2016 April

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsSince 2002. Published Tuesdays and Fridays
Letters to the Editor with pictures

(Ed: This Friday I will be changing the Coconut Telegraph’s address from to the more secure So you existing shortcuts, saved links, bookmarks, or favorites may no longer work. You have to tell the internet the new secure address by typing, one time only, the new address of into your browser’s little address window near the very top; and don’t forget the s. )

an_for-rent2[Landlording in the Keys] I have just realized that I never need to go to Disneyland ever again. If you want the wildest ride in your life do what I just did. I listed a nice clean 2 bedroom mobile home with a big yard for cheap on Craigslist. That’s when it started.

I am looking for a long term renter that takes care of the yard and lets me know if something needs fixing. It’s 24 hours later and I am tearing out my hair on the 27th caller. I didn’t answer any calls before 9 am this morning so there were more. Some people were so nice, however with sewers coming soon the trailer can’t handle 6 people and 3 kids. My favorites didn’t have the security and first month. Each only $950.
Everyone wants it even without seeing it. Apparently a lot of people are living under or behind someone’s house in trailers that have to move because the owner must get sewer connecting permits and inspections. When I asked some of them where they lived now it was addresses of mansions. They are the illegal enclosure residents. Some were pretty normal, some were over medicated and some had landlords who charged $1,500. My favorite of that list were the ones who the landlord was willing to pay to leave!
I had a nice girl call that was willing to live in her car in the driveway with her boyfriend until he got his next check. They have no idea that electric has a deposit if you don’t have an account.
My saddest one was a man who stuttered and said he was in Key West and wanted to stay that night 9:30 pm. He found out he didn’t have long to live and drove to Key West to die. He couldn’t find a room for the night. I had Charles Eimers flashbacks. He said he could stay a year at the most. It was like the ‘Leaving Las Vegas’ movie.
I am at the point of waiting until there are 10 good ones to pick from. I have started telling them all to just come see me at the Flea Market at my booth, Cody’s Discount, by the picnic area. My worst case would be that I get 500 new customers with no money, but there might be a few good ones in the crowd.
Big Pine is completely different than anywhere else. We stick together and it’s not what you know, but who you know. It’s hard to tell young people that if you moved here with no money you won’t last a year. I am surprised how many got ripped off on apartments in Key West for $2,000 a month plus $800 for utilities. Sharing a house has a whole new meaning if you don’t know your roommate is gay.

As I am writing this I got 2 more calls, both offered $3,000 for the just the mini lobster season week. I don’t speak Spanish so it might have been the same family. I am keeping this story vague on porpoise because I want a renter who knows me as a local. If I am not at the Flea Market this week, find me in the mental ward in Miami.

[“World news”] Most American viewers are not interested in world news that is why there is so little of it. One of the only places to get world news on TV is Al Jazeera America (Comcast 107). Unfortunately it goes off American TV at the end of this month due to the low oil revenue in Qatar who owns Al Jazeera America. The most excellent TV world news is still from the BBC (Comcast 171). They’re always good.
onedrive logo[Tech Support] I’m looking to pay someone for phone support to help me set up Microsoft’s OneDrive to work on all my devices. It’s not as easy as just watching the tutorials. As a matter of fact, it’s very complicated. I want to be able to access my OneDrive files from all my devices. You would think that I would be able to just login to my OneDrive account and be able to access all my files, but no!
[Wisteria Island] This week FEB Corporation and Roger Bernstein, the wannabe owner/developers of Wisteria Island, have lost their case before the Eleventh Circuit Court of Appeals.

When most local politicians seemed all too ready to allow real estate moguls to build their posh hotel resort, who would have thought that an old Navy letter penned almost a century ago was going to place the federal government in front of the bulldozer and save the last desert island in Key West harbor? The battle over Wisteria Island is one for the storybooks. Over the past 9 years it has known the most bizarre of twists: Developers wining and dining local politicians were ratted out by their waiter. A spy they hired, named “Dirty Joke Dennis,” went to prison leaving, on a sinking boat, a stack of their compromising letters. When the environmental value of the island was under attack, endangered sea turtles showed up and for apparently the first time ever were documented by FWC nesting on the island.

goat pawing ground[“Pig in house”] If the woman in Key West can have a pig, why can’t I raise them too?  And some cows for milk and a goat for cheese? A guy named Falkner used to keep a goat in his house on Peacon Lane.
[“Radioactive drinking water in the Keys”] Wow man, is that why I’m getting a cool glow at the bar?


