becoming whatever they wish to become as does any one of any racial heritage. For the life of me, I cannot understand why that view is racist.  Can you? The evidence of the truth of my belief is everywhere around us. Simply look at the current resident of our White House. How can the critics deny the achievements of black persons in all segments of our society. It’s interesting that the critics did not mention that, but they do all in their power to deny it.

The current hot issue being ginned up by Obama in the black community,  is the “Stand your ground” laws. As an aside, why in the hell do we still have a “black community?” Why in the hell do we have a “Black constituency?” Do you think it is the construct of white people? Once again the facts do not support the pot stirring. Over 90% of all black persons murdered are murdered by black persons. Obama and his AG Eric Holder most definitely are doing all in their power to energize the black community and to further convince them that they are being victimized because of their racial heritage.

The name calling critic’s writing of my racial heritage was simply wrong. I do look Caucasian. But, as I have written in the past,  I have every bit as much Aboriginal American blood flowing through by veins as does our President have African American blood. My father lived and died on the St. Francis Indian reservation, PQ. I actually have paperwork to prove it. He was a member of the Abenaki tribe. The tribe was initially displaced from its homeland by the English and thus became allies of the French. They were vicious and ruthless fighters. They were the target of germ warfare by Rogers Rangers, then American colonists in service to the English. The English paid handsome bounties for Abenaki scalps, scalps of men, women, and children. Their entire settlement was razed by Rogers, nearly all the Abenaki men, women, and children were slaughtered. To finish the job the Rangers left blankets and clothing that had been used by smallpox victims at the site for the few survivors to use and to spread smallpox. The fact is that my ancestors were victims of racial persecution, they were slaughtered because of their ancestry, they were driven from their lands, they were demeaned and shunned. They got over it. Do I even need to mention the slaughter of Aboriginal Americans and the seizing of their lands throughout the west and even here in Florida? In fact there actually is a compendium of racial slurs aimed at Aboriginal Americans. Link

Americans of Japanese heritage were shunned, discriminated against, driven from their homes, even imprisoned because of their ancestry during WW2. They got over it.

The incontrovertible fact is that while racial hate may live in the hearts of any of us, blacks and whites, there is no longer any institutional racism. I firmly believe that far too many Americans of African ancestry blame racism for their personal shortcomings. I’ve known far too many professional persons who were black and who pulled themselves out of ghetto life to believe otherwise. I’ve hired them, worked with them, and worked for them.

I challenge those who are of the view that racism is responsible for the sad situation of so many Americans of African ancestry to suggest to us a solution.  

It’s time for leaders of all races to let history be history. We’ve waged war against Germans, Japanese, Italians, etc. Now we are allies and friends.

I have no need to defend myself against fatuous claims that I’m a racist. I know what is in my heart and I’ve got a long personal and professional life that proves to the contrary.

One of my many beefs with the Obama administration is that they seem addicted to using the false claim of victimization and exploitation of Americans of African ancestry to further their political agenda. To me that is craven exploitation, to me it is shameful.

Detroit_16Part 2) Detroit has filed for bankruptcy. Union mandated pensions are a huge component of their fiscal woes. Democrat have historically used Democrat controlled union dues to elect Democrat government officials who would approve pensions that were unsustainable. The chickens have come home to roost. Democrat mis-management of the city for decades has played a huge role in their woes..

Here’s some hallmarks of Democrat governance of Detroit. Police response time is 58 minutes, the national average is 11 minutes. Detroit has spent more than $100 million each year since 2008 than they took in. 40k structures or land parcels lay vacant/empty. 36% of Detroit residents live below the poverty level. Detroit had the highest violent crime rate for cities of over 200k in 2012.  City of Detroit pensioners can expect to lose up to  90% of their pensions. It is the largest municipal bankruptcy in our history.

There is a lesson to be learned for all. 


(continued from above …) “During the 8th and 9th centuries of the Fatimid Caliphate, most of the slaves were Europeans (called Saqaliba) captured along European coasts and during wars. However, slaves were drawn from a wide variety of regions and included Mediterranean peoples, Persians, peoples from the Caucasus mountain regions (such as Georgia, Armenia and Circassia) and parts of Central Asia and Scandinavia, English, Dutch and Irish, Berbers from North Africa, and various other peoples of varied origins as well as those of African origins. Toward the 18th and 19th centuries, the flow of slaves from East Africa increased with the rise of the Oman sultanate which was based in Zanzibar. They came into direct trade conflict and competition with Portuguese and other Europeans along the Swahili coast.

White slavery existed for centuries; there were Irish, French, English and even American slaves that suffered the same as the black slaves. Oh, and let’s not forget what the Bible tells us about the people enslaved by the Egyptians.

Slavery, regardless of the race of the person enslaved is a shameful blight on humanity at large. To acknowledge the shameful acts and pain that was inflicted is only right, and we should be always be aware of how ALL races can be cruel because the human being can be cruel, but to cling to history forever and use it as an excuse for everything that is contrary to your own beliefs is unacceptable.

Black people are just as prejudice against white people as whites to blacks. But that doesn’t make a media sensation for some reason.

Please don’t tell me that the term Cracker isn’t racist when it is what a young black person calls the elderly white tourist he is beating and robbing off of Duval.

Why don’t black people get as worked up when a black man is murdered in cold blood by another black man for a car, a bag of dope or the street that he lives on? Why do black people turn a blind eye to the murders that occur on their own street every day?

I suggest that everyone work on making their own corner of society better before they demand that someone else corrects theirs.

Not that anyone cares but I believe that the ”Stand Your Ground Law” has been a mistake from the very day that it made the law books and Travon Martin’s mother would gain more respect if she was on a campaign to have it erased permanently.


Winds of change are blowing through Reuters’ environmental coverage. One of its three regional environment correspondents “is no longer with the company” and the other two have been ordered to switch focus, people inside the agency say.

A perceptible shift in Reuters’ approach to the global climate change story has attracted international attention. Scientists and climatologists as well as non-governmental and international environment bodies have detected a move from the agency’s straight coverage towards scepticism on the view held by a vast majority of scientists that climate change is the result of human pollution of the atmosphere and environment. They see generally fewer stories on the issue. Some say they have been taken aback by Reuters’ new direction and are concerned that this could contribute to a change in government and public perceptions of climate change.

The Cult’s getting scared.

A United Nations expert has condemned the growing use of crops to produce biofuels as a replacement for petrol as a crime against humanity. It was, he said, a crime against humanity to divert arable land [in third world countries] to the production of crops which are then burned for fuel in wealthy first world countries. The UN special rapporteur on the “right to food”, Jean Ziegler, said he feared biofuels would bring more hunger. Link