2023 January

Tuesday, January 10, 2023

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[Government Waste] The Refuge is going to spend millions of dollars to fix a problem that does not exist. But not a dime on a problem that does exist. They are raising Key Deer Blvd and Watson Road in order to install culverts to allow water to drain back to the sea after a flood. I’ve watched flooding here since Wilma and Georges and there was no problem with drainage then and there still isn’t.

I asked if they were going to fill the drainage ditches that are super salty. They said no, even though the ditches have a real effect on groundwater and the freshwater lens. Drainage blocked by those two roads is not a problem, but the salty drainage ditches are.
Who are these people who kill the poisonwood trees and want to install culverts in the roads where there is no drainage problem? Where are these people who rule the Refuge located? Are they in D.C.? I doubt they are here in the Refuge. Do they sit in out-of-Keys offices trying to think of solutions to non-existing problem in order to keep busy?

[Messed Up World] So now burning a rainbow flag is called a ‘hate crime‘ but burning the American flag is free speech

[Mr Unlucky] Frane Selak is the luckiest unluckiest man to ever live. He survived numerous accidents that are just mind-boggling. Video

[“National Holiday Tree”] Yes, that is a great idea! So great an idea, they did it first back in 1923, when they planted the live National Christmas Tree near the White House. The current tree was planted in 2011, as past trees eventually sustained weather damage, or were transplanted. Link

Shostakovich Symphony no. 9. Gottsch world premiere. Great opera arias. Sat., Jan. 28 ,Tennessee Williams Theatre at The College of the Florida Keys. Link
[Wounded Warrior Bicyclists] A large and spirited crowd assembled at our VFW Post 10211 in Key Largo, to welcome the Wounded Warrior Bicyclists as they disembarked from their bus to begin their cycling trek through the Florida Key.

The masterful management and coordination of this event by our VFW Post 10211 Commander/State Attorney Dennis Ward and Sheriff Rick Ramsay are significant reasons why this rehabilitative and therapeutic experience has remained in place in Monroe County.

Tavernier Dunkin Donuts donated deliciously made bagels, donuts and coffee for these injured veterans, support personnel and assembled guests. VFW Quartermaster Mark Birk and VFW Trustee Brian Mundey secured this sumptuous donation and set it up in an accessible location for these Disabled Veterans. They all delighted in receiving a pick-me-up before heading out onto US1 to began their journey.

Sheriff Rick Ramsay and the magnificent deputies of his department, secured the safety and protection of these seriously injured veterans on their route through the Keys.

Fire/Rescue Departments, Paramedics, EMT’s, First Responders and Law-enforcement personnel were in support and uplifted these wounded cyclists throughout their journey to Key West. FKEC and FKAA support, along with an extraordinary American Flag on display in front of Coral Shores High School, accelerated the warmth and welcome these veterans had received from citizens and students along US1.

Coral Shores High School and Plantation Key School administrators, students, teacher, staff and parents were beyond awesome. It was absolutely breathtaking to witness and experience the bountiful expressions of love and gratitude they shared with these injured veterans. It appeared, and I was told, there were approximately 900 students, staff and parents that had gathered to welcome, meet, greet and exchange gifts with these Wounded Warriors. Principals Laura Lietaert and Lisa Taylor, along with School Board Members John Dick and Dr. Sue Woltanski, had the amazing experience of witnessing their students freely share their happiness, joy and gratitude with these wounded veterans. In addition, American Legion Islamorada Post 145 members were majestically brilliant, as they painstakingly delivered  an authentic military vehicle for the high school students and staff to explore and enjoy.

It was a majestic day, where healing and love flourished in abundance. Thank you.  ~Sincerely, John Donnelly

[Department of Useless Information] Do you know what is one of the dirtiest places on the planet? The finger holes in a public bowling ball. (Yeh, I’m watching Dirty Jobs.)
[Keys History] I tried to go to my go-to source of information on Keys history, Jerry Wilkinson’s website, but I received this message: “ expired on 12/16/2022 and is pending renewal or deletion.” Does anyone know what happened or how to remedy this situation? We can’t afford to lose such a fine source of info, to say nothing of the years of time, research, and even money spent amassing such a treasure trove of Fla. Keys history. Link

[AI Doctor] This AI is no doctor, but its medical diagnoses are pretty spot-on. Asking an AI about your health issues might be better than WebMD, but it does come with some caveats. Link