The sources and influence of water quality on the marine resources of the Florida Keys. Video

[Fat Albert Will Return] Cudjoe Key’s spy blimp is getting a new skin and just waiting for favorable winds for re-inflation (which should be in 2018 given the recent weather).
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[Crooks] You go to a doctor in good faith to get your body fixed. You sat in the waiting room for an hour then talked to the doctor for 10 minutes without any procedures. Bang! Your insurance company gets a bill for $1,000. That works out to $6,000 per hour. And we bitch and moan about kids wanting $15 per hour for flipping burgers just to make a living wage. Piracy is alive and ill in the medical field!
man-of-war-humanAs a person who spends a lot of days on the ocean, Portuguese man-of-wars are bad boys. Tentacles up to 165 feet long can change your day. Dragging your trolling baits by one can cause a real problem when it comes time to change baits and your hands contact the fine tentacles that have broken off and stuck to the tackle. Even dead & dried out on the beach they can still do the dirty deed. Many folks who feel the sting are carted off to the ER or doctor’s office. Best bet–stay away–they can wreck your day.
Portuguese Man-of-War on National Geographic. Link
[“Backup to an external hard drive and never lose anything”] I thought you were smarter than that. plug it in? That is the whole point of the other post—electricity. Click and it is all gone! External HDD’s are not steam powered old boy. (Ed: If there is no longer any electricity in the world we won’t need computers. I doubt that will happen. External hard drives are the foolproof solution to data loss.)
an_manatee_and_baby[More Manatees to Hit] After nearly five decades on the federal Endangered Species List, the West Indian Manatee has moved up a notch on the recovery scale. The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service has decided it’s time to reclassify the iconic “sea cow” as “threatened,” no longer as “endangered.” The proposed new designation, announced January 7, acknowledges population increases throughout the marine mammal’s range since at least 1991, when aerial counting surveys began. The recovery is especially significant in Florida, where the manatee population has increased 500 percent over the last 25 years. The population in Florida is now at more than 6,300 animals (only 1,267 were counted 25 years ago). To boaters in Florida, the change in status would have no effect on existing boat-speed limits and protection zones, including the more than 50 manatee-protection areas.

Manatee deaths and injuries due to collisions with commercial and recreational watercraft have remained constant (roughly 20 percent) for the last 40 years, even as boat registrations quadrupled. Water-control structures, entanglement in fishing gear, cold stress, disease (such as red tide), and loss of habitat also account for manatee deaths.


[Rust Never Sleeps] This is rust. It’s caused by oxygen and called oxidation. We breathe oxygen every day. If it can do this to a chain, just imagine what it can do to your lungs. Help raise awareness about the danger of oxygen.

[“Where can I get sterilized”] Evidently if you’re a male, the place to get sterilized is Mosquito Control. If you’re a female just sleep with men from Mosquito Control and all will be good.
sticker-token free
[The Movies] How come no one ever uses tooth paste in the movies? They brush their teeth but there’s never suds or drool.
skunk sprays perfume


[Skunk Sex] In the animal world, sex often involves what would be considered rape or sexual assault in human civilization. So I wondered if when a lady skunk is not in the mood, does she spray the unwelcome suitor with her strong cologne? Like dating wasn’t tough enough, huh mister skunk?

