Letters to the editor with pictures since 2002.
Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage pick-up days,
Tuesdays and Fridays.
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|[Third World] I just got back from a trip with 11 family members to Jamaica. Never again! If you think getting a room key that works or even clean towels should be easy to do, forget about it. The resort staff desperately needed training. Not only in hospitality, but in basic human life. It’s a comedy show watching 6 or 8 staff standing around, just chit chatting, eating from a Styrofoam feed tray, talking with food in mouth, while a paying tourist is watching hours go by of their stay.
Just when you thought Key West was beyond repair, here comes “Jamaica, mon.”
[Sick Society] We spend an inordinate amount of time and resources on abortion and nothing on gun control.
|Is artificial intelligence more dangerous than nukes? Link|
From the third world to the 1st world. Shizuoka, Japan, like night and day.
|[Texas School Shooter] He fired outside school for 12 minutes before entering. Link|
[Rebar Canes] Anybody know who makes plastic dipped, rubber tipped 5/8” rebar canes?
|[My Favorite Things Updated] Sing along …
Botox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.
Cadillacs and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.
When the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don’t feel so bad.
Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things.
Back pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin’,
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin’,
And we won’t mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things.
When the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I’ve had,
And then I don’t feel so bad.
|[“Killing poisonwood”] So what if the trees they are killing are Manchineel. They are native and belong here. We can’t pick and choose what native plants we allow to live. That’s why we have refuges—to protect nature, not just cute fury critters and beautiful flowers, but all native species. It the State is determined to kill something, how about starting with iguanas. Link|
|[Friday Joke] Oxymorons
Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
Why is the third hand on a watch called the second hand?
If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?
If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?
Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?
Why does “slow down” and ” slow up” mean the same thing?
Why does “fat chance” and “slim chance” mean the same thing?
Why do “tug” boats push their barges?
Why do we sing “Take me out to the ball game” when we are already there?
Why are they called “stands” when they are made for sitting?
Why is it called “after dark” when it is really “after light”?
Doesn’t “expecting the unexpected” make the unexpected expected?
Why are a “wise man” and a “wise guy” opposites?
Why do “overlook” and “oversee” mean opposite things?
Why is “phonics” not spelled the way it sounds?
If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?
If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular.
|[Delete Your Social Media Now] Here’s why. Video|
|[Off the Grid] Secret underground tunnel shelter. The only thing they don’t show is how she got drinking water. This works in clay but don’t try digging in our marl. Video|
[The Impossible Statue] The Marvelous Marble Net of Il Disinganno was carved out of one single block of marble. Link
|[Guns] President Biden just recorded his “We Should Do Something” speech so he won’t have to keep repeating himself every week. Very efficient.|
[Shooter Summary for May] Week #1: Black as victims. Week #2: Asians. Week #3 Jews. Week #4 Children.
|[Mass Shooters] Stop looking for someone to blame and making the same speech every week saying how “something should be done”. Fix blame where it belongs with guns and the 2d Amendment. Look no further.|
|[Memorial Day ceremony] This ceremony will be held in the auditorium of our Upper Keys Government Center in Key Largo on Monday, May 30th, promptly at 11AM. A United States Coast Guard honor guard, our community band, an accomplished Sheriff’s Office bagpiper, a powerful Memorial Day tribute video and an esteemed Gold Star father delivering our keynote address, will all join together in celebrating this prestigious event.|
|Watch a salamander in a wind tunnel parachute to slow its descent. Video|
[Guns] Over six thousand Americans killed by fellow Americans so far this year! More Americans were killed than Ukrainians — and they are at war!
|[Guns] After the “something should be done” speeches have been made they will start the blame game, but they will never address the actual problem –too many guns.|
[“Killing poisonwood”] Follow the money! The last person who actually cared for, and served for, the animals was the late Jack Watson, the first Refuge Manager. The present day managers are all busy creating things to do to protect their jobs. Just leave nature alone.
|[Kids want to be cowboys and princesses”] I remember in about the 2d grade the nuns had us write down what we wanted for our vocation. None of us could figure out what a vocation was, and the dumb nun couldn’t explain it to 7-year-olds. Catholic schools in those days was stifling to learning. What possible use could studying Latin for 2 years have? Sure, its good to be familiar with Latin as part of learning English’s roots. But you’ll never use it except to by condoms–Trojans. That about the only word I remember. And legatos -that means sword. I remember that too. Why didn’t they teach a Spanish, French, German or Italian for those 2 years. Something we could thank the nuns for instead of always making fun of them and their costumes.|
I think it odd that the poppy, source of heroin and degeneracy, is used to remember dead soldiers on Memorial Day.
|[“Killing poisonwood”] Manchineel – how to identify this poisonous plant. It looks like poisonwood. Link|
|[Friday Joke] How do you identify dogwood?
