2014 April

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsThe Original Unsocial Media
Anonymous Letters to the Editor with Pictures
Published Daily by Noon Since 2002 – No Saturday Edition

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[Grinder Woes] Yesterday a friend came home and discovered that a grinder pit had been placed in her yard without her permission and without an easement signed. Not only that, two neighbors also had grinder pits installed without easements being signed and without permission.

The Department of Environmental Protection refuses to enforce their own rules or EPA rules against FKAA. Now FKAA just enters your property when you are not home and installs a grinder pit against your permission. It becomes abundantly clear that there is no law except against the victim. I hope the three hardware stores nearby are well stocked with pitchforks.

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[Free Dogs] I’m looking for someone to adopt two beautiful female dogs. A 3-year old yellow lab mix and a 1-year old chocolate lab mix. Both are spayed and up to date on their shots. They are house trained, sweet and very good with kids. They just need someone who can give them the time and attention they need. Classified Ads > Free

The Lucky’s Landing redevelopment on Little Torch reminds me of Hawks Cay as seen from US1. Super ugly. Super tacky. Visually ruining the shoreline.

I never even noticed the RVs and trailers there from before when driving over the South Pine Channel Bridge.

I always thought central sewers were about increasing development density, because you can’t increase density on septic tanks. When the brilliant rocket scientists at FKAA came up with a bloody awful grinder pump based sewer system, I thought maybe I was wrong. It is gravity sewers that facilitate development. But looking at Lucky’s, I see the future Keys–high density clusters with their own collection systems just pumping to a forcemain pipe in the road.

Nira-Tocco 760w



I took this picture Friday after a wonderful happy hour (or two) at Springers. The oleanders stood out among his collection of things in the back parking lot.

When the legal counsel for Dump The Pumps deposes the defendants, please find out why we had to have the sewer system in the first place? Additionally the poster that posited about the amount of water used on BPK made a good comment about septic tanks replenishing the freshwater lens.

computer love laptop

This new font size is terrific–no glasses needed! Yippee, we love our Big Pine (Ed: And we love you too!)

Who says the Little Torch cottages are going to be affordable? No one builds something on the water to be affordable.
[“Dumbing Down of America”] Don’t forget Ebonics and the almighty texting.
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[“Keys survivalist should should have seeds stockpiled for a survival garden”] What disaster will last long enough that I can grow food? Right wing extremists is the only disaster I can imagine. Nuclear war? Prevailing wind will probably protect us from fallout. I don’t think the Keys will be targeted for anything except by the Moral Majority or right wing hate groups. What paranoia drives you folks? There are enough decent folks in the States who can defeat any misguided violent force from within. We’ve got guns too!

[“Font Size”] I’m not sure what’s up with all the comments, it looks great to me on PC, iPad, and iPhone. I wonder if it’s a user setting that’s getting uncovered with the new format?
[“Fresh water lens“] A question for the poster who voiced the concern about the fresh water lenses on Big Pine when all that fresh water is diverted from septic systems to central sewer: How do you think they functioned before all the houses (and septic systems) were built on the island? Did I miss something in your posting?

oil can drip

[“What happens if I put too much oil in my car”] You’ll blow something, like a gasket. Get back under and drain some off. If it’s new oil, then strain it and put just enough back in. Also don’t always believe gas stations if they check your oil and say you need more, especially the out of state ones. Some might even show you the dipstick pulled fresh out of the engine and it appears nothing is at the end. Instead feel with your finger, synthetic oils appear clearer than traditional oils.

For the person complaining about the font size, just hit “control +” until it is the size you want.

“Control -” will bring it back down.

“Control +” means that you hold the control key down while hitting the plus key.

No need to redesign the site! (Ed: Thanks for the good info, but most people view the CT on smartphones and that’s what the all the writers were complaining about.)

