Tuesday, June 9, 2020

Letters to the editor with pictures since 2002. Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage days, Tuesdays and Fridays.



[Quarantine] How birds and others are adjusting to our new reality. I feel this way. In fact, I have been following such protocol this evening. Bombay Sapphire to be exact.

[“Police officers”] No, the pay isn’t great. That’s what makes them even more honorable that they would risk their lives for people for that low pay? There’s a quote: “Would you risk your life for a million dollars?” Cops do it for a whole lot less.

They do risk their lives, they do it to keep us safe and they are heroes for it. That’s right, that they are willing to go through that kind of crap daily to keep society from being infected by the lowest of the low is incredibly honorable and selfless. Mostly duty to country/ helping people. I’ve never met an officer who didn’t have the highest kind of integrity I’d ever seen. Somebody has to do the dirty work. Police officers are among, if not the highest, heroes out there. I wouldn’t want my kid doing it though.



[Gun Violence] Elmer Fudd chases Bugs Bunny with scythe in new gun-free cartoon. Video

Tom Jones and grandson duet. Green, Green Grass Of Home. Video

[Treasure Found] The search for Forrest Fenn’s hidden treasure has come to an end. It was under a canopy of stars in the lush, forested vegetation of the Rocky Mountains and had not moved from the spot where I hid it more than 10 years ago,” said Fenn in a statement on his website. “I do not know the person who found it, but the poem in my book led him to the precise spot. I congratulate the thousands of people who participated in the search and hope they will continue to be drawn by the promise of other discoveries. So the search is over.” Video

Mothers, don’t let your kids grow up to be cops. The pay isn’t that great. Your life is at risk every time you start your shift. You have to deal with a lot of questionable people and criminals. Is it the excitement – the power you have over other people or the desire to help other people? If it’s truly a desire to help other people wouldn’t there be other, more safe professions to help other people?

[Tesla Turbine Rotary Steam Engine] I was reading about the Tesla Turbine rotary steam engine and found this post script about his mysterious electric car: Although Tesla never tested his turbine in a car, he did, by some accounts, develop an electric car in 1931. The car was a Pierce-Arrow, which had been configured with an 80-horsepower, 1,800-rpm electric motor instead of a gas-powered engine. According to the story, Tesla assembled a mysterious black box containing vacuum tubes, wires and resistors. Two rods stuck out of the box. When the rods were pushed into the box, the car received power. Tesla drove the car for a week — up to speeds of 90 miles per hour. Unfortunately, many believed he had tapped into some unknown and dangerous force of nature. Others called him crazy. In a rage, he removed the box from the car, took it back to his lab, and it was never seen again. To this day, the fundamental working principles of Tesla’s electric car remain a mystery. Link

Young people make “change”. Don’t forget that. Whenever you can get young people to take to the streets, eventually the change they want happened. It has been that way for a long time. Watch the college kids, they are the future. What they want now is what we will have when they grow up and hold the reigns of government and industry
[Tribal Warfare] Several years ago I wrote a piece about tribal warfare. Tribal warfare has existed ever since humanly populated the earth. “My tribe is better than your tribe.” This week it again struck pitching blacks against whites throughout America. Will there ever be racial equality anywhere on earth? If history has anything to show us that there’s no solution to a tribal problem . There’s tribal warfare going on all over the planet forever and get over it. There’s no solution. The idea of peace is a fool’s dream. There’s continuous conflicts throughout the Universe. Consider the atom, positive and negative parts, or consider a black hole gobbling up everything in its path. Your best plan is to deal with it the best you can.
[Change] Want to make a real change?  Don’t defund the police, defund the politicians!
[State of Emergency] Monroe County is in a state of declared emergency. Well if this is a fact, then how can the County Commission open the Keys to tourists? Is it because of the money? The opening of the Keys has absolutely nothing to do with the local populations health or safety — nothing. The local businesses are not prepared or stocked to take care of local populations and now those greedy bastards are throwing open the doors for the sake of a few crummy dollars and have no concern of what could happen if the virus strikes back. And who’s going to enforce the social distancing and mandatory face masks? Can you seriously picture the Key West Police department (with their history of “gentle enforcement”) dealing with unruly tourists who refuse to cooperate. Looks like more lawsuits.



