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Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage pick-up days,
Tuesdays and Fridays.
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 [Are Florida Keys Schools Open] As of Monday night, Keys public schools and Monroe County’s and other municipalities’ government offices were expected to stay open as the storm passes by the island chain Tuesday and Wednesday. “We will continue normal operations, with obviously, heightened precautions,” |
| I went to the Monroe County School District website to see if the schools are open and there is not one mention of Hurricane Idalia. https://www.keysschools.com |
 [Which parks are closed] Two state parks — Bahia Honda State Park and Fort Zachary Taylor Historic State Park — will be closed Tuesday. Link |
| [“Drink water”] 8-10 glasses of water also reduces hemorrhoids. And makes your skin look healthier. |
 [Will the Airport Remain Open] All services such as Key West International Airport and garbage pickup will still be ongoing and open. |
| [One Act Play] AVOCADO: Hello I’m good fat.BACON: *Lights cigarette* *Punches avocado* |
 [Labor Day Hurricane] Traditionally we get a hurricane on Labor Day. This year it’s a few days early. This one’s named Idalia. |
| [Crooks] Monroe and other counties’ GPS theft ring busted. All 11 suspects, 10 of whom were arrested Wednesday, reside in Miami-Dade County and face a total of 122 charges. The bond for all 11 suspects totaled $3.9 million. Video |
 [Medicare Part G] You are an older senior citizen, and you can no longer take care of yourself and need long term care, but the government says there is no nursing home care available for you, what do you do? You may opt for Medicare Part G. The plan gives anyone 75 or older a gun (Part G for gun) and one bullet. You may then shoot one worthless politician. This means you will be sent to prison for the rest of your life where you will receive three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating and air conditioning, cable TV, a library, and all the health care you need. Need new teeth? No problem. Need glasses? That’s great. Need a hearing aid, new hip, knees, kidney, lungs, sex change, or heart? They are all covered! As an added bonus, your kids can come and visit you at least as often as they do now!And who is paying for all of this? The same government that just told you they can’t afford for you to go into a nursing home. And you will get rid of a useless politician while you are at it. And now, because you are a prisoner, you don’t have to pay taxes. Is this a great country or what? |
| [Arthritis] 10 foods that can help relieve joint pain. Link |
 Government’s alcohol czar warns Americans could soon be told to limit themselves to just two beers per week under strict new booze guidelines.Dr George Koob said America could slash its drinking guidelines. He warned that alcohol raised the risk of cancer, heart disease and other issues. (Woman, 104, reveals her secrets to a long life — which include a beer every evening to unwind.) Link |
| [Pearly Whites] When you hear my name associated with pearly whites, they’re talking about my legs. |
 Massive emergency alert test will sound alarms on every US phone, TV and radio in October. On Wednesday, October 4 at 2:20 pm ET, every TV, radio and cell phone in the United States will blare out the distinctive, jarring electronic warning tone of an emergency alert, accompanied by a notice along these lines:
“This is a nationwide test of the Emergency Alert System, issued by the Federal Emergency Management Agency, covering the United States from 14:20 to 14:50 hours ET. This is only a test. No action is required by the public.” |
[Denim] Men in denim built this country. Men in suits have destroyed it. |
| [National Hurricane Center] NHC issuing advisories for the Atlantic on Hurricane Idalia |
[Murder] The likelihood of being murdered is less than 0.01 percent. If it does happen, data shows most victims knew their murderer |
| How will Hurricane Idalia affect South Florida weather? What the forecast says. Link |
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| [Centennial Bank Branches Open] Tropical Storm Idalia Inclement Weather Update Customers, employees and friends please note branch updates below and please use extreme caution if traveling. If your normal banking routine becomes interrupted please know Centennial Bank is here for you. ATM’s and/or ITM’s (Interactive Teller machines)1 are available for access in the event of an emergency. Employees effected by inclement weather, evacuations etc. please remember to follow our CEN-SAFE procedures and check-in with your supervisor every 24 hours if you are capable. The check-in number is (833) CEN-SAFE. Online banking2 as well as the Mobile App2,3 are accessible online should you need to check your balance, transfer funds or pay a bill.The Customer Care Center is open Monday-Friday from 7am CT to 7pm CT and Saturday 8am CT to 2pm CT. See “Get in Touch” section below for phone number or use the web form to be contacted by us if you prefer. Access to live tellers is available through our ITM’s where available Monday-Saturday from 7am ET to 7pm ET. |
COCONUT CREAM PIE |
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 Chinese 2021 EV cars rotting away. They are abandoned only to keep China’s EV sales numbers higher than Tesla’s. Video |
| The new standard of kid put downs: “Oh, yeah? Well, your dad buys Bud Light at Target!” |
 Blood Drives on Big Pine in September are listed below. Donor gifts are a One Blood “Wear Pink Give Red” breast cancer shirt and $20 eGift Card. To schedule an appointment visit http://www.oneblood.org and enter your zip code and the from and to dates. FDA donor eligibility rules that changed on August 21 are listed on our home page which may make you eligible to donate. As always, thank you to those who donate blood. Monday, September 4 – Bealls 11 – 4, Thursday, September 28 – Bealls 11 – 4 |
| [Dysgeusia During Pregnancy] When everything tastes bad. Some people find that everything they eat tastes bad when they’re pregnant. This is called dysgeusia. Learn more about why dysgeusia occurs and how to cope. Link |
 A coastal flood advisory was issued for the Middle Keys and a flood statement for the Upper Keys. In the Middle Keys, the weather service expects saltwater flooding on low elevation streets, some overflown drains and several over-topped docks and seawalls. Link |
| The current Coconut Telegraph was published on 8/29/23 at 8:42 am. |