Pope Francis is not only the spiritual leader of one of the world’s major religions: He’s also the head of what’s probably the wealthiest institution in the entire world. The Catholic Church’s global spending matches the annual revenues of the planet’s largest firms, and its assets—huge amounts of real estate, St. Patrick’s Cathedral, Vatican City, some of the world’s greatest art—surely exceed those of any corporation by an order of magnitude. Link


I saw this wanted picture of killer at the Big Pine post office the other day. There wasn’t a reward offered. I think she’s too mean, and nasty to be apprehended by yourself. Just be careful. Big Pine is a dangerous place.

I like the larger font. Yes, it means more scrolling but my fingers are in better shape than my eyeballs.
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[Lucky’s Landing] I don’t think there will be any “shack trash” in the Little Torch modulars. I heard the rents are going from $2000 to $2800 per month.
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[Dating the Keys Diseased] Just take your credit card and make a chopping sound with it on the bar-top.

[Spies like US] Seems the NSA corruption of encryption standards was even worst that first predicted, allowing for even faster decryption of sensitive transmissions. The bad guys discovering this to easily crack any encryption sent online could explain a lot of server data breaches and the abundance of malware on the Internet. Can’t have partial security, either it is secure or it isn’t! Link
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A wise man speaks because he has something to say. A fool speaks because he has to say something.



Hi there from Springers Bar and Grill. It’s Italian Tuesday and today we have a great special for you, farfalle (bow tie ) pasta with shrimp and lemon butter. It’s light Italian fare at its best. Join us for this palate pleasing tasty treat.

Tonight we also have The Doerfels at 6:30. It’s their last performance of the season here at Springers and you don’t want to miss it.

Remember: Always something special at Springers.

One learns things every day, imagine this. There are some who actually believe that the Catholic church has had, is, having problems, surprise, surprise. And to think it is an entity  created by human beings and yet they are having problems, will wonders never cease?   We are presented with a litany of evil machinations  numerous enough to choke a government mule, yet when hinting at the relevance of such dastardly acts and chicanery, implying without saying that such acts should be measured with the good that the catholic church has indeed accomplished, one is relegated to the great unwashed society with the rest of the know-nothing nerds who know little about the real struggle taking place on earth.  I would expect that Ideology has a huge bearing on some folks’ interpretation of  the relevance of facts, particularly when they parallel their thoughts on the subject or subjects being discussed.
Dennis-Ward 760w
Dumbing Down of America = Teachers Union = a unlimited supply of Mickey D workers. Change = Charter Schools = E=mc 2. You pick what America you want for your kids.
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soylant shake4

The Soylent Green / Ultimate Keys Survivalist reference yesterday was so damn funny I spit coffee and ruined my keyboard. I must have forgotten to include or provide the correct link to the real Soylent, a soon to be shipping product that recently has gotten FDA approval and it doesn’t contain people, at least not yet (haha!). Link

[“Keys survivalist should should have seeds stockpiled for a survival garden”] The first questions is, why would anyone need a survival garden? During extended widespread disasters, food production and shipments might get disrupted. Most grocery stores (our big Winn Dixie) only have a few days worth of supplies in their warehouse. When the panic buying kicks in, those stocks could be wiped out in a matter of hours.
The Soca crime family on Stock Island got busted on Jan.10 with 10 kilograms of cocaine, 7.5 grams of crack cocaine, two pounds of marijuana, about 2,100 Xanax pills, about 1,300 oxycodone pills, more than $250,000 in cash, and 700 short lobster tails when they raid­ed the property on 6th Sheet as well as a shed off Maloney Avenue and a commercial fish­ing boat, according to the gov­ernment.

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[Low Fat Potato] My friend cooked us dinner with some newfangled low-fat potatoes that she bought at Publix. Not only is the idea of a low-fat potato crazy, but how many women would love to know about it. They aren’t edible, especially if you mash them. To be polite, we all tried to eat them, but they were like glue. We couldn’t chew them, only smack our mouths up and down. When pulled from the bowl they left a tail of goo. The next day getting the pan, bowl and utensils free of the dried glop was just as bad. The stuff just wouldn’t come off. I say, skip the low fat potatoes for sme reliable russets.