Ans: By the bark.
[Woman’s Rights] Imagine saying you stand for woman’s rights while letting men dominate women’s sports and nominating a trans man for woman of the year.
|[“Killing poisonwood”] The Refuge people sit around all day trying to think of things to do. The latest dumb idea is to build culverts on Key Deer Blvd and Watson Rd to improve drainage. Oh, drainage is not a problem? Well, why are they spending millions of dollars on this project? These PHDs sit around in some foreign state thinking of things to do down here. The culverts are their most recent “job security” project. What’s next. Killing poisonwood?|
[Cut The Red One] People are shocked when they find out I’m not a licensed marine electrician.
|[Sick Society] Make womb for breakfast! ‘Uterus-shaped’ cereal aims to normalize conversations about periods. A ‘uterus-shaped’ cereal has been launched with the goal of putting conversations about periods on the table. Feminine care brand Intimina developed its raspberry-flavored ‘Period Crunch’. Link|
[Murder] It’s the guns stupid! Without them there would be no mass shootings. Blame the guns and stop looking for other excuses. That’s just what they are.
|[Refuge Protection a Joke] You aren’t allowed to kill Poisonwood or Manchineel trees. And I doubt if all those dead trees along Key Deer Blvd were Manchineel.|
|[Sexual Abuse] Finally, the Roman Catholic pedophiles are joined by the Southern Baptist: Those phony slaves to purity and righteousness. No dancing. No drinking. Only pedophilia has been allowed. Another bunch of religious hypocrites. Link|
|[Manchineel] if it is Manchineel that the government is killing on Big Pine, is it right to kill native plants in a refuge? even if that plant is the most deadly plant in North America? Is it right to pretend you know more than nature does?|
[Wetstock 17] Well folks, last post before Wetstock 17, a day of peace & music. The planned chaos is in place and the bands are set. Enjoy the day, I will!
Flip Flop Bob
|[Town Hall Meetings] Monroe County will be hosting several in-person town hall meetings to provide the public the opportunity to give feedback and input on the strategic priorities for the upcoming fiscal year 2023 (FY23). During the town hall-style meetings hosted by Senior Director of Strategic Planning Kimberly Matthews, attendees will be able to take a live survey, see real-time results, make comments on current strategic priorities, and offer new priorities.
June 3 – Middle Keys Veteran’s and Strategic Town Hall – 11 a.m. at Marathon Public Library Branch
June 8 – Big Pine Key Strategic Town Hall – 6 p.m. at Big Pine Key Community Park (End of Sands Road)
June 14 – Upper Keys Veteran’s and Strategic Town Hall – 11 a.m. at Murray Nelson Government Center, Key Largo
June 17 – Lower Keys Veteran’s and Strategic Town Hall – 11 a.m. @ Harvey Government Center, Key West
[Movie Review] Top Gun: Maverick. Review from a naval aviator’s perspective. Link
|[Captain Doom and Gloom] The only thing keeping clean energy from the public is greed. Oil kills everything with fumes, waste and heat. Solar made this rock, but humans are not smart enough to engineer it. Nukes will kill us all. Electric is clean if generated by falling water or tides. Bikes are what this rock needs to get humanity back into shape. Walking too. When they develop artificial intelligent machines to do all the work we will be no more because the machines don’t need food or toilet paper.|
UK Prime minister Boris Johnson “party gate” fits right in Key West lifestyle. He could run for mayor here
|[Killers] Kids don’t care about Constitutional rights to assault weapons, they just want to be safe.|
[Puppy] Nice and safe. “Please, Mom, can we keep her?”
|[Friday Joke] Lawyer Joke (or not). The Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper, Guido, has cheated him out of $10,000,000. His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that Guido would hear nothing and would therefore never have to testify in court. When the Godfather goes to confront Guido about the missing $10 million, he takes along his lawyer, who knows sign language. The Godfather tells the lawyer, “Ask him where the money is.” The lawyer, (using sign language), asks Guido, Where’s the money? Guido signs back, “I don’t know what you are talking about.”
The lawyer tells the Godfather, “He says he doesn’t know what you are talking about.” The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to Guido’s head and says, “Ask him again or I’ll kill him!”
The lawyer signs to Guido, “He’ll kill you if you don’t tell him.”
Guido trembles and signs back, “OK. You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed at my cousin Bruno’s house.”
The Godfather asks the lawyer, “What did he say?”
The lawyer replies, “He says you don’t have the balls to pull the trigger.”
If it looks like this it is a male red winged blackbird not an oriole