Several FKAA executives live in Key Haven. You may be aware that FKAA paid several million dollars to acquire their private, extremely leaky wastewater collection system and substandard treatment plant. FKAA also recently took over the extremely leaky collection system and substandard treatment plant at Boca Chica. Our sewer rates will go to patching the systems and transporting the waste streams elsewhere. However, effective January 2016, little restaurants, bars, trailer parks, triplex homes, condos and so forth that were assessed over 2 EDU will have to have very extensive testing done of their piping at their own expense, witnessed by an FKAA inspector. I know for a fact that FKAA’s brand new sewers were not tested as rigorously and would not all pass the draconian requirements of FKAA’s new policy. The new arbitrary requirements include, but are not limited to, air pressure testing and smoke-testing of the piping, and salinity tests of the wastewater stream. “Sorry, folks- we have to close the restaurant for pipe testing.” “Sorry, residents- we have to turn off your water and there will be no flushing today while we test pipes for FKAA.” This will be an oppressive burden and probable big expense to the few little trailer/RV parks that remain, including the Breezy Pines RV community association, as well as to places like KOA on Sugarloaf, Big Pine Motel, Looe Key Tiki & Resort, No Name Pub, and more. Is this another effort to shift ROGO units to big developers and put more small businesses under? If FKAA really cared, they would not have given us the extra rate burden of fixing Key Haven’s private sewers, nor Boca Chica’s. Note also that these connections did not pay the $4,500/EDU assessment that Big Coppitt and the CRWS did. Now I am wondering about the leaky sewers in Venture Out. What was the settlement agreement there? Here is a link to FKAA’s new arbitrary requirements. Link
sheriff-app[Sheriff’s App] The Monroe County Sheriff’s Office app, available for smartphone and tablet users, alerts users whenever the sheriff’s office sends messages. Users receive notifications and updates about the traffic situations throughout the day. “We use this feature to reach out to people when something important takes place; perhaps a major accident which is expected to close the road for a significant period, or a brush fire in the Everglades which might affect the highway, or even during hurricanes when we need to reach out with important updates,” said Sheriff Rick Ramsay. The sheriff’s office app is available for both Androidbased smartphones and for iPhone. It works on both types of tablet computers as well. It includes the ability to view arrests and mugshots for the past seven days, view the sheriff’s WebCAD (live calls for service), see sexual offenders and predators and allows people to browse the sheriff’s office blog, Twitter feed and Facebook postings. Visit the Google Play store or the Apple Store and search for “Monroe County Sheriff’s Office” to download the app.
[“World news”] Americans aren’t interested in world news unless it relates to us. Example of no one cares: South African President Jacob Zuma on Friday apologized for a scandal over 20 dollars in state spending on his private residence and said he would abide by a Constitutional Court ruling that he should pay back some funds. He tried to tell the court the money was spent upgrading his home’s security, even the gold bathroom fixtures. Link
[Good News] Americans are flooding back into the job market at the fastest pace since before the Great Recession, encouraged by steady hiring and some signs of higher pay.


[“The Colorful Commish” is Dead] Former Key West City Commissioner Tom Oosterhoudt died peacefully at Broward Medical Center on April 1st. He also published Conch Color magazine in 2005

[Cuba Travel] Contrary to a ‘certain’ customs inspector in Key West, public performances are allowed as a lawful reason to travel to Cuba. The border agent told a returning Rolling Stones concert goer that attending a concert is not classified under the public performance category. He’s wrong and doesn’t know his job.
Man-'O-War-stingMan ‘O War season is here and with winds offshore from the south, the Man ‘O War jellyfish may well be in nearshore waters.  I’ve been told by people who have had the unfortunate experience that it’s like getting whipped with a white hot wire and the intense pain can last for hours.  If you get hit with a Man ‘O War, rinse the area liberally with sea water — not fresh water, as fresh water will cause more stinging cells to fire and do not use vinegar as a remedy as vinegar will aggravate the sting. Use something to remove any tentacles still clinging to the skin, but not a bare hand. Use a credit card, stick, sea shell etc.  If the sting is severe, seek medical attention ASAP.
The most important decision you can make is to be in a good mood.  ~Voltaire
[First Slavery Law in Rhode Island Colony] It was in the midst of these dangers and dissensions that on the 19th of May, in the session of 1652, it was “enacted and ordered … that no black mankind or white being forced by covenant, bond or other wise shall be held to service longer than ten years,” and that “that man that will not let them go free, or shall sell them any else where to that end that they may be enslaved to others for a longer time, hee or they shall forfeit to the Colonie forty pounds.” This was the first legislation concerning slavery on this continent. If forty pounds should seem a small penalty, let us remember that the price of a slave was but twenty. If it should be objected that the act was imperfectly enforced, let us remember how honorable a thing it is to have been the first to solemnly recognize a great principle. Soul liberty had borne her first fruits.



