Letters to the editor with pictures since 2002.
Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage days, Tuesdays and Fridays.
The Un-social Media with 60,000 Followers
 [Old Days] Captain Conch had a food truck next to the aquarium before they were a thing. Best conch fritters on the rock and some really “special” brownies. Good to know a few of us survived the 70’s. The picture is of Fredrick carrying his electric brownies in the paper bag while making deliveries. He would make the rounds selling his Godsent Brownie Company brownies to Captain Conch who would resell most of them. The Captain did a brisk business in his black market bar too. You could get a homemade 16 ounce Bloody Mary for a buck.  How about a bag of pot that he would put in the bottom of the fritter bag with the fritters on top. That was a popular menu item also. He had a unique way of folding a brown paper lunch bag in on itself to make a handy way to absorb the oil and eat the fritters. Oh, those hippies were so clever! |
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| [Gender Notes] Women’s shampoo: “For dry or damaged hair” Men’s shampoo: “6-in-1 for hair, body, face, dishes, dogs and car” |
 [Spalling 101] The poor folks in Surfside condos. You can wager the concrete mix during construction had a little seawater “additive”. Builder saving a buck 40+ years ago. God bless the deceased as well as their families. Video |
| The history of the Key Lime Pie began with Cuban sponge hookers (no, not putas) and by fishermen creating the prototype of the pie. This was somewhere in the earlier part of the 1800. Then the story segways to the William Curry mansion on Caroline St. in Key West and Ms Aunt Sally’s wonderful concoction. My wife’s family, the Carey’s, are documented as arriving from the Bahamas to Key West in 1809. And the history of the Keys is interesting |
[Old People Humor] This will be lost on most of the under fifty crowd. Audio |
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[Bass Ukulele] Just what you’ve been waiting for: How to choose the best bass ukulele on Beginner Guitar HQ. Link |
| [Tropical Storm Elsa] The Florida Keys may be in the forecast cone for Tropical Storm Elsa, but expected impacts appear to be minimal given the storm’s track and speed. Link |
As if “Dancing Sandwiches” weren’t enticing enough! |
| A pair of black sneakers found on Duval Street turned out to be very large palmetto bugs. |
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[Condo Crash] Florida Keys News is the only news source that is not insisting that concrete failure brought down the towers. Link |
| Everything’s the Governor’s fault because he OK’d the return of cruise ships to Key West. The only money they bring in is docking fees and the tourists wreck the town spending zilch! Thanks Mr. Governor. |
Kids, Don’t play with fireworks. Let the adults who have been drinking all day set them off. |
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| [Friday Joke] A priest, a minister, and a rabbi want to see who’s best at his job. So they each go into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it. Later they get together. The priest begins: “When I found the bear, I read to him from the Catechism and sprinkled him with holy water. Next week is his First Communion.” “I found a bear by the stream,” says the minister, “and preached God’s holy word. The bear was so mesmerized that he let me baptize him.”They both look down at the rabbi, who is lying on a gurney in a body cast. “Looking back,” he says, “maybe I shouldn’t have started with the circumcision.” |
 [Gender Identity Just A Fad] The current fad of Gender Identity which is causing so much Political controversy was first identified in 1957 by John William Money who called it “The Gender Identity Disorder”. So there you have it, little Joey Male, who thinks he is little Nancy Female has a mental disorder. That’s ok until he tries to involve others with his feelings of frustration. Is everyone required to accommodate his (Joey) fantasies? That’s all right because just like all the past fads like poodle skirts, mooney hub caps, zoot suits, hoola hoops, pet rocks, mood rings, rap music, this too shall pass. |
| It looks like the 2021 storm season is upon us and Tropical Storm Elsa is the first to crash into the Keys. |
[Canada Day] Canadians are celebrating the kidnapping by Catholics of hundreds of thousands of native children who were then brainwashed to mimic Europeans’ behavior. Link |
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 [The Snail with the Right Heart: A True Story] This is a children’s book that my friends gave to me. Completely delightful and informative. The story is a science lesson for children and adults alike. I bet you’ll learn something. Scroll down the page to the story which starts where you see big quotation marks. Link |
| My male member was known as a WMD, but today it’s more like a tire valve. |
Why does Toyota have a cowboy hat for a logo? |
| [Friday Joke] An 85-year-old man was told by the doctor that he needed a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, “Take this jar home and bring back a sperm sample tomorrow.” The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor’s office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, “Well, doc, it’s like this first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. ‘Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing. “We even called up Arlene, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezing it between her knees, but still nothing.” The doctor was shocked! “You asked your neighbor?” The old man replied, “Yep, none of us could get the jar open] An 85-year-old man was told by the doctor that he needed a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, “Take this jar home and bring back a sperm sample tomorrow.” The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor’s office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, “Well, doc, it’s like this first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. ‘Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing. “We even called up Arlene, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezing it between her knees, but still nothing.” The doctor was shocked! “You asked your neighbor?” The old man replied, “Yep, none of us could get the jar open |
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