[Obamacare] A new poll today shows 76% of Democrats approve of Obamacare while 49% of all Americans approve of the controversial (to say the least) bill.
Springers 760w
No Americans were killed in Afghanistan last month!
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shoe black girl silver

[Death by Manolo Blahnik] A Houston woman attacked her boyfriend in a fit of rage, sat on him after knocking him down and then stabbed him to death with the stiletto heel of her shoe.

[“Calls for documentation”] The CT is opinion and sometimes facts. Criticizing about post that don’t cite sources, etc is for the New York Times editorial board not some guy sitting in his underwear spouting his opinion at ten o’clock at night.
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[Taco Bell marketing team] “Look, they’ve bought all the other disgusting crap we serve, so why not make breakfast?” 

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[GM in Trouble] GM’s CEO Mary Barr is going before Congress today after meeting with the survivors of those killed from her defective cars. She might be able to claim that she’s new to the CEO job, but for many years she was a top executive for the company and surely knew that the ignition switch was junk. The corporate culture of GM would have kept on letting people die if left to them because, after all, profit is more important than lives. 13 lives lost and countless injuries and damage must be accounted for. GM must pay and should be forced back into bankruptcy.

[“Keys survivalist will have excellent fishing skills, a desalination system”] Ha! The real survivalists know they only have hours to get the hell out of this one road death trap after the electric and water are turned off. The Keys are the worse place to be when the crash comes. Think logically not emotionally!
Accurate 760w
Michael Jackson is out of debt. He has made over a billion dollars since he died.
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[“Trim back his foliage from over the canal”] Can I trim back those aluminum ‘branches’ sticking out that hold up boats too?

Who in the world approved the density for what’s going up at Lucky’s Landing? The developer may be exceeding the density.
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from the right

The Battle of Monmouth was an American Revolutionary War battle fought in New Jersey on June 28, 1778. It was one of the biggest and most consequential battles in our fight for freedom. But few know that the climate was an enemy of both sides. The troops fought in 100+ degree heat, both sides lost almost as many men to heat stroke as to the enemy.

BattleofMonmouthThe 1896 Eastern North America heat wave was a 10-day heat wave in New York City, Boston, Newark, New Jersey and Chicago that killed about 1,500 people in August 1896.

In the summer of 1901 New York City suffered the deadliest heat wave in its history. From June 29-July 6th at least 989 individuals perished in weather so hot it melted asphalt and drove scores of New Yorkers insane.

Man caused global warming?

The bitter winter of 1816-17 resulted in a freezing of New York’s Upper Bay deep enough for horse-drawn sleighs to be driven across Buttermilk Channel from Brooklyn to Governors Island. At the New Lebanon, New York Church Family of Shakers, Nicholas Bennet wrote in May 1816 that “all was froze” and the hills were “barren like winter.” Temperatures went below freezing almost every day in May. The ground froze solid on June 9. On June 12, the Shakers had to replant crops destroyed by the cold. On July 7 it was so cold that everything had stopped growing. The Berkshire Hills had frost again on August 23.

Colonial America, like nearly all of the northern hemisphere suffered winters that were much severe than today.

This year 90% of the Great Lakes froze over for the first time in decades.  NOAA labeled the winter that is now drawing to close as being one of the coldest on record.

We hear a lot about the effect of atmospheric C02. Some global warmers are lamenting that we are due for major worldwide heating because the C02 has reached @400ppm. Sounds dire doesn’t it! But let’s look back at earth’s history.  During the later Cambrian period, atmospheric CO2 was about 7000ppm, the climate was generally warm, wet, and mild. The Cambrian period was marked by an explosion of life on our planet.

Man caused global cooling?  Man caused global warming? Man caused climate change? Or is the world’s climate in flux as it has been for millions of years.

Our climate has always changed, and it will continue to change as long as the earth exists.

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