Paul’s Appliance on Big Pine. The 305-294-0292 phone disconnected. Is it no more?
[“National Christmas tree”] (Editor: I sent Obama a proposal to plant and maintain a national Christmas tree, but evidently he didn’t like the idea because I only received a form letter [which I lost] back with his signature stamped. I offered everything: the tree, a full website, maintenance, etc.)
[?] Been going to key deer every week waiting for it to dry out. Finally, its dry, but the renters cut it. That’s enough for me. I quit. I wasted a lot of time and gas coming out here. No mas. They can do it themselves.
[“Mourning dove”] I thought incorrectly that their name was “Morning” Dove because they are the first birds up in the morning and they mostly eat before other birds get up. Then they disappear until the next morning. I’ve wondered why sometimes they coo and the rest of the time they are silent. Thanks for that explanation of them mourning when their mate dies.
The Florida Keys Southernmost Car Club is holding our 1st SHOW & SHINE of the New Year 2023 on SUNDAY, January 15th Noon to 3PM at the Sugarloaf Lodge MM17.
This is always a free event to all lovers of classic, custom, sports and street rod automobiles of all years and makes. There is plenty of room for parking show cars and outdoor seating in the grass under the trees with a plaque for People’s Choice and 50’s and 60’s music from our new sound system.  Bring the kids to enjoy these beautiful relics of the auto world. The Club is seeking new members.  Join at the show and receive a new style Club shirt and Club sticker. For more information contact Lance Stehman 305-797-6782
Congratulations to the Winners from the Xmas show!
Best Paint, Joe Colabella, 1961 Cadillac Coupe Deville
Best Interior, Brad Willliams, 1970 Road Runner
Best Early Model Pre 1960, Rich Welter, 1955 Chevy Wagon
Best Late Model After 1960, Michael Mushinski, 1969 Firebird Trans AM
Best Sports Model, Rich Welter, 1981 Porsche 911 S K-3
Best Engine, Joe Garcia, 1964 Corvette
Best Pickup, Ed Harper, 1937 P.T. 50 Plymouth
Best in Show, Lenny Roslan, 1964 Corvette
Peoples Choice, Nick Hardins, 1932 Ford B Coupe


[T-Shirt] It’s a Southern thing.  You wouldn’t understand.

[Story Telling] Last Stand of the Florida Keys brings together a rare night of Notable Authors for a conversation about Keys environmental challenges. Saturday January 28th, at 5:00pm, Last Stand of the Florida Keys will bring together a powerhouse of 6 local storytellers all on one stage at Hugh’s View Roof Terrace at the Studios of Key West as part of their 2023 Annual Meeting. Link
[Help Wanted] Morning Joint, selling “Colombian Gold” coffee. On January 23, Morning Joint will open on Cudjoe Key 7 days a week, though only open till 4:20. At 4:20 you’re expected to be at My New Joint above the Square Grouper on Cudjoe Key. Now hiring baristas and short-order cooks asap for our opening team. Experience is a plus, but not a deal-breaker. Great hourly wages plus tips for all employees. Email us at to set up an interview asap. Flexible schedules for full-time and part-time employees.
Glaucoma is a leading cause of blindness in those over 60 years of age. Because vision loss from glaucoma can occur before symptoms are noticed, annual eye exams are extremely important. Early detection and treatment of glaucoma is crucial for preserving vision and preventing vision loss.
[California Storm] Montecito residents told to flee deadly downpour. Forecasters are warning state residents to brace for a “relentless parade of cyclones” over the next week. Heavy winds pummeled the Sacramento region late Saturday night, toppling trees and knocking out power for more than 300,000 customers, as California braced for yet another series of storms this week that could bring additional flooding, more outages and tree damage, as well as dangerous mudslides and mountain snow.


[Fuel Tank Leak] Does anybody know anybody that pressure tests boat fuel tanks? Thanks

Prince Harry and Meghan were given a fabulous castle for a wedding present by the royals, but it wasn’t enough. The 3 million pounds he gets each year wasn’t enough. They should have lived happily ever after, but it wasn’t enough when people noticed she was half negro and mentioned it; and that’s when the shit to hit the fan. She married into one of the most traditional White families in history—centuries of royal tradition and she was upset they noticed she was black? Harry is such a pussy. He should have kept his pussy mouth shut and continued to live like royalty in their palace and do his Royal duty. He had an obligation instilled into him since birth and he let his little head do his thinking. Pussy!


I’m so old-fashioned I can remember when there was only one flavor of vodka.

The current Coconut Telegraph was published on 1/10/23 at 9:49 am.