[The Movies] In the 1954 sci-fi movie Gog, robots start a nuclear reaction. After defeating the robots the pointy-breasted lady passes out from the radiation. When she awakes in the hospital she asks the lead man, Richard Egan, what happened. He replies, “Oh you just got a little too much radiation.” Video

[Companies Hoarding Cash] In an unprecedented trend large companies are holding on to their cash. Google has around $8o billion sitting in its bank accounts or other short-term investments. With $8o billion, Google could buy Uber and its Indian rival Ola and still have enough left over to buy Palantir, a data-mining start-up. Or it could buy Goldman Sachs outright or American Express or most of MasterCard; it could buy Costco or eBay or a quarter of Amazon. Surely it could use those acquisitions to earn more than 2 cents on the dollar. This strange vogue for corporate hoarding seems to have begun around the turn of the millennium. General Motors is perhaps the most extreme: It now holds nearly half its value in cash. Apple holds more than a third. These numbers are maddening on their face. If the companies spent their savings, rather than hoarding them, the economy would instantly grow, and we would most likely see more jobs with better pay. In the 1990s, when companies saved far less of their profits, they built new factories, bought new buildings. In part because of all that corporate spending, the 1990S were a period of low unemployment and high growth.

The feeling among them is that there is going to be another “next big thing” and they want to be ready to buy the companies that will be making it happen. This has never occured before.

vacuum iclebo

[Robot Vacuum Cleaner and Mop] iClebo YCR-M05-10 Arte smart home/office vacuum cleaner and floor mopping robot. November Consumer Reports ‘Best Buy’. Amazon price: $469. 1 year manufacturer’s warranty. New in box never used (my old-fashioned wife won’t allow it in the house): $250 firm.

[“Backup for $60”] There are a million different reasons to back up your stuff. You never know when a tiny two-legged terror might destroy your tech. And with this external hard drive you’ve got enough room to be sure everything is saved and secured so you can relax and keep it coming. Link
cree-drum[Cree Indians 1650] The Cree drum is double-headed, but possessing very little depth, it strongly resembles a tambourine in shape. Its want of depth is compensated, however, by its diameter, which frequently exceeds three feet. It is covered with moose-skin parchment, painted with rude figures of men and beasts, having various fantastic additions, and is beat with a stick. The seeseequay is merely a rattle, formed by enclosing a few grains of shot in a piece of dried hide. These two instruments are used in all their religious ceremonies, except those which take place in a sweating-house.

The habitual intoxication of the Cumberland House Crees has induced such a disregard of personal appearance, that they are squalid and dirty in the extreme; hence a minute description of their clothing would be by no means interesting. All the Cree’s clothing are soon reduced to a very filthy condition by the Indian custom of greasing the face and hair with soft fat or marrow, instead of washing them with water. This practice they say preserves the skin soft, and protects it from cold in the winter, and the moschetoes in summer, but it renders their presence disagreeable to the olfactory organs of a European, particularly when they are seated in a close tent and near a hot fire.

You are never worthless. Your organs go for a lot on the black market.
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[Crooks] Governor Rick Scott has finally done something commendable. He has signed a new public corruption bill. It has been really hard to convict these officials on ethics charges, never mind criminal charges! The new law makes criminal convictions almost possible. Those familiar with the goings-on of FKAA in implementation of the Cudjoe Regional Wastewater System may notice a few things that have occurred that are described as “indictable felonies” under the new law. Here’s a link to the final version signed by the Governor. Link
yogi confucius levitates



[Confucius Say] If man speaks in forest and there is no woman to hear, is he still wrong?