[50 Year Anniversary of Surf Music] Jan & Dean later changed their names to Flo & Eddie and hosted a radio show in LA in the 70s that was one of the craziest shows I ever heard. They soon got taken off the air. One time they were smoking pot and drinking shots on the air to show how “terrible’ that was. Joan Biaz, who at that time was more anti-Vietnam activist than folk singer was in the same building for an interview and picked the wrong time to drop in on Flo & Eddie. She was as serious as a heart attack. She had no sense of humor and only anger. She was on the wrong show for that. Those guys tore her up. They made so much silly fun of her that she took her protest signs, anger, and stormed out of the studio. That was the funniest radio interview I ever heard. Jan & Dean — Surf City

[Renters’ Protection] Protections for renters during the coronavirus pandemic. Renters are expected to continue paying their rent during the eviction moratorium period, if they can. Those experiencing financial hardship should reach out to their landlord to discuss their situation and potential solutions. Link



[Sword In The Stone Updated] Legend says that only a construction worker who is pure of heart may retrieve it.

[What are deer chewing all the time, cud?”] Yes, they are chewing cud which is a pretty complicated behavior since they regurgitate and chew the same stuff twice and it goes into separate stomachs. Several scientists around the world noted that for bovids, “chewing cud” seems to be a pleasant, relaxing activity during which they often lie down and almost fall asleep. We have observed the same on our property with Key Deer.

If you carefully observe our Key deer after they have eaten, you’ll see a blob of “cud” shoot up their neck after which they’ll start chewing. Val (my wife) and I will try to get a slow motion  movie of this for the Coconut Telegraph by next week, along with a fun but educational explanation of “chewing cud”.


[Fishing Racism] Thoughts on the killing of George Floyd. Systemic racism is everywhere. Even in the great outdoors. Link

[“Not a Democracy”] Constitutional republic? I’ve never heard of that, really! I always thought we were a democracy. We tell the world we’re a democracy, should we not use that word any longer? I want this country to become a democracy where people’s votes actually count. They stopped teaching Civics in my state in 1960. That was a shame.


[Free Tax Service] With just over one month until the July 15 federal tax filing deadline, those who still need to file their 2019 taxes and who meet eligibility criteria may be able to use the Virtual VITA preparation offered by United Way of Collier and the Keys.  Due to the COVID-19 social distancing recommendations, UWCK has transitioned to a completely virtual tax preparation option for Monroe County residents with limited income and a simple tax return. This service is limited to residents whose household income was below $56,000 in 2019 and who have income from 3 or less W-2s and 1099s only, and no self-employment or investment income.  There is absolutely no charge to the taxpayer for this service.

[“Killing Black men”] Nothing will change.  Nothing has changed since the Civil Right Bill was passed. Just talk. At the very least, police should have more training.
[“Dead people don’t loot”] The poster seems to thinks it’s okay to murder someone if he tries to take your TV. Weird world it is.


[Protests] I don’t think anyone, Right or Left, has a problem with anyone exercising 1st Amendment Rights, but the 1st Amendment says “peaceful assembly” not burn businesses to the ground, attack peaceful demonstrators or kill law enforcement. You’re going to love America 2.0 when police departments are “disbanded”. Who are you going to call when you need help?

[Vote] If you can loot in person you can vote in person!

[Growing Tomatoes] To help your plant in 4 ways give them aspirin!  Spray water with dissolved aspirin on your plant to prevent disease. Video

[The New Normal] Just say no, it is a new abnormal — simply misrepresented. A KGB defector defined ideological subversion thus:
“What it basically means is to change the perception of reality of every American to such an extent that despite of the abundance of information no one is able to come to sensible conclusions in the interest of defending themselves, their families, their community, and their country.”
“The highest art of warfare is not to fight at all, but to subvert anything of value in the country of your enemy until such time that the perception of reality of your enemy is screwed up to such an extent that he does not perceive you as an enemy. You can take your enemy without a single shot being fired.” In this roughly 1 hour video, Mr. Bezmenov explains to a live audience exactly how subversion tactics are employed to destabilize a country. The KGB spends about 85% of its operational funds on subversion, not espionage. The tactics he explains are evident worldwide in the current virus over-reactions and mind manipulations. Be aware of psychological warfare tactics if you wish to retain your freedom, your future, your life! Video
[Fat Cops] In most of America, once an officer is on the job, very few departments have annual physicals or PT testing. It would be a huge labor issue and the police unions would win that one — hands down. I don’t know how it is in the Keys.