All fig leaves burn
All ugly seen
All truth beauty
All pain loved
All time now
All people one

Tesla_Model3[Tesla New Model 3] Demand for Tesla Motors’ new lower-priced electric car surprised even the company’s CEO Friday as 198,000 people plunked down $1,000 deposits. “Definitely going to need to rethink production planning,” CEO Elon Musk said on his Twitter feed. Musk unveiled the car Thursday night at a design studio near Los Angeles. It starts at $35,000 and has a range of 215 miles per charge, which is far more than most people drive each day. The actual price paid will be much less when government rebates and incentives are subtracted.
[Solar] One good, one bad solar amendment. The Florida Supreme Court advanced the interests of the electric monopolies Thursday by narrowly ruling that an industry-backed solar power amendment to the state Constitution can be placed on the November ballot. Link
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Time for the yearly spaghetti harvest. Video
eye-in-sky-movie[Movie Review] I decided to take in “Eye in the Sky” yesterday evening. A man and a woman standing behind me asked the woman volunteer behind the ticket counter about the movie. She said it was a nice movie, had a happy ending. I said, in the previews, it’s about whether or not to use a drone to blow up a house full of Islamic terrorists. The man in the couple said he hoped they used the drone. The woman behind the counter said I should not spoil the movie. I said I had seen the previews in the Tropic, the movie is about whether nor not to use a drone with an innocent child near the kill zone. Helen Muir is the star, that’s why I came to see the movie. Helen sometimes kills people in movies, “Red”, for example. She’s great actress.

Believe me, there is nothing whatsoever happy in this movie. Nothing. Perhaps it is a good treatment, though, of the grimness of life today. That is, World War III – Islam vs. everyone else. In God’s name. In my country’s name. In whatever’s name. As the British anti-terrorist strike force commander, played by Helen Muir, takes not one single prisoner.

I wish my husband and I knew about before we gave the money from the sale of our second home to our crappy investment counsuler. Yep, it’s all gone. Link

[Sewer Forcemain Air Lock] FKAA swore it wouldn’t happen because there are air release valves at pronounced high points. This in spite of the fact that the system design manual says to place an air release every 2,000 feet even on level ground, but FKAA installed miles of pipe with no means to release air. Their biggest portion contractor Layne has ben struggling with air lock where it was not so likely. The pumps have been working as hard as they can, and a little is coming out the other end, but not enough. Fortunately, there are only a small percentage of connections active or someone would be wading in sewage. They added 3 air releases. One blows almost continuously, one a little, one rarely. Still pitiful flow. Line pressure vanishes between valves. So in the still of night they pumped backward and got the air lock to break… for now. Please report other failures of the new sewers to Photos or video would be great. We need evidence to show that we should have the option of retaining our existing tanks as emergency back-up for an unreliable system. Such an option would save each home about $1,000 on connection and give peace of mind, while being the most ecologically safe.
[“Sugarloaf Key shooter can’t hold his booze”] Now we find out that Derek David or “that dickhead that shot 3 people near Rick’s on Duval”, was drinking at Willy T’s 6 months ago with a pistol on him and the cops took it from him because he was acting like an ass because someone took his truck without asking. Why was this stupid punk not arrested? It is illegal to have a firearm in an establishment that serves alcohol? Who is this douchebag that gets away with something like that? Something stinks. Seems this loser can’t hold his liquor and, anybody that’s intoxicated and in possession of a pistol is someone you don’t want around. Anytime I’m someplace and there’s someone who’s obviously drunk, I bail out of there because you never know who’s packing these days. Whoever those cops are who took his pistol for “safe keeping” (he was able to get it back the next day), have some explaining to do.
fast food window[Living Wage] Fast food employees want a $15.00 per hour minimum wage. Well let’s do some math. At $15.00 per hour Freddie Frenchfryer would make $31,200 per year. A private in the military makes $18,378 or $8.85 per hour. So, these people with zero skills and no real education like Betty Burgerflipper think that they deserve more than our military personnel who get deployed into miserable, hostile environments, get shot at and possibly wounded or killed putting their lives on the line to protect their unskilled asses. Here’s the deal Willie Whoppercooker. A starting police officer, after rigorous training makes about $30,589 or $14.70 per hour, and a fire fighter about $29,500 or $14.18 per hour. And you think you deserve more? You are working at a job designed for a kid in high school who is learning how to work and earning enough for gas money and hanging out with equally undereducated and unqualified friends. If you have chosen this as your life long profession you have failed. If you want a minimum wage of $15.00 per hour, develop some skills or get a marketable education.
[Law Enforcement Update] South Region B Cases Monroe County

-Officer Hein made a physical arrest at the north end of the Channel #5 Bridge in the Upper Keys after checking fisherman for resource violations.  He arrested a subject for possession of cannabis 20g along with eight counts of possession of paraphernalia, possession of cocaine, tampering with evidence, no fishing license and littering.

-An individual in Key West recently informed Officers Foell and Lopez of a dingy that was stolen at the dock in Key West Bight. An initial report was taken by Key West Police Department (KWPD). The individual supplied the officers with a possible suspect that was using the stolen engine on a different vessel. The officers conducted a vessel stop on the suspect and were able to obtain information on the engine, including the serial number. Officer Foell supplied the information and photographs to KWPD detectives. Approximately one week later, Officer Foell and Lopez were on water patrol when they observed a vessel matching the description of the stolen dingy, tied to the mangroves. The stolen vessel was returned to the owner. The owner also received his stolen engine from KWPD. The suspect currently has an active warrant regarding the stolen vessel.

-While patrolling in Bahia Honda State Park, Investigator Cox, Officers Garrison and Rubenstein responded to a call regarding a fight in progress.  Upon arrival, the fight was no longer in progress and there were no apparent injuries reported.  The state park management wanted the subjects to abide by the park rules or to pack up and go home. Officer Rubenstein took pictures and documented the party site that involved a car parked in handicap parking with a broken windshield and open cans and coolers full of beer cans.  The men involved in the incident were given citations for consumption of alcohol in the state park and the driver was cited for the broken windshield and parking in a handicap parking spot. With assistance from Monroe County Sheriff’s Office (MCSO) and the park staff, the party was ended and all the people cleaned up the pavilion and left the park.

-Officers Mattson and Baumgartner were checking fishermen on the Channel #2 Bridge near Craig Key.  Officer Mattson checked a fisherman catch and found numerous violations.  The fisherman was cited for possession of two out-of-season black grouper, possession of two undersized black grouper and possession of over-the-bag limit of black grouper.  He was also cited for possession of an undersized yellowtail snapper.

-Officer Plussa conducted a follow-up boat rental ‘livery’ inspection in Marathon, after responding to a search and rescue for a sinking boat out of that livery the day before. Officer Plussa asked the livery operator if her fleet was rentable and service ready. She stated it was and everything was in order. The officer found numerous administrative, boating safety, and records violations and noted the livery operator made several inconsistent and false statements. The livery operator was charged with five misdemeanors for not possessing rental insurance, not properly vetting customers’ boating safety training, not possessing the required boating safety training to operate a livery and other boating safety violations regarding the equipment in her fleet.

I see many homes in Key West have swimming pools. Is it because our ocean waters are toxic and/or a safety back up for drinking water in case the pipes break?


Mac Stone photography. Link

I have a question for women. Do you have to practice the penetrating look of disapproval or is it something you’re all born with? Teenage girls do it the best.



Does anyone know how I can get the Blue Angels 2013 Southernmost Airshow poster?

[“Pig in the house”] I was under the impression you couldn’t have a pigs or farm animals in any house in Monroe County. What is the ordinance? I want to get me a potbellied pig.
My path to happiness usually leads to a bar or a food truck.


Read carefully.