As for fat police officers, you should realize that obesity is an epidemic in the US. Now imagine what it is like when you work rotating shifts and overtime and time in court. Your meals are limited to fast food and donuts and coffee. You have to hustle to have time with your family and maybe work a second or third job. So, good nutrition and time to work out gets pretty limited.

Most fat officers can really do the job. And they do enough to protect the public. I only know of one profoundly obese officer who got out on a disability because of his fatness. Smart departments are building time into the work schedule to allow officers to leave patrol to go workout. But of course, the citizens get outraged at that. They want their tax money spent on officers on patrol, not in the gym.

[“Black lives matter more”] The protesters are trying to wake you up to the fact that this happens to black men all the time not just once in a hundred years in Key West! There were 2 black men murdered in just the last two weeks. Find me a young black man in a city, not the Keys, who hasn’t been forced to the ground during a traffic stop. Murder by cop is rampant in American cities if you’re Black. It’s hard for you White people to understand because you are already prejudice against people of color.
[Weird News] Man has a whole fish stuck in his rectum after sitting on it by accident (year, sure, pervert!). Video


[Social Distancing Not Necessary] No new coronavirus cases reported from Lake Of The Ozarks partiers. Link

[Blackman Mantra] “I can’t breathe.” They should say a prayer every day, thanking God for cellphone cameras.
The shores of Normandy by D-Day veteran Jim Radford. Video


[For Rent] 2 bedrooms. One bath. Unfurnished Duplex on clean boating canal w/seawall going to Pine Channel and coral reef. Tiled floors throughout. Stainless steel appliances. Ceiling fans in living room, kitchen and bath. Laundry room. Small screened porch. Very clean. A/C., large brick patio. Parking for 2 vehicles. Ground level. Port Pine heights subdivision. Quiet neighborhood. 750 square feet. No smokers or dogs. $1800 a month. First, last and $1000 security ($4600 total to move in) Utilities not included. 3970 No Name Road. Email for further info. More pictures on Craigslist. Link

[Trust] 1. 70 year old man knocked down and left bleeding. Cops said he “tripped.” 2. Floyd’s neck broken. Police: He “had a gun.”
Don’t believe what cops say. They break the law and then lie about it. Did you ever hear of a cop “planting” a gun by the victim after saying he was armed.


[Allotropes] Scientists Have Created Black Nitrogen with a diamond anvil. Scientists have cultivated an unheard-of form of nitrogen that forms crystalline layers. Under pressure, gas elements can form unexpected and unstable allotropes. “Black nitrogen” proves nitrogen has more than one allotrope after all. Link

[“America not a Democracy”] I don’t buy the explanation for the Electoral College that the “vote would become incredibly skewed and biased for highly populated areas. That’s bs. I say one man—one vote! If one area wants a certain candidate, so what? that’s what the majority wanted. Majority rule.


[Sainthood] According to the Knights of Columbus, the miracle involved a mother whose pregnancy was threatened by a medical condition in 2015. The family prayed to Father McGivney’s ghost and the condition was healed. Pope Francis has now attributed this to the priest, who died in 1890 at age 38.

[Chris Rock’s “Bad Apple”] This joke will forever be relevant. Video

Hold the fort for I am coming” That quote was under my yearbook picture. I kind of liked it. What a terrible job it must have been to choose what to caption yearbook pictures. Everyone remembers theirs. Now, 50 years later,  my yearbook caption would read “Hold the fart because someone’s coming.”

[Ironyman] Do you think the guy that coined the term “one hit wonder” ever came up with any other popular phrases?