[Tech Support Scams] Cybercriminals are no longer targeting victims solely through email messages and fake websites. They’re diversifying their tactics and contacting individuals by telephone, claiming to represent well-known software companies and offering to solve computer problems. These individuals may claim that they have detected viruses or other malware on your computer to trick you into granting them remote access to your computer, or paying for software you don’t need. Link
propose engagement ring weddingWhile wedding ceremonies vary, common features of a Jewish wedding include an IOU (marriage contract) which is signed by two hit men, a rented wedding canopy (chuppah or huppah), an expensive ring the groom will be making payments on for the next ten years and given to the bride under the canopy, and the breaking of a beer mug which signifies the groom will never go out with the boys again and do the dishes so the bride will not hurt her hands. What the bride does is collect all the envelopes and stack the loot, plans the honeymoon in the Adirondacks, and tells the groom how she wants to have sex and when. The groom traditionally cries now and forever after. L’chaim!
The traffic in the Keys is horrendous. What would it be like if the Snowbirds decided to live here all year around? Gasp!
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[Jerk of the Month] Goes to deputy Jon Riggs who busted an 80 year old man on Cudjoe Key for pot. This is a black eye for all law enforcement in the Keys. This is a poor use of our tax dollars. Was this guy a real threat? I know we are hard up for deputies but we need to ‘weed’ out jerks like this. There are a lot of good cops in the Keys with good common sense that really care about not ruining someone’s life.


[Benefit] Piners take care of Piners–as we always have. It’s just the way we roll. Should be a fun day, the Key Lime Pie Band will get permission to leave the nursing home for this one! The Ray West Band and Raising Cain will be helping. Good music, good food and a good time for all ages. Steve Miller with host the show. Coconuts loves to be part of a win-win. You have a great time and we help the Rev. Win-Win.The things that may change our world to make it better are smiling, helping, respecting, loving and forgiving. Come on out and help!  ~The “NUT”

[“House pig’s neighbors”] They stated publicly that they will continue to call the city and cause a raucous until they get their way. We do not wish to disrupt anyone else’s lives.

This is what happens when the uber-carpetbaggers move in. I saw it happen in South Fl back in the 1980s. Key West is no longer really an island of acceptance. It’s an island of rich people wanting to live near the party. Perhaps someone needs to share the legend of Bum Farto with them, or maybe do the bad-neighborly thing and take them “fishing”.

iceberg penguins[“Melting Arctic ice cap, glaciers, raising sea level discussion”] One poster says, sure they will because they are on land, and the water from melting flows into the ocean. That’s not true in the Arctic. There they float. In the Antarctic, they are on a land mass, but the south polar ice cap is increasing in size, not melting away.

For many years, man has built dams to back up stores of water–mostly in the northern hemisphere. A physicist crunched the numbers and concluded that the extra weight of all that damned water (pun intended) in the northern hemisphere has upset the spinning balance of the earth and is largely responsible for the increased wobbling that has been documented. Maybe piling extra ice on the Antarctic land mass will reduce the imbalance? What better place to get ice than from floating ice in the Arctic? Animation

Bahia Honda State Park doesn’t have the cost of admission on its site. It says to contact the park. if you’re persistent and keep digging you can find where they list every other fee, but not the one that matters most. How odd that is.
Winn Dixie on Yelp. Link


[Urinal Decorum] And the most important rule is never strike up a conversation at the urinal. I peed at the bar in Key Colony Beach a few days ago and the urinal was mere inches from the sink and there was no privacy shield between. Washing your hands while someone’s schlong is just inches away is very unsettling.

[Computer Power User Magazine] The April edition is now online. Link
Do you want to know what an old baseball glove tastes like? Take a cold slice of cheap pizza and nuke it for 30 seconds. Yuck!
ftr-in-repose[FTR] TRUMP ON ABORTION
Trump 1.0: “I’m pro choice..”
Trump 2.0: “I’m pro life”
Trump 3.0: “Women should be punished if they
have an illegal abortion”
Trump 4.0 “Women should not be punished if
they have an illegal abortion.” “There
has to be some sort of punishment.”
(continued on the National Politics page …)
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